Long Way Home
by angel-castiel-rules-the-world
Summary: Starts at the beginning of S5, then will go to end of S8/beginning of S9. After being tortured Deeks hands in his badge, leaving not just the police but LA completely. This is the story of what he discovers and how he finds his way back home, and exactly what that home truly is. Slowburn Callen/Deeks AU.
1. Chapter 1

**Hello my lovelies okay, I know, I really shouldn't be starting a new story, but this one has been going round in my head for a while now and I needed to write it down.**

 **I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS: LA, nor any of the words I have taken from the show.**

* * *

It was the end of the first case since Deeks had returned to the team after being tortured. He'd done it. Finished his first day back, or his first case back, it had taken more than a day to complete after all. He knew he should feel some sort of achievement at having done that. At being able to do his job and not let his experiences affect his work. But he didn't. Something inside him still felt… off. He didn't feel as he had before when they got the bad guys. Didn't feel a part of the team as he always had done. No. In truth all he felt was a bone deep weariness that never seemed to go away. A hollowness where everything that he loved about his job used to be. He didn't like it. He wanted it to go away. Wanted everything to go back to how it had been, but how could it? He didn't know what he needed to do get rid of the emptiness inside him, he wished he did. Wished he could just wave a magic wand and have everything back to how it should be. He would do anything for things to go back to how they had been. To be the man he once was, instead of this shell he was existing in now. Anything…

But still he played his part. Played the joker, the clown, the comic relief for the others. It was a role like any other, and he was the master at playing a role. He just… he didn't know anymore.

"Deeks, can I talk to you?" Came Callen's voice, interrupting his musings as their partners went to pack up after the day.

"Yeah, the backs fine, thanks for asking." Deeks replied with a cheeky smile on his lips, slipping back into his persona with ease, though not as much ease as he used to. He didn't want to show how effected he still was by all that had gone on before. Though Callen's next words left him feeling exposed, as if there was at least one other person who could see what he was truly thinking, feeling, or not feeling as the case may be.

"I don't want you here."

"Sorry, what? Okay this is usually where you insert the punch line." Deeks replied desperately hoping Callen was playing a bad joke on him. He didn't want him to know the depths of what he was going through. Didn't want him to see through his mask, even if he knew Callen was the one person who had always seemed to be able to do so.

"I don't want you here until you're ready to be back." Callen explained looking deep into the younger man's eyes. He had watched him throughout this case. Had watched as he tried to find his place once more, but he couldn't help but think that he had failed. He didn't want Deeks to come back just because that was what was expected of him. He wanted him to want to return, to want to be part of their team once more. And he needed to make sure the other man knew that.

"Heh. Okay. Did you… did you see me today? I mean I was like Starsky and Hutch." Deeks bluffed hoping he would get out of this conversation with his usual combination of wit and jokey words. He didn't want to have this conversation. Not now. Not when he still wasn't sure… not when he still couldn't feel what he once had.

"I'm talking about your mind-set. I can't have you coming in here second-guessing yourself, trying to figure out if this job still makes sense for you. That's not safe for you. It's not safe for us." Callen continued relentlessly. He knew he was being harsh, he knew he words were hurting Deeks, but it had to be said, and it was his job as team leader to say them. He needed to know Deeks was there with them every step of the way. He couldn't be worrying about him all the time, there was no room for that sort of thing, not in this job.

"Yeah." Deeks replied. And looking into Callen's eyes he knew there was no hiding the hole inside himself from this man. The hole that was all that was left of the love he used to have for this job. There was one person who could see through his masks to the man beneath, could read that man like a book. He wasn't sure if he should feel glad to know someone understood, or terrified. But looking at Callen he knew one thing. He was right.

"Yeah." He agreed once more before he pulled off his badge and gun, and handed them over to the startled man in front of him. "I know strictly speaking, you're not my boss. But you were more of one than Bates, so…"

"Don't do this. Take some more time." Callen replied, even though he took the items held out to him. He could see in Deeks' eyes that there was nothing he could say to stop him from doing what he was. Nothing would keep him there, and maybe that was a good thing, maybe that was what Deeks need. Maybe the kid needed a change, needed something they could no longer give him. It wasn't the outcome he had wanted from this conversation, but if that was what Deeks felt he needed, then Callen was not going to stand in his way.

"Time isn't going to help, Callen. I need to step out of the shadows and live in the sun. And I can't do that here." Deeks replied with a small smile, knowing that the man in front of him understood what he was saying, probably more than he did in all honesty.

And Callen did. He knew Deeks didn't just mean NCIS by here. He meant LA in general. He wasn't just leaving the team, he was leaving everything behind. He was running. An understandable reaction to what had happened, but one Callen knew would achieve nothing in the long run. Therefore he couldn't stop himself from replying, "You know the problem with the sun, Deeks? No matter where you go, your shadow is always with you."

"I guess that's a risk I'm going to have to take. Thanks for everything, Callen, and tell the others… tell the others I said goodbye." Deeks responded with a small smile. Because while Callen's words might well be true, the only way he was going to find out was to try. And he had to try something. He couldn't do this anymore. Couldn't be this man anymore. He was done.

"When you're ready, you know where to find us. There'll always be room for you on this team." Callen replied sincerely, offering his hand for the other man to shake, hoping he would understand what he meant. That to him Deeks was part of his family and that he would always be there for him when he needed it. He would come if he called.

At those words Deeks nodded, shaking the hand offered without a word. He couldn't get any past the lump that was in his throat. For a minute he wanted to change his mind. To take back his gun and badge and beg Callen to forget everything he had said but he knew he couldn't. This was what he needed to do for him, and no one else. But he was glad to know he had a safety net if he fell. Beyond glad to know that if he ever needed him, Callen would be there without thought. He would have thought it strange that he would only find out how much Callen cared about him as he was leaving, if that was, he didn't know the man as well as he had come to. Callen was never one for wearing his heart on his sleeve after all.

As soon as Deeks let go of Callen's hand he moved to grab his bag. He knew he should probably clear out his desk, but there was nothing there he wanted to take with him. Nothing there that he needed wherever it was he was going. Nothing was left here that he couldn't walk away from.

With that thought he turned with his usual sunny smile to his partner and the other agent on the team.

"See you later Kens, Sam."

And with that he walked out of the building and into the sun. And for the first time since the torture he felt something other than empty. Wherever it was a good something or not, he didn't have a clue. Only time would give him the answer to that one. But it was answer he wanted to find.

* * *

And Callen still standing where Deeks had left him holding the gun and badge couldn't help but curse to himself.

"Damn it, Deeks. Be careful." He muttered, before turning towards Hetty's office. He had to hand in the detectives resignation, to more than one boss, and he didn't for a minute think either of them were going to be happy about it.


	2. Chapter 2

**Hello my lovelies. I would like to thank** **Lic. Lu** **, Vadercat, Guest, heyjode and Petunia3116** **for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since I posted this story.**

 **So here is the next chapter, at the end I have a question for you all that I would really like an answer to, as I can write it both ways and I was wondering which you would prefer. Let me know in either a review or PM.**

 **Anyway I hope you enjoy this one.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS: LA.**

* * *

The next morning Deeks packed up just what he needed to survive. It was enough things that they fitted into his car with his surfboard attached to the roof. That done he called to Monty and climbed inside. He didn't look back once as he pulled out into the LA traffic, didn't look back at the home he was leaving behind. He needed a fresh start, something different, something new.

He kept off the highways wherever possible, sticking the backroads and the ones that followed the coast as he drove. He had no destination in mind, no end goal, he just drove. He pulled over around midday, letting Monty out so he could have a run and do his business, but he didn't think to find himself some food. Instead he grabbed a bottle of water and drank it down as he watched the only companion from his former life he had kept enjoy his time outside of the car.

Once Monty was done it was back onto the road. Back to driving to nowhere. Back to the mindlessness of paying attention to only the immediate surroundings and others on the road. It felt good, not to have to think of anything other than that. It felt right for his mind to be focused only on the drive with no other thoughts pushing their way in. As the time turned towards evening Deeks found himself following a quite road which he knew would lead down to a beach, at some point. He knew that not because he had ever been there before, or because he had looked at a map. No, it was more the way it was slopping downwards and heading in the general direction of the sun. Well it seemed fitting in some way, for him to be following the sun. After all he had told Callen he wanted to walk in it, didn't he?

The road finally came to a stop in what looked to be a parking lot, though it didn't look like any you would see in LA. It was more a large area that was clear of obstructions, a couple of cars parked up on one side. Parking his car away from the rest Deeks climbed out, Monty following him swiftly as he looked towards the area the parking lot served. It was a very small cove, the sand of the beach completely deserted from what he could see. But that wasn't what had caught Deeks' eye. No that was the waves that were rolling in. They were the best he had seen in a long time. There must be something about the way the rocks circled that area of ocean that caused the swell, but right then Deeks didn't know or care about that. All that was in his mind was the wish to be out on those waves. To be one with the ocean, hoping to find peace away from others. It took him very little time to change into his wetsuit and grab his board, and leaving Monty by his towel on protection detail he ran into the surf. Letting it wash everything from his mind as he wrestled the waves and pull, trying to master the ocean in a way no one ever would.

It was exactly what he needed right then. Exactly what he had hoped to find when he had left LA, and for the first time in so long he found the enjoyment of being free. Found the enjoyment of being alive. It was the thing he had been searching for, and now, somehow in this long forgotten part of the west coast, he had found it. But that was not what was going through his mind. No, that was all about the swell and the next wave, the angles he would need to attack it at, and the complete joy he felt when he mastered the waters below him.

He stayed out until the sun set over the ocean. With the loss of light he felt the need to return to land. To return to Monty and get him settled for the night. With that in mind he climbed out, changing into his normal clothes as Monty ate the dinner he gave him. But once they were both done, Deeks realised he didn't want to climb back into his car and drive away. Didn't want to have to worry about finding a place to sleep that night. Didn't' want to return to civilisation. He knew he should. That was the right thing to do. But instead he grabbed a blanket from the backseat and made his way back towards the beach. It was only then he noticed the building built on the waterfront, whose lights were shining onto the sand. It looked like a restaurant or bar of some kind. It was a show that he wasn't completely alone in his discovery of this place. But there was no loud noises coming from inside, and it didn't seem an intimidating place. He was happy to share his peace with it. In fact he settled so that the lights from the windows shone on him and Monty on the beach, it saved him having to find wood in the dark for a fire after all. And at least the show of human presence would help keep the nightmares at bay, for a little while. He hoped. The darkness was not his friend right then.

He been sitting there, wrapped in his blanket with Monty sleeping at his side, for a while before he heard the distinctive sounds of sand shifting underfoot. He tensed, not knowing who was approaching and for a moment he wished he had his gun. Wished he had something to defend himself against the possible attack he was about to endure. But just as he thought that Monty's head rose as he stared towards the direction the intruder was coming from, his ears flattening against his head as he growled, and Deeks realised he didn't need a weapon. Monty would protect him in a way no other partner ever had because that was what he did.

"I mean no harm, I promise." Came a male voice through the dark, the speaker having stopped just short of them when he saw Monty's reaction. "My husband and I own the restaurant. Thought you could do with this." he continued, and that was when Deeks saw he had a couple of bottles of beer in his hands. Looking at them he realised he really could do with a drink right then.

"At ease, Monty." He said quietly, after taking a long look at the man approaching them. He was around the fifty mark if he had to guess, and had an air of one who had seen far too much in that life time. Though that didn't stop Deeks from using the signals he had once leant to make sure the dog would stay on alert.

"I'm Frank." The man said sitting down beside Deeks and offering one of the bottles to him. The unopened bottles Deeks noted gladly.

"Deeks." He replied, taking it.

* * *

Frank had watched the kid drive up earlier that day and go straight the ocean. It was an instinct he himself had always had, and in fact was the reason he and his husband Henry had brought this place, to be close to those waves. He had expected him and the dog to come inside once he was done, grab a meal, ask about places to stay in the area, the usual thing those that found their way to their bit of coast always asked. But the kid didn't, he was different. He instead settled onto the beach with a threadbare blanket and no fire. It didn't take a genius to realise he had something on his mind. It had been a slow night at the bar, and as such he had decided to offer his help, in any way he could. Once upon a time he wouldn't have bothered, but he had been where this kid was. Lost and alone, he knew how that felt. He wanted to make sure he knew there were people out there for him. It was for this reason he had grabbed a couple of beers, making sure to keep them unopened, as he made his way towards the stranger. He had stopped when the dog had growled at him, not wanting to get attacked. But when he saw the signals the kid gave the dog, he knew he had to gain this kids trust. It was time to pay back the saving of his own soul. Time to return the favour that had once been given to him.

Therefore he handed over the beer and purposely sat down on the same side as dog, so that it could attack if he did anything untoward. He wanted to show this kid he really wasn't an enemy. Needed him to see they were the same.

"So what's an LAPD officer doing out here?" Frank asked into the silence after they had both opened their bottles and taken a drink.

Deeks tensed once more at that sentence, trying to decide the best way of answering that question. Because in his mind only criminals ever asked things like that, not to mention how the hell this guy had known he was a cop, used to be a cop.

"There is nothing to fear, Deeks. I was with the LAPD 20 years ago. I remember the dog handling signals." Frank explained when he saw the caution in the other man's eyes. It told him more than it would civilian. It was a look he had only ever seen on those who spent their lives undercover. That was a hard gig for anyone to deal with, and he had known more than one cop burn out doing it, those that didn't end up dead at any rate.

"I'm not a cop. Not anymore." Deeks replied nodding his head at Frank's words. He looked like one of the old school, though he did have to wonder how a gay man had enjoyed being a cop 20 years ago. He doubted he had had a good time of it.

"So what are you now?" Franks asked, though not in accusation, but curiosity. As if it didn't matter to him what the answer was, it was just a passing wondering in his mind.

"Deeks, just… Deeks." Deeks replied. There was no other answer he could give to that one. I mean, he was nothing now. Or maybe it wasn't that he was nothing, but more he was trying to find his new place in the world. Yeah he liked that idea better than the other.

"Well, just Deeks. Why don't you come inside? Henry, my husband, is the best chef this side of LA. I'm sure he can whip you up something, and the dog's welcome in the bar." Frank responded with a quirk of his lips. He knew that feeling of complete loss of identity that came with leaving the force.

"Thanks, but I'm okay." Deeks replied not sure he wanted to enter the building not wanting to be subjected to society or people, or any of the expectations that came with such situations.

"Really? When was it you last ate?" Frank answered back as quick as you like. He had seen the guy was far too skinny when he was wearing his wetsuit earlier, and there was no way he was leaving him out here to starve. If nothing else Henry would have his hide if he did.

Of course those words got no response from the man at his side, and Frank knew he was going to need a different approach. Therefore staring out at the dark ocean he spoke once more, baring a part of his soul to the stranger at his side.

"Look I don't want to pry. Your life is your business. But I've been where you obviously are. I was lost and I tried to find the answer in the bottom of a bottle. It didn't work."

"You're the one that brought me a beer." Deeks replied, not being able to stop himself from pointing out the fact that rather than saving him from drinking himself to death, Frank was actually facilitating it.

"Touché." Franks responded with a nod. Deeks had him there.

At that Deeks turned to him in amazement before breaking out into laughter at hearing the word he so commonly spoke coming from another's mouth. But soon his laugh turned into something else, something desperate and aching. It was almost as if he couldn't stop, because he knew if he did he would break. And he couldn't break. He couldn't let it all come crashing down on him. He couldn't, that was why he left. He wanted to leave it all behind. He wasn't supposed to feel like this now. Though somewhere at the back of his mind, behind the laughter and desperation he realised that this was exactly why he had left. Because for the first time he actually felt, wherever he wanted to or not. Felt that he wasn't hollow anymore, even if it was causing him to break apart at the seams. He wasn't hollow and empty now.

He didn't even realise his laughter had turned to sobs that were wrenched from deep inside him until he felt Frank place his arm around his shoulder.

"It's okay kid. Let it all out. There is no one to judge you here." Frank said gently as he squeezed the other man's shoulders. He didn't know what he had been through, didn't know what it was that had caused him to leave the force. He just knew that he would be there for the kid, for as long as he needed it.

Finally Deeks found himself able to breathe, and then talk. Pulling out of the older man's arms he spoke softly, if somewhat surprised. "Oh, I needed that."

"Looked it. Where are you headed?" Franks asked not showing any sign of noticing how Deeks was wiping his face on his sleeve. He'd been there after all, he knew that somethings were much better out that in.

"No idea." Deeks responded honestly. There was no point lying about it. He had no plan after all, he had just run.

"We've got a spare room. Well actually it's a studio apartment above the restaurant. Used to be for our barman, but he moved with his girlfriend to LA last week. It's there if you want it." Frank suggested. This kid needed someone to care for him and he knew he and Henry could do it. He needed friends and he would be there for him. He understood him after all.

"I can't." Deeks replied instantly. The idea of stopping, of settling somewhere sent fear running through him. If he stopped then he could be found. Though who would be looking for him he had no idea.

"You don't have anywhere else to be, and here seems pretty good to me. Plus we could do with another hand around the bar, someone who can do the heavy lifting." Frank responded looking at the man next to him. He could see the fight or flight look in his eyes and he had to wonder just what it was that had caused him to run. But he had said he wasn't going to pry, and he meant it. When Deeks was ready to talk, he would listen then.

"What saved you?" Deeks asked changing the subject without thought. He had to wonder how this man had gone from your typical alcoholic cop, to being a gay restaurant owner. His curiosity was piqued by it.

"Henry, my husband. He found me drowning my sorrows in a back-ass joint and refused to leave me alone. still with me 20 years later." Frank replied with a soft smile at the man he loved with all his heart, the man he would follow to the ends of the earth if he asked him to. The man he owed so much and he knew he would never be able to repay.

"You're lucky." Deeks answered softly. It sounded so romantic, a lover saving the lonely cop, though he knew there would have been some serious hardships involved. Briefly he wished someone would have saved him the same way. His mind turned to Kensi before quickly turning away. She hadn't saved him, she had come and sent him up in a sting. She had left him there even after seeing what they had done to him. No she would never save him.

Frank saw the dark look cross the kids face, and he had to wonder at it. Was there someone back in LA that he loved but had left him? Was there someone there who had broken his trust? Was that why he was here, now? But whatever the answers to those question Frank knew now was not the time. So instead he spoke in a jokey tone, addressing Deeks words rather than the meaning and darkness behind them.

"I don't know, you haven't met Henry yet. He'll be force feeding you food and spoiling your Monty here within seconds. Be warned. He's a complete mother hen."

His words had the desired effect that they made Deeks chuckle at them. Made him feel lighter than he had in a long time as his mind pulled away from the dark thoughts, away from the memories of what had happened in the past and instead turned to a possible future.

"So coming in?" Frank asked, standing up and looking down at the man he had spent the good part of the last half an hour talking to. He wasn't sure what his answer was going to be, though he hoped it was a yes. But if it wasn't he was prepared to bring out the big guns. Or in other words send Henry out with some food and more blankets. He couldn't imagine anyone ever saying no to Henry, though he might be slightly biased about that one. Just slightly, what with being his husband and all.

Deeks thought for a moment, but he knew he really didn't need to. He'd liked talking to Frank. Liked the way it had made him feel… something good along with the bad. So really, there was only one answer he could give to that question. "Yeah. Yeah."

And with that Deeks stood, calling Monty to kneel as he followed the older man into the bar area of the restaurant. He didn't know if he was going to stay, didn't know what the future held. All he knew was that right then, right at that moment in time, this was the right decision for him. This was a place he wouldn't be judged, and nor would he feel the need to be someone he wasn't. No right here, he could be just Deeks, and for now, that was all he wanted.

* * *

 **QUESTION: do you guys want me to write only about Deeks journey, or do you want me to flit between this and what is going on in LA and with the team and Callen? Not sure which to do, so please let me know what you think. Thanks.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank** **lovepride, rozzy07, PirateGinge, Guest, GoldenEyes-65, Maria Luisa Illarnizzi, anonkp, Reader (Guest), Aim1107, Amy (Guest), Beststoriesever (Guest), Guest, CMT1992, Lic. Lu, Petunia3116, Guest, Guest, Ali (Guest), heyjode and Max and Fern 4ever** **for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So firstly I must apologise for my long absence, I fell down the stairs and bruised myself, making it rather difficult to sit at my desk and write. So sorry about that. Secondly from the answers I got from your reviews, I am going to continue with Deeks' story for now, but don't worry Callen will be coming in very soon and through him glimpses of the rest of the team, though they will probably play much more minor parts. I have been thinking about how I want to write this story and I think it is mainly going to be from Deeks pov, but those who have read my other stories know I can never go too long without including Callen. I also have a feeling this is going to become a long one, if I do what I'm thinking of doing. We'll see how it goes.**

 **Anyway enough yabba yabba, time to get on with the story. I hope you like this chapter, and I hope you like Henry.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS: LA.**

* * *

Deeks barely had time to take in the couple sitting in the corner of the bar, or the man sat at it, before his whole attention was taken by a man in his late forties wearing chef whites who stormed through the door bringing, what seemed to Deeks, to be a hurricane in his wake.

"And just where have you been, old man?" The man asked his hands going to his hips as he glared at Frank who was at Deeks' side.

"Just talking to Deeks here. He's gonna be stay with us a while." Frank responded a smile on his lips at his husband's dramatics.

"Oh, is he now?" Henry replied not even trying to hide the way he ran his eyes up and down Deeks' body when he turned to look at him. It seemed whatever he saw met with his approval though, because he nodded before addressing Deeks for the first time. "You like chicken?"

"Umm, yeah?" Deeks answered not sure what was going on, or why he was being asked that question. But before he could figure out how to find out more information, the other guy nodded and turned quickly going back through the door he had come in by. Deeks couldn't help but turn to Frank with a look that clearly said 'what the hell?' on his face.

"That was Henry." Frank answered the unasked question, a chuckle in his voice as he did so. Mainly because he knew exactly what his husband had gone to do, which was get Deeks some food. It seemed he wasn't the only one to notice he was far too skinny, not that he expected anything less from the man he loved.

"Right." Deeks replied not sure what else to say about his first meeting with this guy's husband.

"Hey, Rob. Tell me, how long was he watching us before we came in?" Frank asked the old man at the bar as he made his way round to the other side, pulling Rob another on tap beer without being asked. He knew his customers after all. He knew his husband would have noticed his absence and wanted to find out where and why he had gone.

"Since about a minute after you left." Rod responded taking the drink with a nod as he shared the information with the other man.

"Deeks meet Rob. He owns the farm behind us, and likes to come in for a tipple of a evening, don't you, Rob." Frank said to Deeks, directing him to take a seat at the bar while introducing him to one of their regulars. Rob had been coming to this bar long before he and Henry had taken over, and while it had taken a while for them to convince him that a gay couple could run a bar just as well as a straight one, he was now their staunchest supporter.

"Hmm, nice looking dog." Was all Rob said in way of greeting, having taken note of Monty who had curled up at the foot of Deeks' stool.

"Thanks." Deeks responded not sure what else to say to the glowering old guy. But it seemed that was enough as with a nod Rob went back to his beer, paying no attention to anything else in the room. Or at least that was what he liked everyone to believe at any rate.

Frank got Deeks another drink smirking as he did so. Because he, unlike the younger man, knew Rob had just given him the highest of compliments. The guy trusted his dogs above all humans from his experience, and for him to decide to accept Deeks on Monty alone, that was big.

They all fell back into silence after that. Frank going about his job while Deeks drank his beer and took in the bar he was in. It was not what he had expected from the outside. He had assumed this was some hole-in-wall type place that would be all dark corners and creaking wood. But inside it was fresh and inviting. The chairs and booths were all covered with a soft blue material, but it wasn't worn. It looked comfy, a place you'd want to sit. The windows were open and uncovered so you could hear the faint sound of the waves hitting the beach outside, and he could imagine the light the room would be bathed in in day time. It was unlike any bar he had ever been in, neither high end nor dive. It was… nice. A relaxed, easy-going, homely place that you'd happily come at the end of a hard working day or if you were passing by. He imagined the restaurant area would be the same. It reflected the men who ran it. Or at least one of them, he thought as the door to the kitchen crashed open once more and Henry walked purposefully over to him.

"Eat." Henry said, placing a plate piled high with chicken breasts marinated in some sort of sauce, surrounded by a collection of vegetables.

"I'm really not hungry." Deeks replied. But when he looked at Henry he saw a glare that would rival Hetty's in its intensity and as such found himself reaching for the cutlery. Of course when he had taken one bite he couldn't help but close his eyes and groan in pleasure before diving back for more. This was the best meal he had tasted in a very, very long time.

"Told you he was good, didn't I?" Frank said chuckling as he watched the kid clear the plate of food Henry had given him.

"Better than good. You are a god of food." Deeks mumbled between mouthfuls.

"Well, I can't deny the truth." Henry responded with an overdone smirk, though already ideas of experimenting with this new boy were crowding into his mind. He could have him try all the dishes Frank claimed he was far too old and set in his ways to taste. Oh yes, he couldn't wait to make him his Guinea-pig, and in doing so he would make sure he put back some meat on those bones of his. Deeks really did need fattening up in his mind.

"Easy, Henry. No plotting until he has agreed to stay." Frank said, interrupting Henry's thoughts of all the food he would subject Deeks to.

"Why wouldn't he stay? We're wonderful." Henry answered back with a shrug and wink to his husband. He didn't know why this kid was Frank's project, but he knew he was. And he would do nothing but support him.

At that Frank just chuckled again as Henry went back into the kitchen, both leaving Deeks alone as he ate and drank. They knew they needed to give him time to relax in this new place and come accustomed to his new surrounds.

Deeks for his part couldn't help but look on the obvious love between the two men with a fond expression. The care they had for each other, the understanding, it was like something he had never experienced before. It was refreshing in how they didn't try to hide it behind lies or subtle gestures. There was no undercurrent there. It was very much what you saw was what you got, and it was everything he needed it to be. He watched as Frank interacted with the customers, laughing at their jokes and telling some of his own. It was a peaceful sort of comradery he hadn't experienced since his time with Sidorov and his goons. And maybe even before then. Sam had never truly trusted him until he didn't give his wife away under torture, and as for Kensi, he didn't even know where to start to try and work out what had been going on there. It had all been so difficult. All he did know was that the idea of not having to deal with the tension and undercurrents of the team seemed like a blessing to him right then. It was only now that he had walked away that he had the ability to look back and realise he had never truly had the easy going friendly work atmosphere he saw in front of him. Only now did he truly see that he never had the ability to just be himself with the team. He knew that now. But as he sat there he had to wonder just who the real Deeks was. He had been playing the part of NCIS liaison for so long. Just who was the real him?

The bar closed down around Deeks without him truly realising. He was too caught up in the feelings of peace and safety he felt sitting at the bar drinking beer and scratching Monty's head. To caught up in not thinking and just being. So it was somewhat of a surprise to him when Franks plucked him out of his mind to the here and now.

"Hey, kid. Do you want to join Henry and me for a drink, or shall I show you your room?" He asked. He knew Henry wanted nothing more than to pump Deeks for answers to who he was and why he was there, but he also knew the kid wasn't ready for that. But he wasn't going to tell him what to do either way, he was just giving him the options.

Deeks for his part knew he didn't want to sit down with this guy and his husband. Sure they had been nothing but nice to him, but he wasn't ready to tell his story. Not yet. Therefore with a smile he looked at Frank in understanding at what he was offering, namely a way out of the integration. "The room sounds good."

"Follow me." Frank nodded, before leading Deeks and Monty towards the door Henry had come out of earlier. Entering Deeks saw that that it opened into the centre of a corridor with doors coming off going to the kitchen and restaurant dinning room. One end of corridor obviously led outside, while the other opened onto a set of stairs. Stairs which frank led them up. When they got to the upper floor Frank turned to the first door on the left.

"This is it. It's not much, but, it's enough." He said opening the door letting the younger man walk in without following him. "Mine and Henry's apartment is just down the hall if you need anything." He continued before closing the door, leaving the kid to settle himself him. Leaving him to get his bearings for this sudden change in his life.

Deeks looked around the room. Frank was right in the fact it wasn't much. The room contained a bed, one chair and a chest of drawers, upon which sat an old battered TV. Against one wall was a kitchenette area, complete with fridge, hob and sink. A door opened off the room to provide a toilet and shower. It was nothing like what he had left that morning. Nothing like the apartment he had walked away from without a backward glance. There was no personal touches here, just necessities. It was extremely basic. But Deeks couldn't help but think that basic was what he needed right then as he looked around. It had all he and Monty required of accommodation and it wasn't an impersonal motel room. That was given away by the star wars bedcover and matching pillow case. It was like the bar below, homely… if a little sparse.

Deeks moved towards the bed, going to kneel upon it so he could open the window and as soon as he did the room was filled with the smell of salt air and the sound of the waves crashing on the beach below. He knew that when the sun rose in the morning he would be facing the beach, he had taken note of every turn and direction they had taken to get there.

As he knelt there on the bed in a strange room listening to the sounds of the waves Deeks found a deeper sense of the peace he had been searching for, for so long. The sound of the waves was no longer some synthesized sound coming out of his tablet, there was no artificialness here. It was as far removed from his previous life as he could get, and sitting there, leaning on the windowsill Deeks couldn't help but realise it was everything he had wanted. It was so different from what he had left… he knew there was a possibility that here he could find what it was he was looking for. That in this place, so far removed from who he was and what had been, that here he might just find out exactly who Deeks really was. He might just find his lasting peace and place in the world.

It was with those thoughts that he lay down on the bed, pulling the cover around him and Monty as he drifted off into an easy sleep, for the first time since he had been taken.


	4. Chapter 4

**Hello my dears. I would like to thank** **Guest, heyjode, Guest, Petunia3116, Lic. Lu, Maria Luisa Illarnizzi, Aim1107, Amy (Guest), Max and Fern 4ever and Guest** **for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since I last updated. I also want to thank you all for your concerns and well wishes.**

 **So here is the next chapter, time to see how Callen is doing I think. I would also like to point out that as I live in the UK I know nothing of the American employment-tax system, so I could very well be making things up in this chapter. Anyway, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS: LA**

* * *

When Callen had thought Hetty and Bates would be unhappy about Deeks' resignation he had seriously underestimated their reactions, though he did think he preferred the yelling and curses that came from Bates as he heaped the blame for losing one of his best, upon Callen's head. The disappointed silent stare Hetty gave him was something he never wanted to experience again thank you very much. But they both had one thing in common when he told them, and that was to hand him all the paperwork the younger man needed to fill in to make it official. Why they thought he would be able to find Deeks he had no idea, but he didn't voice that opinion. Mainly because he knew if he did Hetty would start a manhunt for her missing detective while he knew Bates would expect him to use the full resources available to him as an NCIS special agent. And he really didn't want to involve the wonder twins, or the rest of the team. No it would be best to keep Kensi and Sam as far away from Deeks as possible for the foreseeable future, they were not impressed with his vanishing act, to put it mildly.

So that left Callen to look for him on his own and in his own time. The only good thing was that it seemed both Hetty and Bates were happy for him to take as long as he wanted. He imagined that was because they hoped the extra time would let Deeks heal, and come back. Callen for his part didn't see that happening, but hey at least they weren't breathing down his neck.

The first place Callen went when he finished work that evening after Deeks had left was the younger man's apartment. Getting no answer when he knocked, he let himself in by picking the lock. What he found was that not only Deeks but also Monty was missing, along with all the dog bowls and toys, and clothes and bath stuff for Deeks. So it was confirmed, the kid had skipped town. Callen let out a sigh as he looked around the empty apartment. Not because Deeks had gone, he was sure he needed it, no it was more because he doubted Deeks had been in the right frame of mind to sort anything out before he walked. He doubted very much that Deeks had made sure someone would be keeping an eye on the place, or that the rent would get paid on time. Another thing for him to deal with then. Fantastic. But even as Callen turned to make his way towards the apartment manager's rooms, it didn't once cross his mind to leave it be. Someone needed to watch Deeks' back, and if he couldn't do it in person, then he would do what he could to make sure his life was as easy as possible.

It was only half an hour later, and a couple of hundred lighter in the wallet, that Callen left Deeks' apartment building with the managers agreement that he would be the first one called if anything happened, or the rent wasn't paid. It had been surprisingly easy to get the guy to agree in actual fact, and Callen had made a mental note that if Deeks ever did return to LA, he was not letting him stay here. The guy was far too easy to persuade, though he guessed it could have something to do with the fact that the manager seemed to get it into his head that Callen was Deeks' boyfriend. An illusion Callen felt best not to dissuade the man of, though he did have to wonder just how many boyfriends Deeks had had for that to be the first thing that came to the other man's mind when he approached him. It also caused a lot of questions to be raised as well, questions Callen might just have to ask Deeks when he found him.

Back in the office the next morning Callen went about activity trying to find Deeks. He pulled up the traffic cam footage from across from his apartment building and watched as Deeks drove away, but he soon lost him as he headed out of LA. Callen knew that if Deeks didn't want to be found, he wouldn't be. But he had to try. Therefore he did a search of the motels in the direction he had last seen the kid heading, not expecting anything to come up. Which was good, considering it didn't. He then sat back and tried to decide what to do next. Oh he knew so far his searching had been half-hearted at best. Mainly because he felt Deeks deserved to disappear, and he didn't want to be the one to drag him back. But he did need him to sign the papers from NCIS and LAPD, especially if he got another job to tide him over while he was… wherever he was. It was then the idea came to him. He didn't really need to find Deeks until he officially got another job, right? Until then there would be no issues with tax or any of that. Therefore Callen quickly implemented a running background search on Deeks social security number, making sure it would alert him when it came up in relation to new employment. With that done he closed down everything else. He done all he was willing to do to find the kid, and he was sure that those who wanted him to do it, would approve of his rather lacklustre investigative skills on this case.

* * *

Deeks woke the next morning as the sun just started to peak over the fields behind the bar. And while it may not have been the longest he had ever slept uninterrupted by nightmares, it was the longest in a very long time. It had caused him to wake refreshed and ready for the day.

Climbing out of bed he called to Monty. He felt like going for a run in the bright morning, felt the need to be outside to greet the new day, and maybe, just maybe greet the new him. Therefore it wasn't much later he was slipping out of the back door, his sweats encasing his legs and a loose fitting tee over his chest.

Moving to start his run he turned away from the beach, he had done enough running along the sand in LA, and he didn't want anything to remind him of the life he had walked away from. Instead he headed towards the cliff path, using the steep climb to give his body a real workout. To really get his blood pumping and hopefully make sure his mind stayed at peace.

As he ran Deeks pushed his body to its limits, then tested to see if he could go any further. There were no attractive women to distract on this run. No, there was nothing but the sound of the ocean crashing below the cliffs, the smell of the grass under his feet, and the burn in his muscles. When he had first decided to run up the cliff path it had seemed deceptively short and gradual, but now he was half way up Deeks felt as if his lungs were on fire, and he was sure that he wasn't actually running anymore, just putting one foot in front of the other. But he didn't stop. Didn't think of anything but pushing through the pain. Of pushing through the discomfort he was putting upon his body. And soon nothing else mattered to him but making himself take the next step, to breath in the next gasp of air. He refused to quit. He was gonna make it to the top of this damn cliff if it killed him, which right then he thought was a definite possibility. In fact he was so focused on getting to the top one step at a time, that when it came he found himself surprised. He hadn't realised he was so close until he noticed how much easier it was to move now, how much easier it was to breathe.

It was only then did he allow himself to stop. To collapse onto the grass and stare at the sky above. And it was only then as he was drawing in ragged breaths, did he realise how pure the pain he had just inflicted upon himself was. Just how pure and… good it felt to force his body to do as he wanted it to do, even past what he had once believed was his accepted level of endurance. But then, he had recently been given a whole new lesson in what pain he could endure hadn't he? Torture did have a funny way of showing you just how far you can go, just how much you can take before you break. And there it was, the thing he had been trying so hard not to think about since walking out of the office the previous day. No, in fact he was pretty sure he had been trying not to think about it ever since it had happened, it was just that it was only the last 24 hours that had given him that freedom from the memories. He should have known it wouldn't last.

Pulling himself up into a sitting position Deeks found his eyes wandering towards the ocean below. Watching the way the waves would sweep in and sweep out again, leaving and taking things in equal measure. He let his breathing fall into sync with the sound of them crashing on the beach of the cove, and forced his mind to blankness. Forced it to think of nothing but the water below him, the sounds around him, the smell of the fresh air he was breathing in. Forced himself to register only the here and now, until the memories in his mind sank back down into the depths he wished they would stay. Oh he knew it probably wasn't healthy to repress it. No doubt it would all come flying out at some point, or at least that was what Nate had told him. But he didn't care. He didn't want to talk about it. Didn't want to see the look in people's eyes when he did. No all he wanted to do was forget. To pretend it never happened and move on with his life. He just wanted to live again, without fear or stress, or emptiness. Was that really too much to ask?

Deeks was pulled from his mind by movement on the beach below. Looking he saw someone leaving the bar, a surfboard under there arm. It took a few seconds for him to decide it was Frank rather than Henry, but once he had he settled down to see how well the older man would take the waves that were breaking and crashing down towards the beach.

A couple of minutes in he had to give the guy kudos for his skill. It was obvious to Deeks that Frank had been surfing all his life. It wasn't until Frank headed in that Deeks realised that from the moment he had seen the other man, he hadn't been plagued by the thoughts and memories he didn't want to have. In fact he had found a peace settle on him once more, the same one he had in the bar the previous evening, and had woken with that morning. He didn't know why, but something about Frank, and Henry, made him feel… safe. They made him feel free. It was a strange sensation, and certainly not one he was used to. But he liked it. It was at that exact moment that he knew that he didn't want to leave. This was where he needed to be right then. No, it was where he wanted to be right then.

With that decision clear in his mind he stood, making his way back to the beach and the bar. He had a job offer to accept after all.

* * *

A week after Deeks had walked out of the mission Callen was sitting at his desk when his computer pinged informing him that his search had come back with a result. It seemed Marty Deeks had gotten himself another job. Finding the address of the bar Deeks was working at Callen quickly rose to speak to Hetty. He needed to take a couple of days off if he was going to make it there and back. It was time for Marty Deeks to officially resign or return, the choice would be completely his, but either way, Callen was going to get a decision. Because while he understood why Deeks had run, there were things that needed to be done, situations that needed to be tied up, before Deeks could be completely free of LA and the life he had lived here. And it seemed it had become Callen's job to make sure he did just that.


	5. Chapter 5

**Hello my dears. I would like to thank** **Petunia3116,** **heyjode, Lic. Lu, Guest, fanncis, French fan (Guest), Adri1577, Max and Fern 4ever and ssl71** **for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So sorry about the long wait of this chapter, but I had my sisters hen do to go to, and it turned out to be a bit messy. Anyway here is the next chapter I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS: LA.**

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Callen climbed out of his car, placing his weapon in its holster as he looked around. At first he thought his GPS had gone wrong somewhere when it had directed him down a little used road to a seemingly empty cove, though the waves were amazing. But then he saw the building built right on the beach, and he couldn't help but shake his head even as a smile graced his lips. Only Deeks would be able to find work in a bar that opened onto a surfers dream. Oh yeah, if he had ever had to consider where he thought would be Deeks dream destination, this place came damn close. Standing in the parking lot he breathed in deeply, tasting the salt in the air, as well as the freshness that you never got in LA. It was peaceful and beautiful, and eased something inside of him. He had been worried when he discovered Deeks was working a bar that it would be shady rundown joint in some dodgy part of some crummy town. But this… this was perfect for the man who had walked away from everything in LA. It was so different to life there, and Callen was sure that if Deeks could find what he was looking for anywhere it would be here. He hoped so at any rate.

With one more scan of the beach area he turned towards the bar. It was time to find the missing detective, make sure he was really okay, and see what he wanted to do with his future.

* * *

Frank stood behind the bar watching the expensive Merc pull up into the parking lot. That was not the sort of car that came round their way often, and as such he paid careful attention to the driver. It was for this reason alone that he saw him slip a gun in the back of his jeans. That action alone made him weary of him. Who was this guy that he felt the need to carry here? And who was he looking for? Because there was no way he had just stumbled across their bar. Looking again at the car he saw the LA licence plates and put two and two together to get four. He had a feeling this guy was here for Deeks. He didn't know why the kid had run, but he knew it wasn't good. And if there was a guy looking for him carrying a gun, well not good really didn't do it justice in his mind. As such he made sure that he was at his most watchful when the man in question entered the bar and after a look around headed straight for him.

"Hi, I'm looking for Marty Deeks?" Callen said to the barman having taken note that the man he was looking for wasn't in the bar.

"Don't know who that is." Frank responded in a casual tone, making sure he didn't do anything obvious to show the man who was asking that he was lying. He knew the tells from his time on the force, there was no way he was going to give away Deeks.

Callen looked the older man in the eyes and knew he was lying. And that was not because of the fact that he knew Deeks worked here, but more the almost militant defence he had of the kid he was looking for. Only Deeks could commander that sort of loyalty in the week he had been gone. Therefore relaxing his stance and putting on his friendliest smile he spoke once more.

"Let's start again. I'm Special Agent G Callen, NICS, I worked with Deeks. Do you know where he is?" Callen asked pulling out his badge to show the other he meant no harm.

"Nope." Frank responded without hesitation. He wasn't even lying. Deeks had gone off on one of his afternoon runs with Monty, the kid could be anywhere right then. Plus having a badge meant nothing in his mind. Those in law enforcement were just as bad as those out, if not sometimes worse in his experience.

"Then I guess I'll just have to wait." Callen replied before ordering a beer and carrying the bottle over to a table where he could watch every entrance and exit, as well as the people in the bar. He had come here to see Deeks, and he would, whether the guy at the bar liked it or not. Though the idea that he would defend Deeks from him made his hackles rise. It had been his job as team leader to keep Deeks safe for the last three years, so what did this guy want with his team member?

Frank watched the agent walk away. Watched how he chose the one seat in the place that gave him the perfect angle of everything in the bar without thought. The way Agent Callen moved… it gave off an air danger to Frank. He knew his type of old. He was one son of a bitch he wouldn't want to meet in a dark alley that was for sure, and certainly not someone you wanted to cross. He was like a panther waiting to strike, playing nice until it time to close in for the kill and then you would be dead before you even knew what hit you. What he didn't know was what the guy wanted from Deeks. Was him being here for Deeks good or not? And he had no way of answering that question until the kid came home. Therefore all he could do was wait and watch warily as the predator stalked his bar and the one he had taken under his wing.

* * *

Deeks came back from his afternoon outing with Monty, and rather than go to him room he headed straight for the bar. They hadn't gone for a run, just a causal walk along the cliffs so he had no need to change, and he felt let having a chat with Frank before he started his shift. With that in mind he pushed open the door, but before he could say a word Frank was there standing in from of him as if shielding him from something.

"Frank, what ya doing?" He asked quizzically even as Monty made his way around the older man and moved into the bar.

"There's man here who's asking for you." Frank responded, not sure what to do as Monty had already moved past him. Hmm, maybe he should have tried to stop the dog, but he never seemed to leave Deeks side, so it hadn't even crossed his mind.

"Okay, who?" Deeks asked bending to look over Frank's shoulder. Though what he saw made him realise he really didn't need the other man to answer that, considering what he saw was Callen rubbing Monty's head. "Yeah, forget that. He's okay."

"You sure?" Frank asked even as he stepped aside and turned to see how Monty was treating their dangerous guest.

"Yeah. He's… a friend." Deeks responded though there was uncertainty in his voice as he said the words. He wasn't sure if friend was the right description for his former team leader, but he did know he wasn't a threat. Whatever Callen was for, it wasn't to cause him harm. With that he moved towards the other man. Time to find out why the hell he was here.

"Callen." He said stopping in front of the other man and therefore pulling his attention away from Monty. Not that Deeks was fooled for a minute that the senior undercover agent of NCIS hadn't been completely aware of his approach, he had no doubt noticed him as soon as he came into the bar. After all he was in the one seat Deeks usually preferred for the fact he could see every exit and entrance from it.

"Deeks." Callen responded pulling his attention from the dog now lying at his feet to run his eyes over the detective, or former detective, standing in front of him what he saw made a small smile appear on his face. Gone were the dark shadows under his eyes, and the haunted look he had the last time he had seen had receded somewhat. Yeah this place was good for Deeks. "You're looking well."

"I'm good." Deeks replied before siting so he was across from Callen, but they were both still able to see every part of the bar they were in. "What you doing here?" He asked deciding not to beat around the bush. He could only think of one reason Callen would come and that was to drag him back, he was just surprised he was alone. And he was alone, Deeks had made sure of that as he walked towards the other man. The rest of the team were not here.

"Well if you ask Hetty or Bates I'm here to drag you back to LA kicking and screaming so they can lock you up until you agree to come back to work." Callen responded. He wanted Deeks to know that his resignation had not been taken lightly. Not because he wanted to cause guilt or worry in the younger man, more he wanted him to realise just how valued he was.

Deeks looked at Callen at his words. He heard what he was saying, but that wasn't what he had asked. He knew he was leaving a shit storm behind him when he left, but he really didn't care about that. No. He wanted to know why the man he had handed his gun and badge to was sitting in the bar he now worked that.

"I asked why **you** were here." He replied steadily, determined to get the answer. Because he had trusted Callen to keep him hidden. Okay sure he may not have thought about it until now that he was confronted by the man, but his parting words, that there was always room on the team for him, he'd thought Callen would have his back in this. So why was he here now?

"I'm here to give you the choice. You can return with me, or resign officially from the LAPD, and effectively NCIS as well." Callen responded with a shrug, leaning back against his seat, his eyes fixed solely on Deeks, though the both knew he saw everything else that was happening around them just as Deeks did as he returned the stare.

"I'm pretty sure that when I gave you my badge and gun I made that decision clear." Deeks answered. He had made his decision. He wasn't changing it. He needed out, and what he had found here, it was more than he had ever had.

"Yeah. I have the paperwork in my car for you to sign." Callen agreed. He knew as soon as he had pulled up into the parking lot of this bar that there was no way he was going to entice Deeks away. And that was before he was confronted with the protective papa bear routine from the man behind the bar.

"Good." Deeks responded with a smile as something inside him relaxed. He had been right he could trust Callen to have his back.

"Of course there other things we need to talk about." Callen replied picking up his beer and taking a swig as he watched the confused frown cross Deeks face. He wondered whether he should wait until the former detective joined the dots and worked out what he was talking about or if he should put him out of his misery. Though a swift look at the guy at the bar who was glaring at him at the look on Deeks' face he decided the latter would be better if he didn't want to get thrown out on his ass. "Your apartment. I doubt the pay of a barman can cover an LA rent, and there is no way I'm paying that indefinitely. So what do you want to do with all you stuff?" He asked curiously.

The first thing that came to Deeks mind at those words were "I prefer mixologist." Then the part where Callen was willing cover his rent registered. "You don't have to pay it. I'll give in my notice."

"And your things?" Callen asked more insistently. Because that apartment was still full.

"Throw it out." Deeks responded with a shrug. He had left LA. He'd left his life behind. He didn't need anything to remind of what had been. He was starting a new life, with a new him. He had all he needed here.

"Don't throw away your memories, Deeks. Take it from me, a day will come when you wished you had more than duffle bag filled with clothes." Callen replied quietly, seriously. For all he owned his own home, he still only had only a duffle bag and his bedroll to show that he had been there. His only mementoes of his life fitted into a tea box he had on his mantel. He wouldn't wish that on anyone.

"What can I do with it? It won't fit here, and if I can't afford an LA apartment as sure as hell can't afford a storage unit." Deeks responded with a sigh. He knew what Callen was saying. He knew how the man in front of him had nothing, but that didn't mean he needed to keep what he did have. Right?

"I have an empty garage. You can store it there. And any furniture that won't fit, I'm sure I can find place for in the house. Hell Sam would be happy to have a couch to sit on when he comes round for a beer." Callen responded with a chuckle, as offering his own home as a storage space was more of an advantage to him that it was to Deeks.

Deeks didn't buy it for a minute. He could see what Callen was offering him. It wasn't just somewhere to store his stuff. He was offering him somewhere he would always be welcome. Somewhere that if he ever needed it, he could call home. But he knew better than to call the other man on it. Therefore he smirked as he replied, "Oh, so you just want free furniture for you house."

"You bet." Callen responded returning the smirk, but even as he did they both knew some unspoken agreement had just formed between the two of them. Or maybe it had always been there. Maybe they had always had this connection even, when they were the team member and team leader. Maybe it was just that it was only now that it was just the two of them they were finally letting that connection show. Maybe now there was no Sam or Kensi or team dynamics in-between them they were finally finding a deeper bond from the one they had shared when they worked together.

It was that moment the two were interrupted by Frank bringing over a beer for the both of them. He wanted to make sure Deeks was okay, though it seemed everything was going fine. But he better than anyone, knew that appearances could be deceiving. And he couldn't get out of his head how Deeks had hesitated when he had said the agent guy was his friend.

"Frank, let me introduce you to Agent Callen, my former team leader when I was liaison officer for NCIS and LAPD." Deeks said to his new friend. He wanted them to get along. They were the only two people who seemed to give a damn about him right then, the only two who seemed to have his best interests as heart. And really that made they the only true friends he had.

"Agent Callen." Franks nodded. He was highly intrigued by the idea that Deeks had been liaison to NCIS. The only team he knew that worked out of LA were the special ops group. If the kid had worked with them, then he had seen even more than most undercover cops ever would.

"Detective Monroe. Pleasure to meet you." Callen responded with a smile though he had glint in his eyes as he spoke the man's previous title. He wanted Frank to realise that he was not someone to mess with, and if he hurt Deeks in any way he would come for him.

"Its former detective." Frank responded narrowing his eyes at the agent in front of him. But looking into his eyes he saw what he was doing and why he was doing it. He wanted to protect Deeks just as he did. He could accept that, though the look he gave back as he continued carried the same message. "Good to meet you to. I'll let my husband know Deeks has a friend staying for dinner."

With that the two men shared a nod and Frank went back to the bar, and to inform Henry they would have another for dinner that night. He wanted to get to know Agent Callen better, and he couldn't see him leaving until he knew Deeks was in safe hands. It was a win win for the both of them, and he Callen knew just as he did.

As soon as Frank was out of hearing range Deeks turned to Callen. "Did you really have to run a background check on my employers?" he asked in an exasperated tone.

"Yep." Callen responded without any contrition. Deeks was still a member of his team in his mind it was his job to look out for him, and that included making sure he was working for decent people. He didn't see any issue with what he had done, and if Deeks did, well tough. He was just going to have to get used to it.

At that Deeks shook his head and rolled his eyes but he knew deep down that the idea that Callen had cared enough to do that, it gave him a warm feeling inside. A feeling he hadn't had for a very long time. One of knowing that someone cared. And it was a feeling he wouldn't give up for the world, no matter how many background checks Callen did.


	6. Chapter 6

**Hello darlings. I would like to thank** **anonkp, Lic. Lu, ssl71 and Guest** **for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS: LA.**

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Callen placed his knife and fork together on the now empty plate. That had to have been one of the best meals he had ever eaten. Frank's husband was a genius chef, even if he did give him a death glare that rivalled Hetty's when he brought out the food for him and Deeks. That look made him chuckle as he realised that Henry was actually the more dangerous of the two Deeks now worked for. Because while Frank was a former cop, Callen was pretty sure that Henry would, without hesitation, poison you if you so much as looked at someone he cared about wrong. Say the wrong thing to either Frank or Deeks and he would be dead. He didn't know how Deeks had found himself such a protective couple to take him in, but he was glad he had. Glad he had these men to look after him, to help him find what it was he was looking for. Glad he was settled somewhere with people like Frank and Henry around him.

Callen was pulled from his thoughts by Deeks speaking, for the first time since the food arrived.

"Well, I guess I'd better go get ready to start my shift." He said, smiling happily at the idea. He liked working behind the bar, talking to the regulars and entertaining them with his antics. Since starting the job he had decided he wanted to be like Tom Cruise in Cocktail, though Frank had forbidden him to throw around the bottles of spirits they had behind the bar. He was no fun. But hey, that didn't mean Deeks couldn't practise with the empties when the bar was quiet now did it? He had even nearly caught one yesterday and everything.

"And I'd better head back to LA. Get this lot filed before Hetty or Bates finds out." Callen agreed, patting the now signed paperwork at his side. He wasn't looking forward to the backlash that he knew would be coming his way once it was processed and everything was official.

At that Deeks frowned. It was already early evening, and he knew how far it was back to the city. There was no way Callen would make it back before midnight at the earliest. And he really shouldn't be driving after the beers he had had. Therefore without thought, he spoke. "Why not stay the night?"

"Where? Last I checked there wasn't a motel around, and I really don't fancy sleeping on the beach or in my car." Callen replied simply. It wasn't like there was any other option of where he could crash now was it? He doubted Frank and Henry would be too happy to lend him their couch after all.

"My beds big enough for two, as long as you don't mind fighting Monty for the space." Deeks responded without thinking through the words coming out of him mouth. It seemed the obvious solution to him.

Callen on the other hand couldn't help the many things that went through his mind at that suggestion. The main one being what exactly Deeks meant by it. Was he just offering a friend somewhere to sleep?... Or was it possible he was offering something more? The building manager of Deeks' apartment blocks words came back to him then, asking if he was Deeks' boyfriend. Was the other man offering something like that? Because if so… well Callen wasn't sure what his answer would be. Sure, he thought Deeks was cute, he always had done. Academically he had always accepted the kid was extremely attractive, he just never considered he had a chance with him. He still didn't if he was being honest. Which made him think that if Deeks was offering something more than just a place to sleep for the night, it was more because of the trauma he had been through, than he actually wanted to be with Callen that way. In which case Callen knew he would have to turn him down, however much he really didn't want to.

But he was jumping completely ahead of himself. First he needed to find out exactly what it was Deeks was offering him, and he needed to do it in such a way that there was no awkwardness attached to it. This would take some finesse… or he could fall back on the age old ribbing he had team had once done to the younger man on a daily basis.

"Is this your way of trying to get me into your bed, Deeks?" He asked with the raise of an eyebrow and a smirk on his lips.

A look that made Deeks roll his eyes as he replied, "no."

"Really? Because your building manager seemed to be under the impression I was your boyfriend." Callen returned, slipping in the information to see what reaction it would cause in the other man.

What?! No. I'm not… I don't think… you and me… I…" Deeks spluttered not sure what to say to that sentence. He instinctive gut reaction was to say that he didn't like guys, but he knew that would be a lie. A lie the old Deeks told everyone he worked with. He didn't want to lie about that side of himself anymore, but he had no idea how Callen would take that declaration. I mean they had never really been close, telling him he was Bi would probably be a bit too much information. Then there was the idea of him and Callen together. A thought that had never crossed his mind before. But now that it had he couldn't help but admitting the older man was sexy, the way his eyes could sparkle as well as smoulder… Yeah, okay, enough thinking about Callen's eyes, it probably was not a good idea right then. He needed to work out what he was going to say.

Callen saw the conflict going on in the other man and decided to, hopefully, reassure some part of it. Therefore he smiled as he said, "you should probably finish at least one of those sentences, Deeks. It doesn't matter to me who you sleep with, as long as you enjoy it. I never let gender get in my way."

"You don't?" Deeks asked his eyes going wide at what those words implied. At what Callen was saying without hesitation.

"No, why should I? If I like someone I like them. What does it matter if they're male or female?" Callen responded with a shrug. Okay sure, he may not talk about it at work, but he never hid his sexual orientation either. He was who he was, and if people didn't like it, then that was their problem. He had long gotten rid of the need to please others, a childhood of rejection did that to you he found.

"It doesn't." Deeks replied sitting back still slightly astonished that Callen had just come right out and said that. It was something he had always believed, but it was also a truth he had to hide throughout his career in law enforcement. Cops that were different did not last long, no matter how much the powers that be talked about diversity and inclusion.

"Exactly." Callen answered with a smile, enjoying watching how Deeks mind was turning around the idea of being open and about who he really was. How his mind was trying to process this new idea that it was okay to be himself completely. Watched as a new aspect of the new Deeks unfurled before his very eyes.

Finally Deeks nodded to himself before turning to address the sentence Callen had spoken that started this whole conversation. "Okay. Well, yeah I may swing both ways, but the reason the apartment manager thought you were my boyfriend is probably because I told him I had one to stop him trying to set me up with his niece."

Callen couldn't help but laugh at that. The idea of Deeks coming up with a fictional boyfriend just to get the guy of his back, he could totally see him doing that. No doubt he had spun in great detail how much he loved his fictional partner, describing him down to the last detail. Though that last did make him wonder what the hell Deeks had said to make the manager think he was said boyfriend. But that was for another time, or at least a late night drunken conversation.

"As for your suggestion, No I am not trying to get you into my bed. But hey, if you find your way into it on your own, I wouldn't kick you out." Deeks continued with a flirtatious wink at Callen which just made him laugh even harder and no, he did not spit beer out of his nose, no matter what Deeks said about it.

Deeks for his part couldn't help but let his usual sunny smile split his lips as he watched him. The worry and tension he had felt at Callen's original words disappearing in an instant. Back came the friendly comradery they had shared so far that evening.

"Okay, I'll stay." Callen replied when he had finally gotten himself under control enough to not laugh and instead return the smile. He liked this new relationship him and Deeks had. Liked the way there was nothing standing between the two of them being friends, not work, their positions in the team, their partners or anything else that always seemed to be there when they were in LA. Yeah he liked this a lot.

* * *

Callen spent the rest of the night sitting at the bar, watching as Deeks played the customers like the strings on a violin. He watched him trying to juggle the lemons for a couple girls who came in, hair wet from the ocean. Watched as he had a one sided conversation with the old man at the end of the bar, both seemingly fine letting him ramble on. Watched how he interacted with Frank when he came to get drink orders from the restaurant next door. And through it all he noticed how Monty seemed to split his time from sitting by the end of the bar watching Deeks work behind it, or by his side as he moved around the room collecting glasses and cleaning tables. It seemed the dog did not like the idea of letting his master out of sight, but he was also trained enough to know he was not allowed behind the bar.

This lead Callen to only one conclusion, and that was that Deeks was not as okay as he seemed. He trusted Monty's judgment on the younger man, he was the only one who could truly see behind all those masks he wore. Therefore if Monty thought Deeks needed him close, then no doubt he did. Callen was mulling this over when the stool next to him became occupied.

"So, Agent Callen, what do you think of our bar then?" Frank asked the man as he sat down with a beer in hand. The restaurant was closed for the night now, and his work currently done. As such he had decided to come and keep Deeks' former team leader company. He wanted to find out more about the man.

"It's nice. I can see why Deeks likes it here so much." Callen responded absently looking round the bar before his eyes returned to the younger man, a small smile appearing on his lips as he watched him trying to flip empty spirit bottles, and failing miserably.

"Do you know why he left?" Frank asked his eyes also on the younger man, wincing slightly as the bottle fell to the floor, though luckily without smashing. When would the kid learn he wasn't Tom Cruise?

"I do." Callen replied, but refused to say anything more. If Deeks wanted Frank to know, he would tell him. Callen wasn't going to sharing his secrets.

Frank looked at the man next to him and waited, but when the silence stretched without another word from Callen he knew he wouldn't get anything more. And he had told Deeks he wouldn't pry, therefore he decided to ask something else. Something he hoped the agent next to him would answer. "How'd a member of LAPD end up working with NCIS?"

"Our boss wanted him for an agent, not that he ever signed the paperwork. Guess it was second best in her mind." Callen replied smirking at the thought of Hetty. Deeks had to be the only person who had ever not done what she wanted, and now he had done it twice by signing his resignation paperwork.

Frank thought about that response for a moment before deciding to see what other information he could get from the man next to him about the one they both cared for. He wanted to make sure his hunch about what Deeks used to do was correct. "Bet he was good at undercover." He said causally, watching Callen out of the corner of his eye and therefore not missing the smirk that crossed his lips at his leading statement.

"He still is." Callen responded with a nod of his head to Deeks who was now charming a couple who seemed to have taken a wrong road somewhere and ended up at the bar. He easily got them relaxed enough to tell him there life stories, as well as where they were trying to get to.

"That he is." Frank agreed, and not for the first time he had to wonder who the real Deeks was. Watching him behind the bar day after day for last week had shown him how easily the kid fell into a part. How easily he became what those he was talking to expected him to be. The way he read people without thought was remarkable, and a trait Frank knew couldn't be learnt. He had to wonder if the Deeks he and Henry saw was the real him, or if it was just another mask, Deeks playing what he thought they wanted. And looking back at the man next to him he had to wonder if Callen felt the same, or if maybe he knew who the kid was underneath it all.


	7. Chapter 7

**Hello my lovelies. I would like to thank** **Petunia3116, anonkp, PirateGinge, heyjode, Lic. Lu, Guest, Aim1107 and Max and Fern 4ever** **for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, it's a long one and filled with quite a bit of angst.**

 **ATTENTION: This is probably not for Kensi fans, though I have tried to keep it within character while also within the changes I made for this story. I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS: LA.**

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The bar was closed, everything cleaned down and the takings recorded. It was at this point of the night that Frank, Henry and Deeks would usually sit down a share a quiet beer relaxing and unwinding after a day at work. That night was no different, except that they had an added member to their group. Callen had helped Deeks close up the bar leaving Frank to sort out the money side of things. As such it was the four of them that sat down at the end of night, to relax, and for the couple to get to know the man who they had never heard of before, but seemed to be a part of Deeks' life.

Frank for his part, after the talk with Callen earlier, gave him a guarded respect. He knew he was here with the best of intentions towards Deeks, but Henry had not had the chance to gain that knowledge. All he knew was what Frank told him, and well, if this wasn't a perfect opportunity to find out more about Deeks' situation he didn't know what was. It would also give him a chance to gauge agent Callen's reactions to how Deeks responded to his questions. Therefore effecting ignorance Henry turned to the new member of their group to ask a question he hoped would open up a chance to discuss just who Callen was to the younger man, who he had been, and who he was going to be in the future.

"So, you Deeks' partner then?" He asked casually taking a sip of his beer, making sure not to take his eyes of the man who was sitting across from him.

"No." Callen replied simply, meeting Henry's eyes without hesitation. He could stare down Hetty, Henry was easy for him.

Henry heard Callen's reply and watched him, but got nothing, from him at any rate. What surprised him was the words coming out of the kid they had taken under their wing at his question.

"Thank god." Deeks muttered quietly, though not quiet enough that no one heard it. In fact all the men there heard his words and that piqued the interest of his new employers while causing a frown to appear on Callen's face.

"Deeks?" Callen asked wondering what that was about. Did he not want him to be his partner? Okay, he had never considered the idea of him and Deeks as partners, but he didn't think it was a completely terrible idea if it had ever happened. But it seemed Deeks did. That hurt more than he thought it would. The idea that Deeks didn't trust him to have his back. Surely with him resigning he had proved he could do that, right?

Deeks looked over at Callen when he heard the way he said his name, as if it was question. It was then he saw how his words had been interpreted. Which was so not want he had meant by them. Therefore he addressed his former team leader, correcting the miscommunication that had happened, though even as he did so he couldn't keep the growl from his voice at the words.

"Not you, her."

Callen raised his eyebrow at that, wanting more from Deeks, needing him to explain exactly what he meant by not just those words the tone he had spoken them in. He had been under the impression that there was an attraction between Kensi and Deeks, a budding relationship developing there before it had all gone wrong. So much so that he was in fact surprised the guy hadn't asked after her at all since he'd been there. So what did he mean by that?

Deeks signed when he saw that look. He really didn't want to talk about this, hell he didn't even want to think about it, but he knew he had to give Callen an explanation. The man deserved that considering all he was doing for him.

"She left me Callen. I thought she was coming to rescue… but instead she set me up." He responded his voice breaking as he remembered the pain he felt when he realised Kensi wasn't there to save him from the pain and literal torture he had endured. He didn't want to be thinking about this. He wanted this conversation to stop. Wanted that to it, the end, but one look at his former team leader's eyes and knew he wasn't going to get his wish.

"That wasn't her decision to make, Deeks. She was following orders." Callen replied carefully. He didn't want to upset the other man. He knew he had been through a lot, but he still felt the need to defend a member of his team. Felt the need to say the words so Deeks could hear them. Of course they were the wrong ones to say.

"It doesn't matter." Deeks shouted standing quickly as his breathing started to become erratic and his eyes darted around wildly as if he was back there again. Remembering it all in clear detail once more, something he had tried so hard not to do. But to hear Callen defend her… it was too much. It all came rushing back to him. The memories were crowding into his mind blotting out all else. The metallic smell of blood returned to him, and he could once again taste it in his mouth as his tongue unconsciously pressed against the scars he still had from where the drill had entered. He couldn't take this. He couldn't do this. Not now, not ever. He didn't want this. It was too much. With that he turned to walk out the bar without even looking at those he had been drinking with.

"Deeks!" Frank shouted standing to follow as he saw the kid stagger towards the door, his hand going to his mouth in a gesture he had never seen before and didn't understand. All he knew was Deeks was upset and he didn't want him running off on them. He needed to stay where they could keep him safe, where they could help him.

"No. I can't do this. Not now, not ever." Deeks muttered through the hand he was holding over his mouth as if he wanted to vomit. And a part of him did at the remembered taste of blood and pain that was currently going through him. He needed to get out. Go outside, everything would be better then. Get away from people, get away from the memories. Drown himself in the sounds of the ocean. He needed out.

Callen hadn't stood as he watched. He knew what was going through Deeks' mind. Because unlike the other two men there he knew what he had been through. He had seen his medical reports and knew the extent of the injuries that had been inflicted upon him. But like Frank he also did not want Deeks running away from them. Not now. Not when he had found a place that would be good for him, a place he could recover from all that had gone before. Therefore using his team leader voice, a tone that he knew the younger would not refuse to respond to, because he had been trained for the last four years to do just that, he said only one thing. "Deeks."

The reaction was instantaneous as Deeks stopped and turned to Callen, looking only at him as he spoke. "I can't tell them, Callen."

"I know." Callen replied, and he did. He understood in way no one else did, of that Deeks was sure. Therefore he made a decision. He couldn't tell them, couldn't form the words that would be needed to talk about the memories he tried so hard to repress. He couldn't do it. But Frank and Henry deserved to know.

As such Deeks took a deep breath and then he spoke.

"You do it?" He whispered, though it came out more as a question than a statement. The idea of Frank and Henry knowing… he knew it was the right thing, but that didn't make him feel any better about it. He had wanted to leave this all behind in LA, but he had known he wouldn't be able to. At least this way he wouldn't have to see their faces as they heard it all. And he knew he could trust Callen to only give the necessary details. He trusted him to only tell them the bare essentials.

Time seemed suspended in that moment for Deeks as he looked into Callen's eyes, watched the thoughts and understand flitter through them. But then the older man nodded and time rushed to start again. As soon as he saw that, Deeks moved out the door, Monty at his kneels as always. He couldn't be around to hear what Callen said, but conversely he didn't want to go too far away from people. Didn't want to be completely on his own right then. Therefore he moved to sit on the steps, listening to the waves pounding on the beach below and being soothed by the soft murmur of voices behind him. As long as he didn't think about what they were saying they were a comfort. So he sat and waited, and let himself relax, matching his breathing to waves once more as he forced his hand from his mouth and made himself swallow the taste he knew wasn't really there. Instead he spent the time as Callen talked pushing his psychosomatic reactions back into the box he had created in his mind. He just wished there was a way to lock it and throw away the key forever.

* * *

Callen waited until Deeks was out of hearing range before he started, though he didn't once remove his eyes from the doorway as he spoke. He needed to make sure Deeks was okay, and the best way to do that was to watch out for if Monty returned without him. So no, Callen wasn't going to look away from the last place he had seen the pair.

"We were running a joint op with another agency. One of ours in, and one of theirs. Deeks was overwatch for our man, Sam. His partner Kensi overwatch for the other agent. Sam got made, they nearly killed him. Deeks went in without thought to save him. In doing so, they both got caught. They were tortured. Him and Sam, the target wanting to know if the other agent was an agent. When the team located them Kensi went in with the assistant director with the aim of using the two inside as a way to confirm the other agents cover. Therefore rather than rescuing them, they set them up on a sting so that the agent could 'kill' them, and therefore prove her loyalty. When the bodies were left for dead the team went in and extracted them." He explained quietly. His tone of voice was calm and almost casual, it was enough to send a shiver up Frank's spine to hear the words he was speaking said in such a tone. Almost as if Callen was hoping that if he said them like that the impact of them would be lessened. That they wouldn't register what he was saying and instead hear something else. He had never heard anyone speak like that before about such horrific things, and Frank knew he never wanted to hear it again.

In the quiet that followed Callen's monologue only one question came to Frank's mind. And it was question he knew he had to voice.

"Where were you while he was getting tortured?" He asked, trying to keep his own tone as calm as Callen's, though he knew he had failed. He knew that his protective side had come out in the way it growled through him, almost as in accusation that it was Callen's fault, what Deeks had been through.

"I was with an… asset. I wanted to be there. It should have been me watching over Sam, he is my partner. But I had to run operation." Callen replied finally tearing his gaze away from the door to turn to Frank. The look in his eyes tore at Frank's heart. This man in front of him took complete blame for what had happened to the kid, as all good team leaders should. Deeks was under his care and it had gone horribly wrong. And Frank had no doubt that the outcome had caused the man beside him countless sleepless nights. At least that explained his protectiveness towards the kid. He thought he had failed him then, and he was trying his hardest to make up for it now.

"How bad was it?" Frank asked, his tone much gentler this time. He needed to know what they were dealing with here. Needed to know the extent of recovering Deeks needed to get better. Needed to know that there was a still a chance that he would.

"It was torture Frank, how bad do you think it was?" Henry interrupted shocked by the question from his husband. Torture was torture, right? There wasn't a scale you could rate something like that against. It was torture.

Callen choose to ignore Henrys interruption and responded to Franks question the only way he felt comfortable doing. He wasn't going to reveal any of the details, they didn't need to know them. All they needed to know was, "it was bad."

At that Frank nodded. Bad, okay. That wasn't the worst, but it wasn't the best either. It was somewhere in the middle. He could work with that. There was a way back for the kid from bad.

"I'll go talk to him." He said, moving to stand once more, only to find himself stopped by a strong grip on his arm, making him turn to Callen with a raised eyebrow as he looked at the hand holding him back.

"No. I'll go" Callen stated simply. There was no arguing with him in this. He was the one who had been there when it happened. He was the one who needed to be there for Deeks now. He knew the other man wouldn't want his new friends to see him until he was ready, and he knew Deeks wouldn't want to talk to anyone other than someone who already knew all the gory details.

Frank looked at him for half a minute, weighing things up in his mind before he relaxed back into his sit.

"Okay." He nodded, though neither Callen nor Henry missed how his knuckles whitened around his bottle beer, as if holding that was the only thing stopping him from going after the kid he had come to care for so deeply is such a short amount of time. The kid he was starting to think of as son, even if he had only known him a week.

Callen stood, emptied his beer and leaving the bottle on the table before he made him way out the door. He wondered how far he would have to go search for his team member, but he found the answer to that wasn't far, considering he was sitting on the step, Monty wrapped around his back with his head in Deeks' lap. Callen made sure he made a noise as he moved to join them, but not too much as to startle, just enough to make sure they both knew he was there.

Callen sat down beside Deeks, and reached out to scratch Monty's head. Not because he wanted to soothe the animal, but more it was the closest he felt Deeks would let him get to comforting him. He didn't want to touch the other man, he knew he wouldn't like it. So instead he sat there and petted Monty until the former detective at his side relaxed in his presence. Relaxed in knowing he wasn't going to try and break his personal space bubble, or offer meaningless platitudes. Callen waited until he was sure Deeks had himself under control before he spoke.

"She was following orders. She didn't want to do it." He said quietly, addressing what in his mind was the major issue Deeks was dealing with. The idea that someone you not only trusted to have your back, but also cared for, failed you. It was hard. Hell hard didn't even come close to describing it. And he wanted, no needed to help Deeks overcome this.

"I know." Deeks replied, and he did academically. "But that doesn't change anything." He continued before finally turning and catching Callen's eyes with his own. The look in them was so filled with hurt, and disbelief, and… confusion. As if he couldn't believe it had happened. It was a look Callen had seen in his own eyes, a long time ago. A look which made him know exactly what was coming, but knowing Deeks needed to put it into words. "Do you know what I felt when I saw her come through that door? I was so relieved that we were getting out of there. That it was over. But rather than untie me, she left me. The betrayal I felt at that… it's never going to go away, Callen. Never."

"I know." Callen replied softly, his own eyes turning out towards the black, staring at where his ears told him the ocean was, he remembered that feeling. That op with Tracy, his 'wife'. The woman he had cared for so deeply. The woman who had left him and hadn't had his back, instead she had completed the mission. Because to her the mission was more important than them. She had taught him a stark lesson on that op, that the only person you can depend on is yourself, even your partner will leave you for the mission. It was lesson he never wanted anyone else to learn. But it seemed Deeks had. Oh he knew it wasn't the same situation, but betrayal was betrayal, no matter how you looked at it. And in thinking that he knew that that relationship between Deeks and Kensi would never be able to be repaired. That betrayal would never go away, it might fade, but it would always be there at the back of Deeks' mind. Nothing between them would ever be the same again. But in thinking that a question came to him. One he didn't want to ask, but one he knew he needed to know the answer to. Therefore still looking out at the ocean he put voice to the worry he now had in his heart. "Do you blame me for what happened?"

"No. why would I?" Deeks asked with a frown. Why should he blame Callen? He wasn't the one holding the drill, hell he hadn't been anywhere near them throughout the whole ordeal.

"I was the one that let Sam get made. It was my fault that… Janvier had the chance to betray us." Callen replied, spitting out the name of the man he had such hatred for. The one man who had played him time again. The one that if he was some comic book hero he knew would be classed as his arch nemesis.

"You didn't torture me, Callen. That's all on Sidorov. It wasn't your fault. And I would do the same again in that situation. Just as I know you or Sam would. But Kensi…" at that Deeks trailed off. Because he was no longer sure his partner would have done for him what he had done for Sam. No that wasn't true, he was sure she would, it was more he could no longer trust her to do it without question. But then he shook his head. It didn't matter anymore, she wasn't his partner anymore. It was done over with. He didn't need to worry about that anymore so instead he turned his mind to something else. Something he should have probably asked before now. "How's Sam doing anyway?"

"He's fine. Misses you, though he refused to admit it." Callen responded with a smirk on his lips. In truth his partner was being a bear to him currently. Mainly due to the fact the big guy was convinced he knew where Deeks was but wasn't telling. Which sure, now was true. But hadn't been earlier in the week.

"I knew the big guy cared really, deep down." Deeks replied with a chuckle. He didn't envy whoever they got to replace him. He remembered his first day as LAPD liaison for NCIS. It had not gone well. Not to mention Sam had insisted on calling him temp the whole damn time.

"Yeah, that or he really doesn't like change." Callen agreed causing Deeks' chuckle to become a full out laugh at his deadpan words. They seemed to lighten the air between them better than anything else could have, and Callen was glad. Deeks didn't blame him and they were still… friends. He decided right then he didn't care what the younger man's relationships with the rest of the team were, as long they had this, and nothing else really mattered. Not to them, not then. With that he decided it was probably time to ease the worry of the two men inside who had taken Deeks to their hearts without question.

"Come on, we'd better go back inside before Frank thinks I'm taking advantage of you and pulls the shotgun he has behind the bar on me." He said standing up.

"How do you know-" Deeks started to ask but then thought better of it. "No. you know what, I don't want to know." he continued with turning and grabbing the hand Callen offered to help him stand, using it to pull himself up and smiling at the man in front of him. And standing there staring into Callen's eyes there was a moment, a second when they both realised just how close they were standing, just how little a distance they would have to close to kiss.

But it was gone in a second later when Callen turned towards the door. Because as much as he would happily kiss Deeks, he knew now was definitely not the time to even consider it. They were friends, and he was more than happy with that. Therefore he answered Deeks unasked question.

"I may have seen the gun licence when I was running the background check."

"You're terrible, Callen. I pretty sure Hetty would not approve of your misuse of government records." Deeks responded in a jokey tone as he followed the older man towards the door.

"You're part of my team, Deeks. It's my job to make sure you're okay." Callen replied. It really was that simple to him.

"I quit." Deeks leaned forwards to remind him.

"Still part of my team." Callen answered back with a shrug. Deeks would always be part of his team, because his team were his friends and family, and they were the ones he looked out for. And he would always look out for the younger man.

And Deeks hearing that didn't say anything more, even while a smile spread across his face. Because he knew what Callen was saying, and he knew he meant it. No matter what he would always have Callen at his back, whether he needed it or not. It was good to know there was someone from his former life he could trust so completely, even if he had never thought it would be the man in front of him. He wasn't going to say no, that was for sure.

* * *

Frank and Henry had watched Callen walk outside, and they sat in silence until the heard the quiet murmur of voices, telling them that kid and the agent weren't too far away from them. It was only then that Henry turned to his husband and spoke quietly.

"He was tortured."

"Yeah." Frank responded not really sure what else he could say to that. He'd thought someone had broken Deeks' trust somehow, but what he had just learnt… that was more than he ever thought possible.

"How could anyone do that?" Henry asked seriously, confusion in voice at the idea that a human being could to that to another human being. He didn't understand what sort of mind such a person would have to have. It was wrong on every level he could think of.

"There are some evil sons of bitches in the world, Henry. And I'm pretty sure that agent Callen and his team get to meet the worst of the worst." Frank sighed as he replied, moving to wrap his arm around the younger man, pulling his husband close so he could nuzzle at his hair, wanting to give him reassurance that they were fine, that everyone was okay.

"Yeah. Hope he has someone good watching his back." Henry agreed, looking towards the door where the other two men were. He was worried about what Callen faced on a daily basis. He didn't want the man he had just met to be hurt, even if he hadn't liked him to being with. That had purely been in defence of Deeks. But seeing the two together he realised he was the kid's friend.

"Worried about him are you?" Frank asked with a raise of an eyebrow, and when Henry turned to look at him he continued.

"Should I be jealous?" He asked with a smirk causing Henry to roll his eyes, deciding it best to not even give a response to that. Frank knew the answer was no.

"He's Deeks' friend. Of course I am worried." Henry said instead.

"Me too, babe. Me too." Frank agreed, though his worry was less for the agent himself, and more for what would happen to Deeks if he ever found out something had happened to Callen. He didn't like to think how the kid would react to that. How he would blame himself because he had walked away and wasn't there to watch over him. Yeah, he really hoped nothing happened to Callen, because he was pretty sure that that would be the thing that would break Deeks beyond repair.


	8. Chapter 8

**Hello my lovelies. I would like to thank** **Amy (Guest),** **Adri1577, Petunia3116, Lic. Lu, ssl71, heyjode, PirateGinge and Guest** **for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS: LA.**

* * *

Callen woke the next morning with his arms wrapped around a warm body, one which had its back pressed up against his chest. It took half a second before he realised that the body belonged to Deeks and that somehow in the night he had gone from lying next to the man to spooning him. As carefully as he could Callen eased backward, removing the arm he had around the younger man's waist so that he was lying on his back staring at the ceil, even if his other arm was still trapped underneath Deeks' head. He was glad he had woken up first, as he really hadn't planned on touching the other guy in such a way. He'd had no plans to hold him during the night, no matter how much he had enjoyed it. And he knew he had, the peace that had been in him when he woke told him that much. But still it couldn't happen again, or more importantly Deeks could never know. With a sigh he finally decided he should reclaim the arm still trapped under Deeks, and as such he slowly pulled it away as he sat up, only to be confronted by the big disapproving eyes of Monty staring at him. It was obvious he had been watching him a while.

"I promise I'll try to keep my hands to myself in the future, okay?" He asked the dog in a whisper as he leaned forwards to scratch behind Monty's ears, causing the dog to settle back down. At least he hadn't woken Deeks, that was a good thing, and it didn't even cross Callen's mind that he had used the try rather than promising never to end up with the younger man in his arms again.

Once Monty was settled Callen decided it would probably be for the best if he got up. He had a long drive ahead of him, and he wanted to get back in time to submit the papers Deeks had signed if at all possible. Of course the fact that if he managed to get back in time to do that then it would most probably be after Bates and Hetty had both left for the day, would just be an added bonus in his mind. He also needed to go talk to the building manager of Deeks' apartment to find out how soon the kid could give in his notice. And how soon he would need to organise a removals company to move all his stuff over to his own house. So yes, it would be best to leave as soon as possible. With those thoughts he grabbed his go bag and made his way to the shower room.

* * *

Deeks woke to sunlight coming through the uncovered window and he couldn't help the soft moan of pleasure that left his lips at the feel of it on his skin as he stretched, in a very cat like manor. He was in the middle of his stretch when he realised something wasn't quite right. And not a second later he felt the hairs on the back of his neck rise at the feel of eyes on him. For a fraction he tensed, but then he remembered the man he had invited to share his room the previous evening and he relaxed, finishing his movements before rolling over and coming face to face with Callen who was sitting in the chair next to his bed.

"Morning." He mumbled sleepily as he smiled at his former team leader.

"Morning yourself." Callen replied with a chuckle, he had enjoyed watching Deeks wake, and he couldn't stop himself for hoping that he would get to see it again someday.

Deeks took note of the fact Callen was wearing new clothes and the smell of his body wash that was permeating the room. It didn't take a genius investigator to realise Callen had already showered. He wondered if the other man had just been waiting for him to wake so he could say goodbye, and for some reason he didn't like the idea of him leaving. Oh he knew he would. Callen had to return to LA, but that didn't mean Deeks couldn't try and keep him a little bit longer. Therefore pulling himself up so he was sitting he said, "Give me a moment to shower and dress and we'll take Monty out for a walk."

"I should really be going." Callen responded, though he made no move to do so. He liked the idea of going with Deeks and Monty for a walk, getting to see more of the area the other man had chosen to settle in.

"There is no way you can leave until after breakfast. If you try Henry will hunt you down. It is the most important meal of the day, or as he likes to tell me every morning. Although, I pretty sure he says that about every meal so…" Deeks replied with a chuckle, though in truth he wasn't joking. He was wouldn't put it past Henry to drive after Callen with a plate filled with food if he found out he had left without eating. He hadn't missed the looks the two men he now worked for had given his former boss when they had come in from talking outside the previous night, and while Frank had mainly been watching him, to make sure he was okay, he had seen how Henry had also been watching Callen.

"Well I can't let Henry down now can I? Go shower, then we'll take your mutt out for a walk." Callen responded with a smile and a nod towards the bathroom.

"Hey, don't call Monty a mutt. He's gorgeous, aren't you boy?" Deeks replied instantly as he climbed out of the bed giving the dog a good scratch on the head and a look that clearly told him not to listen to the mean old man.

And Callen couldn't help himself as before he even had time to think the next words came out of his mouth. "What, just like his owner?"

"Your words, Callen. Not mine." Deeks responded with a smirk around the doorframe before disappearing into the bathroom, leaving Callen to roll his eyes at himself. He really shouldn't be flirting with Deeks.

* * *

It wasn't much later that the two men and dog were making their way to the cliff top. They didn't talk as they walked, for one because the ascent was rather steep and they wanted to save their breath, but also because they didn't feel the need. They were both comfortable enough in each other's presence to remain silent and just enjoy the peace of the place they were in. Enjoy the moment in time where there was no need for them to do be doing anything or going anywhere, revelling in the knowledge that they weren't being shot at or chased.

Once they reacted the top they both stopped to gain their breaths back and look over the view below them. Callen was amazed at what he saw. The cove was spread out to the right of him looking peaceful and serene from the height they were at, the waves breaking on the shore looking nothing more than a ruffle of water as they rolled in. And yet in front and directly below the ocean raged against the cliff edge, storming around the rocks that dared to be in its path, stopping it pounding relentlessly against stone that would one day yield to its might. But, while he could see it all, knew the power of what was in front of him, the sounds were so very gentle from where they stood. He felt like while he and Deeks were part of what he could see, they were also separate somehow.

It was wild, yet tamed and it made him feel alive as nothing in LA ever could. Only this show of nature's force could give him that sense of peace and excitement.

"I can see why you like it here." he said finally breaking the silence between him and Deeks.

"Yeah. It's pretty awesome, and surfing is something else." Deeks agreed smiling. He might just have to take his board out later, it looked like the waves were gonna be perfect in a few hours.

"I'll take your word for that." Callen responded. He wasn't really the surfing type, never had been even if he did grown up in LA. Pulling his eyes from the scene in front of him he turned to study the man at his side. He saw the smile on his face as he stared out at the waves, and he couldn't stop himself from saying, "you're really good here."

"Yeah, I am." Deeks replied turning to return Callen's stare. Looking into the older man's eyes with an open honesty he rarely had when in LA. He had nothing to hide, not anymore. He was who he was, and he was better than he had been in a long time. Yeah, he really was good.

"I'm glad. But know, you ever need anything, call. Okay?" Callen responded gently. He may have had all his fears settled about the life Deeks was now leading, but he needed the younger man to know that he would still be there for him. He still had his back.

"Thanks, Callen. And hey, you ever need a break, my bed is big enough for two." Deeks replied with a sincere smile. He didn't want this to be the last time he saw Callen, but he couldn't see himself returning to LA any time soon, if ever.

"I'll keep that in mind." Callen answered back, a slight smirk appearing as his eyes twinkled at ways he could take those words, not that he voice those ideas. Now was most definitely not the time.

Deeks of course saw the look and just rolled his eyes at what Callen was clearly itching to say, but he was thankful the guy chose not to. He could only take so much of Callen's teasing flirtations before he might just do something that he would probably regret. Therefore turning away from the cove he spoke over his shoulder. "Come on, or we'll be late for breakfast."

"Yeah we don't want that. I don't want to see what Henry would do to me for keeping you away from food." Callen chuckle as he fell into step with the other man and Monty.

"No, you really don't." Deeks agreed with an evil glint in his eyes as his overactive imagination gave him all sorts of answers.

* * *

They weren't late. In fact they arrived just as Frank and Henry came out of the kitchen carrying plates piled high with pancakes and bacon. Once Deeks had gotten everyone coffee, the four men settled in to enjoying their breakfast and the casual conversation that flowed between them.

But soon enough the food was gone and coffee was drunk, and Callen knew it was time for him to go.

"I'd best be getting back." He said into a lull in the conversation.

The words caused something to tighten inside of Deeks. He didn't know why, or understand what it meant, all he knew was he didn't want Callen to leave, though he knew he had to. He couldn't keep the team leader here, hidden away from the danger of LA and the job he did, however much Deeks may want to. Therefore forcing the feeling down he nodded and stood as he replied, "I'll walk you out."

"Frank, Henry. Pleasure to meet you both. Good luck keeping Deeks out of trouble, I know how hard it can be." Callen said turning to the other two men and shaking both theirs hands and smiling pleasantly at them. So very different to the look he had given Frank when he had first arrived the previous day.

"Hey." Deeks squawked causing the other men to chuckle.

"Good to meet you to, Callen. Don't be a stranger." Frank replied to the man in front of him, though he didn't think for a minute he would be. He couldn't see Callen just walking away from Deeks.

"I won't." Callen agreed with a nod before turning towards the door.

"Wait." Henry called before he could take a step forwards, and then he disappeared into the kitchen once more making Callen raise his eyebrows at Deeks, who just shrugged. He had no idea what Henry was doing.

Frank for his part knew exactly what his husband was up to and he couldn't stop the indulgent smile from appearing on his face as they waited Henry to return. He did not take long, but when he came back he had a brown paper bag in his hand.

"I made you lunch. I doubt very much you would think to stop to eat on the way to LA, and this way you don't have to." Henry proclaimed handing over the bag he had prepared earlier when he was getting the breakfast. There was no way he was letting Callen drive all the way back to LA without something to keep him going on the journey.

Callen took the bag with something like shock on his face. It had been a very long time since someone had made him lunch, but he liked the feeling all the same. It reminded slightly of the good homes he had lived in as a child, when the mom would force a packed lunch on him before he headed out to school. "Thank you." he said to man with a nod, before turning to head out once more, trailed by Deeks and Monty.

They got to the car and Callen loaded his bag into the boot and put his lunch carefully on the passenger seat. "Well, I guess this is it. I'll let you know what I find out about the apartment and everything." He said straightening, not sure what else to say now it was time for him to go.

"Thanks, for everything." Deeks replied with a smile as he pulled the older man into a brief hug before releasing and continuing. "And do me a favour, try not to get yourself killed."

"No promises, but I'll do my best." Callen agreed as he climbed into the car. Deeks took a step back then, giving him space so he could turn around and drive away.

As Deeks watched the car disappear up the road he felt the presence of the two men who had taken him in come to stand beside him. For a moment he tensed, because Callen was gone now. He was no longer there to act as buffer between the three of them, and he suddenly realised that this would be the first time they had spoken without him since all they had learnt the previous evening. Deeks wasn't sure how they were going react, how they were going to behave now. He just wanted to forget about it all, but he knew that wouldn't be possible if they started treating him differently. Started treating him as if he was something fragile that would break. Because he wasn't. He just wanted to move on. He just wanted to forget.

"You know, if I wasn't married, I'd give you a run for your money with that one." Henry said conversationally from his side, making Deeks turn to him with a puzzled frown.

"What?" He asked in confusion. Of all the things he had been prepared to hear, that sentence certainly wasn't one of them.

Rather than answering him Frank came up and wrapped his arms around his husband's waist as he rested his chin on his shoulder. "Babe, I'm pretty sure even if you weren't married, you wouldn't stand a chance." He added into the conversation.

"Seriously? What?" Deeks asked so completely thrown by the whole conversation they were having. He and Callen weren't like that. They were friends. Though when he looked into the other men's eyes he could see them both twinkling with an identical look of humour making him realise they were sending him up.

"You know what. I'm going surfing." He pouted as he said before fake storming off towards the bar to get his stuff, the laughter of the others following him. He wasn't really annoyed at them, he couldn't be. The teasing, it felt good. That short exchange showed him in a way nothing else could that they wouldn't treat him any differently than they had been before... Showed to him that he was still the same Deeks to them now as he had been yesterday morning. And that, that was a gift he would cherish deeply.

And Frank and Henry both sighed, relaxing into the other as they watched Deeks walk away. Now they knew what had happened to him, they knew they would have an uphill battle to help him get better. But they also knew they couldn't force him to talk about it, couldn't force him to face what he had been through. No, all they could do was be there for him, ready to catch the kid when fell, and be ready to help get up again afterwards. And they were ready to do just that.


	9. Chapter 9

**Hello my lovelies. I would like to thank** **Adri1577, anonkp, Lic. Lu, ssl71, Petunia3116 and PirateGinge** **for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So sorry for not updating last week, but it was my sister's wedding, so valid excuse in my mind. Any way I hope you like this new chapter. Also you'll understand the bits in italics soon, but I don't want to say now.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS: LA.**

* * *

 _Deeks couldn't move. He was forced to sit, tided to the chair as the man approached him. He was talking, but that wasn't what was on Deeks' mind right then. No that was the guy holding the drill. Suddenly hands were clutching at his head as his jaw was forced open. The sound of the drill being started caused panic and fear to shoot through him as he tried to struggle free. But to no avail. He watched in perverse horror as the drill came closer and closer before he could see the tip no more. And then he screamed at the shock acting first to send spams through him before the pain seared through his mouth, through his whole body, sending his mind whirling. All thought was flown as his world shrank to nothing more than the pain and what would come next. He could see nothing in front of him, hear nothing around him. Everything else was gone, all he knew was the drill and the pain._

 _But then it stopped._

 _The relief he felt was almost overwhelming. He almost had to stop himself from thanking those who had finally ended the torture, stop himself from babbling his graciousness at the relief they were affording him. Or at least he did until they moved and revealed the scene in front of him. Because there sat through clear glass doors was Callen, tied to a chair just like he was. A man with a drill standing at his side. Deeks screamed. He knew what was going to happen. He shouted as best he could while straining against the ties that held him tight. The only thought in his mind being that he needed to get to Callen, they needed to escape. He needed to not let this happen. But it seemed the people in the other room could not hear him as none showed any reaction to his behaviour, not even Callen turned to look his way. He was going to have to watch as what had been done to him, was done to the man in front of him. No, he couldn't. At that thought his struggles renewed tenfold. He couldn't let them hurt Callen as they had done him. He couldn't take that. No, he wouldn't take that. As such another scream ripped its self from his damaged throat, though to his ears it sounded more like he was gurgling on the blood in his mouth. But still he fought. Did all he could to get to his friend. Did all he could to save the man in front of him._

 _Suddenly there was a crashing sound and he was totally enclosed by darkness. In fact it was so dark he did not realise he was free until he felt a hand on his arm and he automatically shrank back from it. But as soon as it registered that he could move his arms he knew what he had to do. He had to fight. He had to get out away from these people, get Callen and get out of there. And to do that he would have to fight for his life._

* * *

Frank and Henry were woken in the middle of the night by a terrified, bloodcurdling scream. Frank was up with the baseball bat he kept by the bed in hand before he had even thought. He then turned to Henry to make sure he was okay, even if he knew he was still in their bed. It was an automatic reaction in his mind, to check first on the one he loved.

Henry for his part opened his mouth to ask something, he wasn't sure what but it was probably along the lines of 'what was that?' but that question was answered by another shout coming to them from the room outside of their own.

"Deeks." Frank said, not even thinking of putting down the bat as he ran towards the door. Ran towards the kid who sounded to be in so much pain. No one hurt him, not while he was under his roof. And as such he didn't even hesitate when he got to Deeks' locked door. Didn't even think before raising his foot and kicking it in with an ease of practice, even if it had been a long time since he had had to do such things in the line of duty.

The room beyond was empty expect for the kid and his dog, but Frank had caught Deeks thrashing about on the bed before sitting bolt upright at the sound of him crashing through the door.

"Sorry about that, kid. Needed to make sure you were okay." Frank said gently, moving towards the bed carefully, holding his hand out to Monty when he growled softly at him. When he had the dog's permission to approach he moved to crouch in front of the younger man as he gently placed a hand on his arm as he continued, "Deeks are you-"

But before he could say anything more Deeks' fist connected with his jaw, sending him sprawling backwards. "Deeks?" He called louder, and it was only then he realised that he still had his eyes closed. Deeks thought he was still in whatever nightmare that had him in his grip, and Frank had no idea what to do. But he knew he had to do something. As such he moved forwards again and while duking the fists coming his way, he tried to grab the kid's wrists. Tried to restrain him before he hurt himself or someone else. And as he tried to keep the kids fists and arms away from him Frank found himself abstractly thinking just how glad he was that Deeks' legs were trapped by the bed cover right then. The hands were bad enough.

Then Deeks finally spoke.

"Callen, no. Callen! Where are you?"

Well the solution became remarkably clear to Frank then. Without taking his eyes of the man in front of him he spoke to his husband. "Call him."

"All ready on it." Henry muttered back, phone to his ear. He had sensibly stayed out of the way of the flying body parts. He wasn't a fighter, never had been, he would only get in Frank's way if he tried to help. So instead he had tried to think of another way to help the kid in front of him. And well, there really was only one person he could think of that could do that, or at least that he knew of. And it didn't once cross his mind to wonder if Callen would truly appreciate a call in the middle of the night about Deeks. He'd seen the way the guy was with the kid, and he didn't doubt for a minute he would be there for him. Though what a guy a good six hours drive away could do he didn't really know. But he could hope the federal agent would have some answers for that.

* * *

Callen was sleeping. He had finally fallen into bed late that night after closing the case they had been working one man down. He wasn't looking forward to going back to work the next day. Deeks had been officially gone for over two weeks now, and Hetty really needed to find them someone else for the team. Of course he couldn't raise this with her, what with being given the cold shoulder by the lady. But he stood his ground. He wouldn't let her intimate him into betraying one of his team. He had had handed in Deeks' resignation, and he flatly refused to tell her where he was. He wasn't going to give her the chance to persuade Deeks to return to LA. And on a more selfish note, he didn't want her knowing about the peaceful place the younger man had found to live. Callen wanted to be the only one who knew of the calm.

He was awoken by his phone ringing, and he couldn't stop the groan that came out of his lips as he grabbed it and answered without bothering looking at the caller ID. After all there were only a very few people it could be.

"This had better be important." He muttered, not really caring who was on the other end.

"Agent Callen? This is Henry Monroe.-" came the reply.

Those words woke Callen as nothing else could as he shot up and interrupted whatever the chef was about to say. "Is Deeks okay? What happened?" He asked in rapid fire as he scanned the room looking for clothes he could put on.

"He's… he's having a nightmare. But it's more than that. We don't know what to do." Henry responded, trying to instil just how worried he and Frank were with his words as he didn't think the word nightmare did true justice to what he was seeing.

"Put me on loud speaker." Callen answered doing the same with his own phone as he grabbed a pair of jogging bottoms and pulled them on. When he could here Deeks clearly through the phone he called out to him, hoping against hope that his voice might just get through to the kid. "Deeks. Deeks listen to me. You're safe. No one is gonna harm you, not now. You just need to open your eyes."

"Callen?" came a hopeful yet fearful voice down the line and the sound of struggling seemed to reduce, though it was still there.

"Yeah, it's me." Callen replied making his way out of his door and climbing into his car. There was no chance that he wasn't driving up to see the kid after Henry and Frank had had to call him. There was no way he was going to leave him to deal with the aftermath of this night alone. He had been dealing with too much alone before he quit, and that was changing, right now.

Deeks heard Callen's voice and breathed a sigh of relief. Then the words he spoke seeped into his brain and he frowned. He had his eyes closed? Well that explained the dark. Opening them slowly he was confronted with the extremely worried faces of both Frank and Henry. But that wasn't what caught his attention. No that was the broken lip and what looked like the beginnings of a black eye Frank had.

"What happened to you?" Deeks asked alert now. Glad to have something to help him push away the memories of the nightmare he had been having. Glad to have something else to focus on. He needed to protect Frank and Henry from whatever had hurt him.

"You've got a mean left hook, kid." Frank responded with a small smile, finally feeling it was okay to let go of his hold on Deeks' wrists.

"I did that?" Deeks asked his eyes going wide before he quickly moved backwards so his back was against the wall and he could take in the whole room. Henry looked okay, and it didn't seem like anything else was broken. Well apart from his door. But that didn't change the fact that he had hurt Frank. How could he do that? How could he have let himself hurt someone who was so kind to him? It was far too reminiscent to the memories of the abusive he had sustained at his father's hand. He had caused Frank pain for no reason, just like Gordon used to do to him. What was happening to him? How had this happened? Was he becoming just like the man he despised? his breathing started to accelerate as his eyes darted around the room, looking at everything and nothing at the questions going round his mind.

"Hey, kid. It's fine. Just breathe, yeah?" Frank responded, though he didn't move to follow Deeks when he retreated. He was behaving like an injured animal and Frank did not want to cause him to lash out again. He could understand him wanting his space after waking from that nightmare, he knew the feel of being a victim all too well from both his previous career and his own experiences with intolerance towards his sexual preferences.

Deeks just shook his head. He had hurt Frank. He had to leave now. He wouldn't be a man like his father. He didn't want to hurt anyone. He couldn't stay here if he was going to hurt them. But before his thoughts could go any further down that rabbit hole a voice penetrated once more.

"Deeks, listen to him, and for god's sake breathe."

"Callen? Where are you?" Deeks asked his eye darting around once more only to find the man speaking to him not in the room. He wondered for a second if he was imagining it. If maybe he was finally cracking up, he was sure he had a mass of reasons to do so. But before he could get that idea cemented into his head Henry held out his phone, that Deeks hadn't even noticed he had.

"Just getting on the highway. Should be with you in a few hours. Traffic should be light at this time of night." Callen replied deciding to give the real answer rather than explaining he was one the phone. He was sure Deeks would work that one out for himself.

At that Deeks blinked. Oaky he could understand Frank and Henry calling Callen, especially after what he had done to the former. But he couldn't work out for the live of him why Callen was on his way here. "What? Why are you coming here?" He asked still slightly disorientated from everything that had happened. His mind still trying to fight away the images he had seen in his nightmare.

"For you." Callen responded succinctly. He could hear the confusion Deeks had about him coming, but there was no way in hell Callen wouldn't do it. He had told him that he would be there for him, no matter what and that fact that Frank and Henry had called him showed him that Deeks needed him, even if the kid didn't seem to agree.

"No. You don't need to… I don't need you to-" Deeks responded saying exactly what Callen expected him to do. Not that he was going to be paying any attention to that right now.

"Tough, I'm coming. So you'd better be there to greet me or else." he interrupted. He knew the kid after all, and he had heard the struggle going on when he had answered the phone. He knew Deeks didn't like showing weakness to anyone, and right now he was extremely vulnerable. He wanted to make sure Deeks didn't cut and run, as he knew he himself would if the situation was reversed. He wanted Deeks to be able to stay and trust the men who had taken him in.

"Or else what?" Deeks asked attempting a jokey tone as he tried to pull some of his mask together, though all hearing could hear the waver and fear still resonating through on an undertone. As such Callen gave the only response he could think of that would make sure the kid stayed where he was and allowed Frank and Henry to look after him. The only words that would hopefully give him back a modicum of himself so he would do so. The only words that would give him back a part of the mask he had always worn.

"I'll tell Hetty were, and how, to find you."

At those words Deeks chuckled quietly as he leaned his head back, the tension draining out of him at hearing the voice of the one man he knew would always have his back. The one man he knew he could trust, and who was coming for him. The man who was coming to protect him and make sure he was safe, even if he knew he didn't really need it. He knew it was just a nightmare, and he knew the feelings would pass. But the idea that Callen was coming to him, it eased something in his chest that he had even realised was there. It was more than just the result of the nightmare, it was a residual from the real event that gave his dreams their dark colour. The knowledge that Callen, that someone, was coming for him, it was something he hadn't had before. The relief that gave him caused his eyes to start to close as he relaxed, as he offered up a token protest. "I guess there's nothing I can say to get you to turn around go home, is there?"

"Nope. I'll be there in time for breakfast." Callen responded absolutely.

"Then we should all get some sleep so we are ready to welcome you." Henry interrupted. He had seen how Deeks had almost dropped off only to jerk awake. He wanted to get the kid out of this room and to somewhere he would feel at least a little bit safer. He knew how hard nightmares could be, he had dealt with Frank's enough times to know that. And right then there was only one place he could think that would give Deeks the safety he needed.

"Right. Umm, guess I can put the chair against the door." Deeks responded dubiously as he looked at the kicked in door. He really didn't think he would be able to fall back to sleep knowing that there wasn't a secure lock on his door. But he would be okay. He had to be, there really wasn't any choice was there?

"No. You're sleeping with us for the rest of the night. You and Monty, come along." Henry stated simply as he signalled to Monty to follow him in the way he had seen Deeks do. There was no way he was letting the kid stay here for the rest of the night. If nothing else he was pretty sure Callen would kill them if they did that.

"Wait? What did you say? Because it sounded like-" Deeks started to say blinking at what he thought Henry just suggested. Because he couldn't mean what he thought he did, right?

"I had decided you would be sharing our bed. Yes, that is correct." Henry interrupted with a nonchalant nod as he moved out of the room, Monty half following him while also keeping an eye on his owner.

"Umm, three in a bed-" Deeks started to say not sure how to voice his worries at the practicality of such suggestion, as well as being not sure how he felt about the idea of sharing Frank and Henry's bed. I mean that was weird on a whole new level in his mind.

"Don't worry about that. This one likes to sleep diagonally across the bed, so to stop myself from waking on the floor every morning I made sure we got the biggest bed going. There is more than enough room for us all. Come on." Frank interrupted seeing the thoughts going through Deeks mind. There was more than room for all of them, and he knew he would feel better having the kid with them for the rest of the night, or at least until Callen arrived at any rate.

"guys, I can't impose-" Deeks tried again to get out of Henrys declaration, but one look from the other man made him close his mouth and stop talking.

"Do I look like this is up for debate, young man? Now move. Come along." Henry responded giving his no nonsense glare at Deeks. He had never in his life had this much trouble getting a man into his bed before.

Callen decided now was a good time to put his two cents worth in, as there was silence from the other three men. Therefore he said, "Go, Deeks. I'll see you in a few hours. Try and get some rest, yeah?"

"Yeah." Deeks replied still not completely sure about this, but not resisting as he found himself being hustled out of his room and through the door of Frank and Henry's apartment.

As they walked down the corridor he got a glimpse of the livingroom with a comfy looking couch and TV, and a clean, spacious bathroom. But before he knew it he was in the bedroom. Frank hadn't been lying the bed really was massive. Deeks had aimed to sleep on the edge, not wanting to intrude on the married couple, but before he could even think of suggesting it he was pushed into the centre. And before he could even try to protest the other two men were lying next to him.

"Relax, Deeks. Frank will make sure you're safe, and Callen will be here soon." Henry muttered soothingly, reaching out for the younger man's hand and taking it in his, hoping that the connection would ground him from further nightmares.

"That I will, and I'll stay on the line until I get there." Callen responded through the phone Henry placed on the bedside table.

With that Deeks nodded, "Okay." He was confused and tried and everything that had happened that night was too much for him to try and process. So instead he just let it all happen around him, it was easier that way in his mind. It gave him a chance to shut off and thinking of nothing. Let others take care of him. It wasn't something he was used to, but right then it was exactly what he needed. With that he settling down between the married couple, his eyes drifting closed even as he tried to stop them. But it seemed he didn't have any control over it right then, and as he fell into a fitful slumber, he felt the reassuring touch of Henry's hand in his while Franks arm wrapped around his waist in an offer of support, not to mention hearing the sounds of the three other men breathing.

And Callen on the phone listened as the men in the room slowly fell asleep. Listened as first Deeks' breathing even out, followed shortly by Henry and finally by Frank. He didn't think it was that weird to be listening to the other men sleeping. If that was what Deeks needed, then that was fine with him. And somehow he found a comforting reassurance listening to the gentle snores, and snuffles the others made in slumber as he drove down the deserted roads towards the three men he could hear. At least he knew Deeks wasn't alone in dealing with the demons in his mind. And he would be here soon enough.


	10. Chapter 10

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank** **Sassylassy1313, ssl71, Lic. Lu,** **PirateGinge, heyjode and Guest** **for the wonderful reviews I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So this chapter is short, and the reason for that is that the next one could well be quite long, and I didn't want to combine them. Plus I can't write anything more tonight (though I should update again on Friday) so thought you would prefer the update now. Anyway, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS: LA.**

* * *

Frank woke and instantly knew the body in his arms was not that of his husband. His reactions kicked in and his eyes flew open as he started to pull away, only for the memories of what had happened the previous night to return with the sight of the fluffy blond hair that greeted him. He let out a sigh of relief to see Deeks lying there, sleeping peacefully between him and the man he loved. The man who his eyes strayed to once he had run a quick glance over the kid to make sure he was alright.

The sight that greeted him made a small sad smile appear on his lips. Because there was Henry, lying face to face with Deeks, his hand clutched tightly in his husbands, and Frank couldn't help but wonder if this was how he would have been if they had been able to have children. If they had been able to have the family he had always known Henry had wanted deep down. But it was too late now. Oh he knew that things had changed, that they could adopt, but they were both too old and stuck in their ways to do that now. Ten years ago, sure, but not now. He was pulled from these melancholy thoughts by Henry's eyes opening.

"Morning, lover." Henry muttered quietly so not to disturb the other man sharing their bed.

"Morning, babe." Frank responded, and he couldn't stop himself from leaning over Deeks and placing a chaste kiss on his husband's lips.

"Mmm. Just how I like to start the day." Henry said when they pulled apart, stretching as he did so, though not letting go of Deeks' hand. "But I should probably get up. Need to get breakfast started. No doubt Agent Callen will be here soon." He continued with, sitting up as he did so, though still making sure not to disturb Deeks.

"I'm about ten minutes away actually." Came a sudden disembodied voice from Henry's phone that he hadn't even thought about when he left it on the nightstand the previous evening.

"Callen? You stayed on the line all night?" Frank asked not sure whether that was creepy or committed, before finally settling on a little bit of both.

"I promised Deeks I would." Callen replied simply. To him that was all he needed to say on the matter.

"Wow, my phone bill is going to be through the roof." Henry muttered with fake indignation, the chuckle of humour heard by all those listening, in his voice.

"Send me an invoice, I'll put it on expenses." Callen responded smiling at the idea of him presenting Hetty with that one. Not that he would, but he would love to see the look on her face if he ever did.

"I'm sure you would. Well I'd best get up so I can let you in hadn't I?" Henry replied finally pulling himself out of the bed and gently extracting his hand. Of course this caused a restlessness to appear in Deeks, which was quickly soothed by Frank wrapping his arm around the kid once more. It seemed the way to keep Deeks peaceful right then was to give him human contact. And he could do that, until Callen arrived and took over from him at any rate.

"See you soon." Callen murmured quietly when he heard Deeks settle down again. He didn't want to wake him, not yet. Not when he wasn't there at his side to help him through what was to surely come with he woke.

* * *

Callen pulled into the parking lot eight minutes later. Hearing the voices on the other end of the phone had spurned him on. Climbing out of the car he stretched as he watched how the early morning sun reflected off of the waves crashing on the shore, he'd made good time getting here. He then turned to the back door of the bar, the one he knew would be open and would lead him to the man he had driven through the night to see.

Walking into the kitchen he was pleasantly surprised to be greeted by Henry handing him a cup of coffee.

"I thought you could probably do with this after the drive." He said with a smile as he watched how the younger man inhaled the aroma as if it was oxygen.

"There wasn't any traffic, so not really that bad." Callen responded taking a sip and sighing in appreciation. He had to give it to Henry and Frank, they had damn good coffee. The drive was almost worth it just for a cup of this. Of course then he caught sight of all the ingredients already laid out on the side and he remembered the food was even better. He couldn't wait for breakfast. The last thing he had eaten was a cold burger he'd managed to grab before going out to take down the bad guys on the last case.

"I'm just glad you have the day off to be here. Deeks will be too, I'm sure." Henry replied moving to get back to getting everything ready for breakfast, while simultaneously preparing the kitchen for the day ahead.

His words caused Callen's eyes to widen comically as he quickly put down the coffee and grabbed his phone.

"Crap. Thanks for reminding me." He muttered before firing off a quick text to Hetty telling her he was seriously ill and couldn't possibly make it into work that day or the next. He didn't think she would buy it for a minute, but as soon as he had sent the message he turned off his phone and pulled the battery out. That would prevent her finding him, for a little while at least. And hey, he had given her a valid excuse for not being in the office, if she didn't believe him, well then, that was her problem.

Henry raised his eyebrow at Callen's behaviour, and when he dismantled his phone the other one joined it.

"My boss can be a bit… over protective. Best she doesn't know where I am." Callen explained, and Henry correctly read over protective as nosy in this case. He was glad Callen was keeping Deeks' old life from him, if his nightmare was anything to go by, Henry never wanted him anywhere near any of them ever again.

"I take it you don't have the day off, then?" Henry replied, realising for the first time that it had seemed a bit too good to be true that the situation with Deeks had happened when Callen didn't have to work.

"I have loads of sick days, it'll be fine." Callen responded breezily finishing his coffee as he did so. He then opened his mouth to ask Henry for directions to Deeks, but the other man forestalled him.

"Top of the stairs, end of the corridor. The door is unlocked and the bedroom is at the end on the left." He directed, shooing the other man out of his domain. He had breakfast to cook and a day's worth of meals to prepare.

Callen followed the simple directions and soon found himself in Henry and Frank's bedroom. He took a sweep of the room as he always did when somewhere new, and as such took in the large windows that opened onto the view of the cove. This room was on the same side as Deeks' room then. It was then his eyes turned to the bed and met the amused stare of Frank.

* * *

Frank had seen Callen enter and take in the room in a glance. He would bet good money that the boy could pinpoint exactly which of the windows the bedrooms now were from the outside, just from that quick glance. He was glad he was here. He knew Deeks was going to need him.

"Callen, why don't you take over here and I'll go help Henry." He said when the other man's eyes were finally on him.

"Fine with me." Callen replied his eyes going to the man sleeping in Frank's arms. He couldn't help the burst of jealousy he felt at that, even if he knew there was no cause for it. Frank loved Henry more than anything, and it wasn't like him and Deeks were anything more than friends. But it seemed the gut reaction didn't care about truth or logic.

"Get some sleep, breakfast will be a while." Frank responded, manfully managing not to laugh at the flash of emotion he had seen in the boy's eyes. Oh he had it bad for the kid, that was sure.

"Good plan." Callen agreed with a rueful smile as he ran his hand over his face. He had barely managed a couple of hours before driving down here, and he could really do with at least another one.

With that Frank nodded and climbed off the bed, turning his back as he moved to grab some clothes for the day and without another word he headed down to have a quick shower.

Callen waited until Frank had left before climbing onto the bed next to Deeks. He slide down so he was lying beside him, spooning him as he had woken doing a couple of weeks earlier, and barely two minutes later he was fast asleep with Deeks in his arms.

And that was how Frank found them when he returned. He couldn't help but smile at the scene in front of him, nor could he stop himself from taking a photo on his phone. Henry would want to see just how cute these two were together too after all. And he couldn't deny his husband that delight, now could he?


	11. Chapter 11

**Hello my lovelies. I would like to** thank Petunia3116, heyjode, Beststoriesever, Lic. Lu and Guest **for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, it is not as long as I thought it was going to be, but I hope you like it all the Same.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS: LA.**

* * *

Sam walked into the mission to find it strangely empty. He had assumed that when he found Callen's house empty that his partner would have already been here. But his desk looked the same as it had the previous night when they had left, and his bag was not by his chair. This caused him to frown. It was bad enough Deeks was missing, he didn't need G to be as well. With that in mind he headed towards Hetty's office. If anyone knew, she would.

"Where's G, Hetty?" He asked without any preamble as he approached her desk.

"He has called in sick." Hetty replied simply, wondering what Sam would make of that information.

"Really? Because he isn't at home." Sam stated. I mean forget for the moment that Callen never called in sick, if he was, he would be at home being ill.

"Indeed?" Hetty asked her eyebrow raising at that. It confirmed her suspicions the Mr Callen was somewhere doing something he didn't want any of them to know. That was never a good thing in her mind. When he went off the grid it never went well.

"Yeah. What's going on?" Sam asked hoping Hetty had some idea of what was up with his partner.

"I don't know, but I will find out, Sam. for today you will be partnered with Miss Blye." Hetty responded her final words a clear dismissal, that even though Sam didn't want to accept, he knew he had no choice. So instead he nodded to Hetty, and moved back to his desk. He was only going to wait until she left before going up to Eric and Nell and getting them to trace his partner. He had a feeling he was going to need him.

* * *

Hetty watched Sam walk away and knew what he was thinking, therefore she pulled her own laptop towards her. She needed to find Callen before his partner did. She didn't know why she felt that way, but she knew she needed to. And even as she started typing the trace for his mobile and car's GPS she felt the guilt that was starting to build inside her. The guilt at how she had been giving him the cold shoulder for how he had allowed Mr Deeks to walk away. It wasn't her boys fault, she knew that. He had just been the messenger. But he had refused to tell her where the other man was, refused to give her anything to help her change his mind. Oh she was sure she could find it out for herself easily enough, but she also knew she couldn't do that. She could not invade Mr Deeks privacy, no matter how much she wished to do so.

The results came back from her search, with the phone giving her nothing, not that she expected anything from it. What she was surprised about was the fact she got a hit of the car. The coordinates seemed to lead her to the middle of nowhere, which caused her to worry thinking someone might have gotten to her boy. That was before she found out about a bar that was located in the cove Callen was parked at. Though why he was there and what he was doing she had no idea. But staring at the blip that was his GPS and the information she could find on the bar and its proprietors, she found herself relaxing slightly. Frank Monroe had been a good police officer before being forced out for being gay, and his husband had nothing worse than a parking ticket from ten years ago. There was no danger for her boy there. He would be fine.

So instead she turned her mind to why he would be in such a place. The only conclusion that she could come to was that he needed time away. Away from her and the team. Away from the accusing stares he had been getting from them all because he refused to give up Mr Deeks' location and had been the one to process his paperwork.

Maybe it was time to let it go. Mr Deeks had made it very clear he would not be returning. Maybe it was time to find his replacement. She needed them to be working at full strength. With that realisation she turned to look through the list of current police officers, to see if she could spot one who would fit in with her team. She would need someone who was different from Mr Deeks, though just as good. Someone who would shine in his own right and not be taken as a replacement for the man they had lost. It took a while but she finally found exactly what she was looking for. Picking up the phone she dialled the chief of police.

"Yes, hello. I know who I want to be our new LAPD liaison… Yes… Detective Jason Thomas… Thankyou. The day after tomorrow will be the perfect time for him to start."

With that she hung up and looked towards what was left of her best team just as a whistle sang out from the balcony above calling them to ops. "Yes, Detective Thomas will do very well I'm sure." She muttered quietly with a smile on her face, before turning back to her computer and locking Callen's GPS location so that no one else would be able to find it. She would give him these two days, and hopefully when he came back the team would settle down with their newest member.

* * *

Deeks woke to find himself in a strange room with arms wrapped around him. He tensed, or he did until he registered the photo on the bedside table of Frank and Henry on what he guessed was their wedding day. He couldn't think of any other reason they would be wearing tuxes. Looking round the room he saw more evidence that told him whose room he was in. What he didn't know was why he was there, or who was holding him in his arms. He tried to remember the previous evening, but something in his mind seemed to be blocking it out. He didn't understand why, but that wasn't the most pressing concern right then so instead of trying to force the matter he slowly turned in the arms only to come face to face with a sleeping Callen.

Well that was unexpected. What was Callen doing here? And why on earth were they in Frank and Henry's bed? But before his mind could give him answers the blue eyes of his former team leader opened.

"Morning." Callen said to the very awake Deeks next to him. He was surprised he hadn't woken when the other man had, he must have been more tired that he thought.

"Hey. What are you doing here Callen? And for that matter why are we in Frank and Henry's room? Please tell me we didn't have a drunken orgy with them or something." Deeks replied humour lacing his tone.

"Err, no. What do you remember of last night, Deeks?" Callen asked carefully, not wanting to upset the other man but needing to know what he was dealing with.

"Well I had a few drinks with Frank and Henry, maybe a few to many. Then I went to bed in my room, and you definitely weren't here, I'm sure. After that… there's something…" suddenly Deeks pulled out or Callen's arms and moved to sit up against the headboard his eyes wide and his breathing heavy. "No." Was all he could say as suddenly the flood gates opened and everything came rushing back to him. The nightmare, Frank trying to wake him. The sound of Callen's voice and opening his eyes to find out he had hit Frank. No it couldn't be true. "Please, tell me it's not true." He whispered looking at Callen with such pain and heartbreak in his eyes.

"Deeks?" Callen asked moving to sit next to him. He wasn't sure what it was Deeks was remembering, but he wanted to be there of him whatever it was.

"Tell me I didn't hurt him. Tell me I'm not…" Deeks replied shaking his head hoping that if he did it hard enough the memories would disappear and cess to be true. He couldn't cope with the idea that he had hurt Frank. He had been nothing but kind to him, and yet he had hit him. No.

Callen reached over without thought and clasped Deeks face gently but firmly between his hands, wanting to stop the shaking that was starting to worry him. "Not what?" He asked when he was able to get Deeks to meet his eyes.

"Not like my father." Deeks whispered. The one thing that had always haunted him at the back of his mind coming to the surface in his vulnerable state. The one idea that he had always strived against, and tried to shield away from. That he could turn into the man who's DNA he had fifty percent of. That he could one day start drinking and never stop. That one day he would strike out at those closest to him and keep doing it to relieve his own pain and worthless suffering.

"You are nothing like him, Deeks. You could never be anything like him." Callen replied with steal in his voice. The idea that Deeks could even think he would be anything like that man… there was no possibility that he could ever be. He knew Deeks, and he knew he would rather die than hurt anyone he cared about intentionally.

"But I hit Frank. I had too much to drink and I hit him." Deeks responded, seeing only the parts that were parallel to his own childhood. He knew it had been too good to be true. The home he had here, the family he had in Frank and Henry. He had lost them all now. He couldn't' stay. He wouldn't stay and turn into that man.

"No. You hit him because you were still stuck in the nightmare. You didn't mean it, and you would never do it otherwise." Callen categorically stated. He had heard the scuffle over the phone. Had heard Franks explanation, and he knew that Deeks would never do something like that when in his right mind.

"But I still hit him. I can't stay here. I'm a danger to them." Deeks argued back. Even if he wasn't becoming his father, what happened when he got the next nightmare? The one the previous night wasn't his first and he very much doubted it would be his last. He refused to put anyone in danger just because he couldn't control himself in his sleep. That was no excuse. There was never any excuse for hurting someone who wasn't fighting back.

"Deeks, stop. You're not going anywhere." Callen replied simply. Though his voice said very clearly that that wasn't a suggestion. And he would do everything in his power to make sure Deeks stayed exactly where he was. Which considering he was Callen, was no doubt a hell of a lot.

"But Callen-" Deeks tried to argue back all the same. I mean for a start he doubted Frank and Henry would want him round after what he had done.

"I said no. And I don't think I'm alone in that one. There is no way Henry and Frank will let you leave either. So get that idea out of your head right now." Callen interrupted. He knew he was right there, there was no way the guy he had walked in to find holding Deeks that morning would just let him walk out of the door.

"How can I face them, knowing what I've done?" Deeks asked with a sigh as he collapsed backwards, his eyes closing as Callen's hands fell from his face.

"You didn't do anything. You were fighting for your life." Callen responded in a gentler tone, hoping he could force Deeks to accept what he was saying, but knowing he wouldn't. The guilt wouldn't leave the kid that easily, if only it would.

"But I didn't need to be." Deeks responded his eyes opening again and when Callen looked into them he could see the sheen of water waiting to drop. Could see the broken look on Deeks face at everything that had happened not just the previous night the past months as well. Therefore he did the only thing he could.

"You didn't know that." he replied before reaching over and pulling the younger man into his arms as he broke down. "It's not your fault." He whispered into his hair as he held him tight and let him release the pent up emotions that were churning through him as his wall finally collapsed. Let him cry out all that he needed to. Let him, for the first time, actually feel the emotional turmoil being tortured had. And while he knew it was bad, Callen also knew that Deeks needed to do this before he could move on. Before he had any chance of getting better. He knew that this was a good step on the road of recovery for his friend, just as he knew he would be with him every step of the way.


	12. Chapter 12

**Hello my dearies. I would like to thank** **Lic. Lu, Guest, heyjode, amywegner16, anonkp, PirateGinge and ssl71** **for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have flowed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So this is a long chapter, and rather heart-wrenching, also TRIGGER this is a bit graphic in some parts, but no more than the show was so… sorry about that. But it needed to be done. Again could be seen as anti-Kensi, but it's what I feel this Deeks is feeling and I got inspiration from the line where Deeks told Kensi that 'the place I went to in my head, to stop the pain – was you.', so please don't hate me. Anyway I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS: LA, nor any of the lines I have taken from the show.**

* * *

Frank had made his way down to the kitchen and did his duty by offering his services, even though he knew they would be declined. He knew his husband, and as much as they loved each other, he knew if he spent more than a few minutes in the kitchen under Henry the other man would be wanting to kill him. Therefore he had made a very sensible and tactical retreat to the bar to get it set up for the day, before laying a table for the four people there. He had just finished restocking the fridge when the smells of cooking pancakes came through the door and he knew it was time to re-enter the kitchen.

Going in he couldn't stop himself from walking up behind Henry and wrapping his arms around the other man as he expertly flipped the pancakes he was cooking. Nor could he stop himself from placing a sweet kiss on his neck as he did so.

"Behave or I'll burn these and you'll go hungry, mister." Henry said, though there was no heat or anger in his voice, nor in the way he lent back against the man behind him. The man he loved.

"Hmm, in that case, I should go and see if the boys are awake yet." Frank responded placing one more kiss on his husband before stepping back.

"Good plan. I'll hold off cooking theirs until you return." Henry replied. There was no point letting the pancakes get cold while waiting for the other two men to join them after all was there?

With a nod of his head Frank made his way up to their apartment. He opened the door quietly, not wanting to disturb the two men if they were still asleep, though he was even more glad of his stealth when he saw the scene that greeted him. Because there on his bed sat Deeks wrapped in Callen's arms as the deep wrenched cries were ripped from him. this was so much worse than how he had been that first time they had met on the beach, it sounded as if he was been torn apart, and knowing what he now knew, Frank couldn't help but think that that wasn't too far from the truth. He stood there for a second wondering what to do before his eyes connected with Callen's, who of course had registered the second he had stepped through the door.

They looked at each other and Frank got the message loud and clear. Callen would look after Deeks, it would be best if he left them to it. So even though it was against everything he really wanted to do Frank carefully retreated. Callen had known the kid longer than him, had been there though all the crap, surely he would be the better person to be there for him now.

Making his way back into the kitchen he spoke quietly yet in what he thought was a pretty good version of his usual voice. "I'm not sure how long the boys will, be. Best to leave theirs until later."

But his words caused Henry to turn quickly alarm written across his face. "What's wrong?" He asked, holding himself back from running up the stairs Frank had just come down. Surely if it was something serious that Callen could not deal with his husband would not be standing in front of him right then.

"Deeks is… he's processing." Frank responded with a sigh, he should have known better than to try and lie to Henry. He always knew what he was feeling, sometimes before even he himself had worked it out.

"Ah." Henry replied. He knew exactly what that meant. Nodding his head he continued. "Then I imagine Callen is the right person to help him with that. Come let's eat, they'll know where to find us when they are ready."

"yeah, your right." Frank agreed, moving to grab one of the plates, but not before planting a gentle kiss on his husbands lips, using it as a way to say without words how much he appreciated how he always knew exactly what to say, how he always knew exactly what Frank needed to hear.

With that the two men made their way into the bar and sat at the table, exchanging causal conversation and by a tactical agreement didn't mention the two men upstairs from them. Didn't speculate on what was going on or any way they could help the one they had taken under their wing so completely.

* * *

Callen held Deeks long after Frank had left, and kept on holding his as the cries died down into sniffs and hiccups as Deeks' body tried to regain its equilibrium. When he was satisfied that Deeks was over the worse, he pulled back so he could look at the man in his arms, but he didn't let him go.

"Why don't we take Monty for a walk up on the cliff?" He suggested. He knew Deeks, and he knew he needed to get out of the room, out of the bar before he truly faced everything now that his walls had gone. He needed time where he could try and find some peace inside himself now he was no longer hiding from the pain.

Deeks for his part just nodded. Yeah, get out of here. That had a definite appeal, not the most because if he was out of Frank and Henry's apartment he would hopefully have less of a chance to run into them.

"Okay, go get dressed. I'll tell Frank and Henry where we're going." Callen said, seeing the nod. With that he finally let go of the other man, but he didn't get off of the bed until Deeks moved to do so as well. And he walked behind him as he made his way out of the apartment and back to his room with the busted lock. Callen frowned at that. They would need to get that fixed before he would let Deeks sleep in their alone. Hmm something else to mention when he talked to the older men.

"Right, I'll go downstairs and meet you by the back door, all right?" he asked glad to see how Monty was refusing to leave Deeks' side. Damn that dog was a god send for his friend.

"Yeah." Deeks croaked back, before coughing and trying to make his voice sound less like he had just spend far too long a time in tears. But he knew it was a pointless endeavour and instead just nodded again.

With that Callen left Deeks to it and moved quickly to get downstairs. He didn't want to leave Deeks alone for longer than was absolutely necessary right then.

Deeks for his part carefully kept his eyes away from the bed in case the memories of what had happened the previous evening came back. Instead he turned to grab a tee and some jeans, as well as a big comfy jumper than he hoped he would be able to hide in as much as possible. He was glad Callen was talking to Frank and Henry, he really didn't think he could cope with other people right then, other than Callen that was. Not to mention he didn't want to see the evidence of his behaviour on his friends face. No. Don't think about that. Change, get ready for going out. Nothing more. Take it all one step at a time. And with that he slowly pulled off his sleep clothes, shivering as the cold air hit him before he managed to delve into the new clean material once more. That done he made his way to the bathroom and half-heartily tried to tame his hair and make himself look somewhat presentable, splashing cold water over his eyes hoping to reduce the redness. Not that he thought it would do much good. But he had to try something. He needed to be doing something. Because if he stop his brain would start working again, and he was ready for that. He wasn't sure he would ever be ready for that.

* * *

Callen walked into the bar to find the other two men finishing up their food.

"Hey, Deeks and I are taking Monty out for a walk. We'll eat when we come back." He said as a way of greeting, clearly saying without words to not ask after the younger man.

"Make sure you take some water with you, and I'll have breakfast ready for your return." Henry replied moving behind the bar to grab a couple of bottles and holding them out to Callen. No doubt if Deeks had been crying he could do with a drink.

"Thanks." Callen answered, glad someone else had suggested that. It hadn't even crossed his mind, he just wanted to get Deeks out of here and hopefully help him in the peaceful surroundings outside. With that he turned to go before he remembered the other thing he wanted to mention. "The lock on Deeks' door-"

Frank interrupted him before he could say anything more. "I've already called a friend of ours, Mike. He'll be here later today to fix it. Don't worry."

"See you in a bit." Callen nodded glad that Frank had also been worried about leaving Deeks in a room with no lock. He knew he could trust these men with his friend, and they were very much proving his point right then.

With that he moved through the door so he could wait for Deeks. He was just considering going up and finding the kid deciding after two minutes he was taking far too long, when he heard the patter of Monty's feet on the floorboards above. He knew Monty wouldn't be coming without Deeks and as such relaxed as he waited for the other two going on their walk to arrive.

* * *

They preceded up the same path they had taken the last time Callen was there. Mainly because he didn't know any others, and Deeks was not in the right frame of mind to lead. Instead he followed Callen without looking where they were going. All he knew was that it was away from the bar, away from the man he had hurt, and away from the site of what he could only see as his act of betrayal towards the one who had been nothing but kind to him.

When they finally reached the top Callen took Deeks' hand and sat down, positioning the younger man in front of him and between his legs so he could wrap his arms around him and Deeks could lean back on his chest. He wanted to make sure Deeks knew he wasn't alone and that he was safe, and keeping hold of him was the only way he could think to do that as they both stared out over the ocean below.

"You ready to talk about it?" Callen asked gently. There was no pushing in his voice, just a simple question, one which Deeks knew he could say no to and there would be no repercussions, no prodding or interrogation. It was up to him whether he wanted to talk or not, and he knew Callen would respect that.

As such he didn't answer with an automatic no. After all that had flooded him earlier, after all the walls he had built up had come crumbing down, he wasn't sure what the answer truly was anymore. So instead he sat there, wrapped in the safety of Callen's arms and said nothing as he listened the faint sound of the waves crashing against the beach and cliffs, listened the sounds of nature around him, a bird singing somewhere, and some insects humming. Sat there and breathed in the smell of the earth that was below him and the ocean in front, mingled in with the faint smell of flowers and grass that came on the breeze that was playing across his face, moving his hair so it tickled his nose. He sat there and just was, found once more the peace that this place gave him deep inside.

And when he could feel it coursing through him he finally found the words he wanted to say.

"The place I went to in my head to stop the pain, it was her. I kept thinking about her smile. Now I can't think of it without seeing her walk away from me, leaving me there."

Callen didn't say anything, just sat and listened to Deeks talk. He knew that Kensi was a big part of Deeks' problems, the betrayal he felt by her, by his partner, by the one Callen was pretty sure Deeks had once had more than just friendly feelings for. So he didn't say anything and just waited for what next Deeks wanted to say. This wasn't about defending others, or talking about what went wrong, this was about letting Deeks put words to what he was feeling inside.

"The pain. I've never felt anything like it, and I thought I'd taken some shit from my dad. But that was nothing to having someone drill through… having someone do that. But it was delayed you know?" Deeks asked humourlessly, not that he was expecting a response. In fact he had forgotten Callen was even there, he was so far into the memories, to thinking through it. So deep into finally letting himself remember it all in this place where he felt safe for the first time since it had happened. Remember it all now he had washed himself clean with his own tears.

"I remember coming to, tied to a chair. I could see Sam through the door in front of me, and I was so glad that he was alive. I'd had to perform CPR to bring him back. For one second I was happy that at least we were together. That there was still a chance of both of us getting out of there alive. If you're still breathing you can still fight. I remember Ray telling me that once, when he gave me a gun. As long as your still breathing there is a chance, there is always something you can do…" At that Deeks trailed off looking off into the distance but not seeing what was in front of him. No he was seeing himself at eleven holding a gun for the first time and pointing it at his dad. Saw himself pulling the trigger with the last of his strength to stop that man from causing any more harm to him and his mom.

Callen didn't know when Ray had given Deeks a gun, but that didn't matter now. So again he said nothing and just gently moved Deeks hair away from his cheek with his nose, so he could rest his own against the younger mans, giving him what he hoped was comfort against what was obviously a painful memory.

The feel of his hair moving brought Deeks back to the here and now, or at least to the memories he had been thinking about before he thought of Ray. As such he continued in a helpless tone of voice. "But not this time. No this time I had to sit there and watch as they tortured Sam, ran electrical currents through the chair he sat on. I couldn't hear anything, but I could see. I saw his strength then. The true strength he has inside…" the strength I don't have, Deeks thought before it raised another memory in his mind. One he knew he would have to force himself to put words to. He needed to say it all, face it all. As such he was whispering as he said "I watched and I remember thinking briefly how glad I was it wasn't me. God I hate myself for letting that thought into my head even if it was only for a second. I will never be able to make it up to Sam for thinking that. Never…"

Callen heard those words and wanted nothing more than to comfort the other man. Because he knew Deeks wouldn't be the first or the last to think them. No one could blame him for that. No one is selfless enough to not feel a small portion of relief at knowing they are not the one being tortured, even if any in their profession hate themselves every time they did. It was part of the job, part of who they were, one of the things they were trained to deal with. Not that Deeks had had that training. He was a cop who had been put into a situation so outside what he was expected to do, but he had survived and he had protected Michelle. He could have done nothing different, and nothing better in Callen's mind. But as much as he wanted to voice these words he knew he couldn't. Not yet, later, he would address them then, but for now he had to sit and listen. To hear all Deeks had to say and give him what strength he could to get through what was to come.

"Then they turned to me. They stopped torturing Sam and came for me instead. I knew what was going to come, and I knew that I couldn't let Sam down, not again. They grabbed me, force my mouth open with… I don't know what but damn it hurt. But then they stopped, asked about Quinn. For a second I wavered, for a second I was too scared to answer no, but then I saw Sam and I knew I could do this. For him I could do it. I had to do this, for him. So I shook my head."

Callen couldn't help but tighten his hold on Deeks as he took a deep breath. He knew what was coming next and he wanted more than anything to protect the younger man from the memories, but he knew he needed this. Needed to talk. So he let him.

"They started drilling. But I didn't feel it straight away. There was a second where I tasted the blood before the pain hit. That second, was one of the worst in my life. Because I knew what was going on, I knew what was happening, and I knew what was coming. When the pain came it drove everything else from my mind, but for that second, everything was crystal clear. I hate that second." Deeks spat out, his body tensing at the memories that were coming to him now. The memories of pain and blood and hands holding his head still so he couldn't move. He found himself shaking his head once more, just so he knew he could. At that movement Callen loosened his hold and moved back from Deeks' cheek. He didn't want him to feel as if he was trapped once more.

"I remember the pain, the taste of blood and the metal biting into my skin as they held me tight. I remember the first scream that was ripped from me. I don't know how many more there were. There was only pain, overwhelming pain, and when I couldn't take it anymore, there was her. Kensi's smile as we shared a joke, Kensi laughing at something I'd said. Kensi was the light I hung onto like it was my last lifeline. It was her that made me able to continue to say no. And then she came and left me there. And it all broke. Everything broke." And with those words the tears once more came as Deeks turned and wrapped himself in Callen's arms, letting him hold him, letting him be the strong one for him then.

Callen said nothing as pulled the younger man closer and once more held him as he cried. Though this time the tears were softer, they were less for the torture he had been through, and more for what he had lost in the process. He said nothing about the guilt coursing through him that Deeks had to go through all that because of him. That was his pain to bear, and he would, gladly. And as Callen held him he made a vow to himself, that Deeks would never go through this pain again. He would never let anything happen to him again. He would never let anyone close enough to torture him again, and he would never lose him like he had Kensi.

It took a while before Deeks came back to himself, and when he did it was to find he was practically curled up in Callen's lap. For a second he wondered if he should be embarrassed, but he couldn't really care about that. So instead of moving away from the man wrapped around him he settled back with his head resting on his shoulder and said the only words he felt he could say right then. "Thank you." what he was thanking him for exactly he wasn't sure. For being there for him right then? Maybe. For listening to him talk? Definitely. For travelling through the night to be at his side? Thank you wasn't words enough for that. Not in Deeks' mind.

"I'll always be here for you, Deeks." Callen replied softly once more moving Deeks hair with his nose though this time so he could place a sweet gentle kiss upon his forehead. A sign of nothing more than friendship and to show that Deeks would never have to doubt him.

They sat like that, in silence for a long time before Callen felt the younger man was ready for his next question. Was ready to remember what had happened the previous evening without breaking down at what he had been through. "Is that what you're nightmare was about?" He asked carefully.

"Yes… and no. You were there, instead of Sam. They were going to torture you as they had done me but… then there was a crash and it suddenly went dark and I was free. I had to get to you. Free you too. I'm guessing that when I… when I hit Frank." Deeks replied forcing himself to say the words about what he had done.

"Deeks. Frank doesn't blame you for that. He never could. He loves you, crazy as it seems to me." Callen replied smirking a little at the response his words got, though he was glad to see how they caused the twinkle he knew so well to reappear in Deeks' eyes instead of the dark pain-filled look he had since he woke that morning, though it wasn't gone completely, and Callen knew it wouldn't be for a long time to come, but he was glad to see a little of the Deeks he cared about come back to him.

"Hey. Plus I don't think so. He is married Callen, in case that escaped your notice." Deeks responded with a small smile. He knew what Callen was doing, lightening the mood and he appreciated it. It was helping drive out the dark thoughts in his mind, replacing the memories with banter instead of pain, even if he knew they were still there. The box was well and truly broken open and there would be no getting them back inside. But he did feel better at having faced them. At having finally put words to what he had been running from for so long. Having done it once, he knew now, he could do it again when next they invaded his sleeping mind, as long as he had the help of the friend at his side.

"There are other kinds of love, Deeks. Stop being obtuse." Callen replied in a fake stern voice, though he ruined it slightly by chuckling at the roll of Deeks eyes. Yeah, the kid was going to be okay. He had faced what had been haunting him. Faced it head on, and now he could start moving forwards. Start putting it behind him. They both could.

"Hmmm. I'm hungry. Don't suppose you brought any food with you did you?" Deeks asked. He had finished one of the waters while he had been talking, and now his stomach was reminding him he had missed breakfast.

"Do you really think Henry would let me felicitate you missing his breakfast? Seriously?" Callen asked raising one eyebrow, though in truth he was hoping that the younger man would agree to return with him. To talk things out with the other two men. They all needed it in Callen's mind, and he knew it would help Deeks more than anything he could say, if he heard it from Frank himself that he didn't blame him.

"Okay. Point. We'll go down in a bit, yeah?" Deeks replied understanding what Callen was really asking without him having to say the words. But he wasn't ready just yet to return. Not yet ready to face the others. So instead he settled himself in a comfortable position in Callen's arms, leaning back against him once more as he rested his head on his shoulder and stared out at the ocean beyond. Yeah, he wanted to stay here just a little longer, knowing he was safe in Callen's arms and that the other man would give him the time he needed to find his peace once more.


	13. Chapter 13

**Hello my lovelies. I would like to thank** **Lic. Lu** **, heyjode, Petunia3116, Guest and anonkp for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS: LA.**

* * *

Frank was busy cutting the fruit for behind the bar when the front door opened. His head shot up only to see Monty making his way through followed by two men. He didn't even hesitate as he made his way round the bar and grabbed Deeks, pulling him into his arms as he wrapped one had around his head so he could ease it on to his shoulder. And while he did so he spoke without thought the words that had been going through his head all morning. "I've got you, son. I'm here for you."

Deeks heard the words and couldn't help the lump that formed in his throat at them. Son. Frank had called him son. He sounded as Deeks had heard so many fathers sound throughout his life, just never his own. He never expected to hear someone speak to him that way. To sound so full of concern and… love. Callen was right, Frank loved him. He still couldn't believe it after all that had happened. After all he had done the night before. He had expected to have to offer apologises aplenty as well as a promise it would never happen again before Frank let he back into his life. But it seemed he was wrong. Somehow, someway he had been given something he had never thought he would ever achieve, the unconditional love of a father.

But that didn't mean he was just going to accept it. He knew he couldn't. Because however much he wanted it to be true, Frank was not his dad. Therefore he pulled back from the other man, though only so far as Frank would let him which was that far at all.

"I'm sorry I hit you, Frank. I so sorry." He whispered feeling tears in his eyes once more that morning. Damn he was becoming a watering spout the amount he was crying, but he really couldn't find it in himself to care overly much. He knew none of those around him would hold it against him.

"There is nothing for you to be sorry about, Deeks. You hear me? Nothing." Frank responded with a determined look in his eye as he gripped the younger man's head tighter hoping to get his message across. The kid didn't need to say sorry to him, he knew it was the nightmare that had caused him to do it. Just as he knew next time to not try and approach Deeks until they had Callen on the other end of the line, even if he wished his words alone would do the job.

"Still sorry." Deeks replied stubbornly, though there was a small smile on his lips as he did so. He knew Frank meant his words, but he couldn't forgive himself as easily as it seem Frank could.

"Okay. Why don't you go tell Henry your back so he can cook your breakfast?" Frank nodded after looking in his eyes and understanding what he was feeling. It would take time before Deeks could forgive himself, but at least he was still here with them so they could help him do just that.

At that Deeks nodded, before heading for the side door, Monty at his side.

As soon as the door closed on Deeks, Frank turned to the other man in the room, the one he hadn't even looked at before now, but knew was instrumental in his boy being back under his roof. "Thank you." He said sincerely to Callen.

"Just doing my job." Callen replied with a small smile wondering what Frank would make of that. It was nothing more than the truth to him. Deeks was part of his team, making sure he was okay was his responsibility. It didn't end just because the kid quit.

"Your job?" Frank asked with an upraised eyebrow. There was no way what Callen had done was his job. No. That was the behaviour of a friend, if not something more if he was reading the undercurrents right between these two.

"He's part of my team. He's family." Callen replied simply hoping that would explain what he was trying to say, without Frank thinking it was more. He could see what was in the older guys eyes and while sure, he thought Deeks was hot, there was no way he would ever try and make a move right then. The kid needed a friend far more than he needed a lover to get through what he was going through.

"Okay. Go. I'll set up a table for you both." Frank responded with a wave of his hand towards the door. He had seen how Callen barely took his eyes off the last place he had seen the kid, and he knew he wanted to follow him. Who was he to stand in his way?

* * *

Deeks made his way into the kitchen, making sure Monty stayed outside the door as he did so.

"Henry, can I-" He started to say, but before he could complete his request he was engulfed in another set of arms as Henry practically jumped on him. After a minute his surprise lessened and he managed to mutter "need to breath." Before he was released.

"Don't you do that again young man, you hear me?" Henry snapped once he let Deeks go, instead waving his finger in Deeks' face.

"I'm sorry for hitting Frank." Deeks replied. He had known the whole forgiveness thing was too good to be true. He should have realised that Henry would be the one that was angry at him for what he had done. For hurting the man he loved.

"I'm not talking about that, Deeks. I'm talking about the going out without breakfast. Don't you know it is the most important meal of the day? Now shoo. Out of kitchen while I get you and Callen something to eat." Henry responded in exasperation. Of course the younger man would think he meant hitting Frank, but he knew that wasn't personal. Deeks had been having a nightmare, it was understandable. No, he was talking about the idea that boy would never return. Because he didn't think he could stand that any more than his husband could. It seemed Deeks had managed to find a way into both their hearts over the few short weeks he had been there. Henry finally felt like he had the family he had always wanted, and there was no way he was letting go of any of it, ever if he had his way.

"Right. I'll go wait in the bar then?" Deeks asked surprised by Henrys words. Why wasn't he angry with him for hurting Frank? Why wasn't he having a go at him for hurting the man he loved? Because he knew Henry, and he knew he wouldn't hesitate to rip a new one to anyone who did anything to his husband. So how the hell was he getting a free pass?

"You do that." Henry nodded before turning round and heading back to the stove to cook breakfast for the other two men, but just before Deeks walked through the door he spoke once more.

"You're the son we never had, Deeks. Don't forget that." he said softly. He had seen the confusion on the younger man's face, and he wanted to make it clear just where he stood in the hearts of both him and Frank. He didn't know much about the kids past, but he had seen enough over the past few weeks to know he hadn't had the most loving of fathers. Something Henry himself could sympathise with. His own had not been happy about having a gay son, to put it mildly. He knew what it was like to grow up without that love, and he wanted to make sure Deeks knew he didn't have to spend the rest of his life like that. That he now had him and Frank, and they were not going to go anywhere. And he knew Frank would never spell it out for the kid, so he might as well do so.

Deeks stopped at his words a gasp leaving his mouth at hearing it stated so plainly. This wasn't some heat of the moment hug calling him son, this was Henry declaring it as clear as day. How had that happened, when had that happened? And what the hell could he say in response to such words? But luckily he didn't have to think of an answer, because it was at that point the swing door in front of him opened to reveal Callen.

* * *

Callen had walked towards the kitchen silently as he always did. He smiled when he saw Monty sat at the closed door staring at it as if he had x-ray vision and could see what was happening inside. As such Callen stopped to give him scratch behind the ears before moving to open the door. It was at that point he heard Henry's words, and they caused a lump to form in his throat. He had known that Frank loved Deeks like his kid, but he hadn't realised Henry had felt the same. He'd been under the impression that the other man just thought of Deeks as a good friend, or more truthfully an injured bird Frank had taken under his wing. To hear him proclaim that not only Frank, but Henry too thought of Deeks as his child, it was more than Callen could have ever hoped Deeks would find. But he also knew that the former detective wouldn't know what to do with the words. As such he pushed opened the door and gave of the impression he had heard nothing of what had been said before.

"Frank is laying us a table in the bar. Shall we go and grab Monty his breakfast so he can join us?" He suggested casually his eyes not straying from Deeks as he spoke.

"Umm, yeah. Sounds good." Deeks nodded in agreement before turning once more to look at the man in the kitchen who had just declared himself as loving him like a parent. "Thanks, for making us breakfast." He said, in a voice barely above a whisper. And all three men there knew he wasn't thanking him for that at all.

"No need to thank me, Deeks. It's what you do for family." Henry replied with a smile and a nod to Callen who was standing behind the younger man's shoulder. If any knew what you did for family it was the man who had hightailed it here in the middle of the night and then taken two days off work just to be with his kid. Yeah, Callen was as much as family as Deeks was in Henry's mind.

"Right." Deeks agreed, before Callen took a hold of his arm and guided him out of the kitchen, pushing him towards the stair so that they could Monty's food.

* * *

It wasn't long before Deeks and Callen found themselves sat at their favourite table. The one that showed them all entrances and exits, with Monty happily eating at their feet. They didn't say anything as they sat and enjoyed the coffee Frank and given them both. No, they just sat and enjoyed the peace in the moment. The normality of what they were doing. Callen giving Deeks time to find himself, even if that did mean he once more put on his masks. Because no matter what had happened earlier he knew the kid would need them. He had had them for so long, there was no way they would dissolve after one night and hell of a lot of truths.

Henry came out with plates piled high with food for them both, informing them if they did not eat it all they would be in trouble. Callen smiled at that. Henry really was a mother hen, so much so he put Sam in the shade with his behaviour. But saying that he was also someone he didn't want to cross, and as such put himself to finishing of the food. It really wasn't a hardship, Henry was one hell of a chef.

Deeks for his part looked around the bar with new eyes as he ate. The idea that Frank and Henry were family was spinning in his mind so much it had pushed everything else right out of it. Or at least it did until he looked at the clock on the wall and saw the time. "Damn it. My shift starts in five minutes." He muttered turning resolutely to his plate so he could finish his food before he got behind the bar. He didn't know how he felt about working right now, but that didn't matter. Because he had to.

Finishing his plate in record time he stood to make his way to the bar, but before he could take a step away from the table Frank was at his side.

"And just where do you think you're going?" He asked with a raised eyebrow. He too had taken note of the time and he knew Deeks shift started then. But there was no way he was letting the kid behind the bar today. No he needed time off and he had the perfect excuse to give it to him.

"Umm, work?" Deeks replied not sure why Frank was questioning him about this. I mean, this was the guy who wrote the rota after all.

"No you're not. You're going to spend the day showing Callen around. Can't expect him to sit at the bar all day, now can you?" Frank responded resolutely. With that said he moved back to the bar to serve the couple who had just come through the door.

"right." Deeks sat back down again before turning to the man at his side. "So what do you want to see?" he asked Callen who was now sat back enjoying his coffee.

"How about we go for a walk. Somewhere other than the cliffs?" Callen suggested. He wanted to see more of this place that Deeks now called home. Wanted to see more of the life he led here with his new found family. Plus he wanted to get Deeks out of the building so Frank would have a chance to get his door fixed.

And that was how Callen found himself being dragged through the fields behind the bar making his way to the local farm shop, which Rob's daughter ran. And how he found himself once more bantering with the younger man at his side. No talk of what had happened earlier or been said by Frank and Henry was discussed. Instead he watched as Deeks turned from the haunted man he had been on the cliffs, back to the Deeks he knew. Though he wasn't completely the same. There were no walls behind his eyes this time. No, this wasn't the Deeks he had been before, there was more of the real Deeks he wanted to know showing through now. This was the start of man he had always seen beneath the others masks coming out, he was just glad he finally got the chance to meet him for real. It was past time in his mind, and while he hated what had caused the transformation, he couldn't help but be glad it had happened. Because he liked this Deeks even more than the other one.


	14. Chapter 14

**Hello my lovelies. I would like to thank** **Guest** **, heyjode, ssl71, anonkp, amywegner16 and Max and Fern 4ever** **for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So sorry for the long wait, holidays and all. But I am back now.**

 **For those of you who are asking about Kensi's reaction to all of this, she will be coming up in a couple of chapters. I promise. anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS: LA.**

* * *

That evening the four men sat down to share a beer after the bar was closed. The conversation between them was the usual kind of friendly banter Callen and Deeks usually shared interspersed with gossip from Frank and Henry's day at work. Finally a lull occurred and Callen remembered something he had meant to talk about with Deeks. In fact he had planned to come up on his days off to do just that, but he might as well do it now.

"Hey, Deeks. I spoke to your landlord and arranged for you to move out in two weeks. I've organised a company to come and pack up all your stuff for you, but I was wondering if there was anything you wanted me to box up before they came?" He asked causally round his beer.

"Like what?" Deeks asked right back, with a frown on his face at what Callen was talking about. To be honest he had pretty much forgotten all about the stuff he had left in LA. It surprised him somewhat to discover that all the things he had accumulated over his lifetime so far, he really didn't need. Something he hadn't realised until he had walked away from it all.

"Your porn stash under your bed, maybe?" Callen suggested with an evil grin. Not that he knew whether the younger man had one or not, but he was pretty sure that if he did that would be where he would keep it.

Deeks couldn't help but blush slightly at Callen's words. He well remembered his childhood when that was exactly where he kept a couple of playboys in the hopes his mom would never find them, not that it worked. "I do not have a porn stash thank you very much. Unlike you, I have no need for it, I find it very easy to get the real thing." He replied sassily, a cheeky grin on his face as he turned the attention back to Callen.

"Yeah, yeah. Keep dreaming surfer-boy." Callen responded with a roll of his eyes. He did very well for company thank you very much, even if in truth he really didn't feel like it that often. There was always so much lying involved that the occasional one night stand was all he ever had where sexual partners were concerned.

"I do not need to dream. But if you could box up my comics, that would be good." Deeks replied deciding to change the conversation away from sex. He started to feel uncomfortable talking about that with Callen. Though he knew it was less the topic of conversation and more the idea of Callen with different partners, with someone who wasn't him. Not that he had any rights on the man, or felt it was the right time to even consider such a thing, but still it didn't sit right in his mind.

"Wait, I thought you said you didn't have a porn stash?" Henry interjected at Deeks' comment smirking as the younger man turned to him with an unimpressed look.

"They are comic books. Not porn." Deeks stated clearly.

That was the point Frank decided to get involved in the conversation as well. "I have seen comic books, kid. I'm pretty sure they are nothing more than an acceptable form of porn." He responded with a knowing tone, though his eyes twinkled as he said it, taking great enjoyment in helping Henry rib their son.

"They are not." Deeks replied hotly, sounding like nothing more than a teenage boy talking to his parents when they teased him. It made everyone there laugh, but his tone also caused a warm glow to flow through the married couple. This was something they had never experienced before, but they both knew in that moment that it was something they would never get tired of. This was what they had always wanted, and had somehow, completely by some act of fate, found with the broken man sat with them.

Callen watched the family dynamic. Watched and listened to the words flowing from the other three with him without thought. He had seen enough families in his life to know what they looked like. And this, this was one of the good ones. He was glad Deeks had found Frank and Henry, glad that he had these two men to watch over him and help him, though what was to come. But he also felt it was best to change the direction of the conversation. Therefore in said, "don't worry I'll make sure they are safe. Anything you want me to bring you?"

"No. I think I'm good." Deeks replied without thought. he had already realised that he had everything he needed right then, and he knew that if in the future he wanted more, Callen would have it waiting for him.

"Okay. Remind me to get your key before I leave. Save me having to pick the lock again." Callen replied smirking as his words registered with the younger man.

"Again? Seriously? You broke into my apartment?" Deeks asked in fake indignation, though he probably should have realised that Callen would have done it to gain access to his apartment. Heaven forbid the man approach his building manager before entering the apartment, right?

"How else was I to see if you were there?" Callen asked simply, though there was a chuckle in his voice. He knew there were other ways he could have gained entry, but picking the lock was the quickest and easiest of the lot in his mind.

"Only you." Deeks replied with a roll of his eyes and exasperation in his voice.

With that laughter sounded once from the four men before Henry turned his mind back onto what Callen had said.

"Where are you storing all your stuff, Deeks?" he asked seriously. He was trying to think if they had any space that would do for housing Deeks' things, or failing that, if any of the farms around about would have space in one of their barns for it all. He didn't want the kid to have to get rid of it, or pay the extortionate prices he knew storage spaces in LA charged.

"I have a garage it will fit in, no problem." Callen reposed before Deeks could even open his mouth. He could see the wheels turning in Henry's mind, and he wanted to put his worries to rest.

"Not to mention the fact you are going to use my furniture to furnish your house." Deeks interjected not wanting the other two men thinking he was imposing on Callen. He could see what Henry was thinking just as well as his former team leader, and he didn't want them to worry about the things he still wasn't sure he needed to keep in his new life.

"Call it rent for the storage space. Plus I will only be using the couch… and maybe the TV." Callen replied with a shrug, unrepentant about the idea that he would be using Deeks' furniture. He knew the other man didn't really mind after all.

"What you got yourself a bed, G?" Deeks asked in fake shock, deciding to turn the teasing onto the other man. And it didn't even cross his mind that he had called him G rather than Callen.

"I have always had a bed, Marty." Callen responded placing subtle emphasis on the name he used. Though in truth he liked the feel he got from using the other man's given name rather than Deeks.

"No, you have a bedroll. Big difference. My bed has an orthopaedic mattress, would do wonders for your back." Deeks replied completely bypassing the fact Callen had called him Marty, though he did like the sound of it coming from him. He had spent so much of his life being called Deeks, being called Marty by someone he was used to hearing the other name from sounded good. It sounded like something he would like to hear again. That he would like being called Marty rather than Deeks. In fact it might well be something that he would want in this new life he was building. In the new him he was becoming.

"My back is fine." Callen responded with a sigh. That sounded like something Sam would come out with. The big guy was always on at him about getting a proper bed.

"For now. You aren't getting any younger." Deeks replied smugly. After all he was almost a decade younger than the other man, and therefore it was perfectly within his rights to say such a thing to him.

"Thanks." Callen answered with a deadpan tone as he shook his head. He wasn't that old.

"Wait you sleep on a bedroll?" Frank asked interrupting the conversation with a frown on his face. He knew how uncomfortable those things could be, and he knew no one would willing choose to sleep on what amounted to nothing more than the floor. Not if they were sane anyway.

"You have no furniture?" Henry asked almost at the same time. He couldn't understand that, though maybe Callen had only just moved into an unfurnished place. He couldn't see any other way that someone wouldn't have anything in their house.

"Welcome to the strange wonder that is G Callen. He's had his house for pretty much as long as I've known him, and he still doesn't have any furniture in it." Deeks explained with a wave of his hand which clearly told the other two men to not even try and understand it. It would be much better for their mental health if they didn't try to figure out the mystery that was Callen. Of course that never stopped him, but still. That was different.

"I have a chair. And a lamp." Callen argued back good-naturedly. He had enough furniture for him, did he really need any more? Not in his way of thinking he didn't. Especially as it prevented people from visiting him, just the way he liked it.

"Wow, last of the big spenders there." Deeks chuckled back, making sure there was no offence in his words.

"I don't need stuff." Callen tried to explain, though he knew the younger man understood what he meant by that sentence more than anyone else ever had. Not only did he know Callen, knew his history or lack of it, and he had walked away from all his things. Yeah, he was pretty sure Deeks understood better than anyone else could right then.

And Deeks did. But he also knew Callen wouldn't want to get into a conversation about his own past right then. Therefore he replied, "Yet you are going to be using mine." In a cheeky tone.

"Only because it won't all fit in the garage." Callen responded innocently.

"So you say." Deeks answered back with a roll of his eyes, before a yawn surprised him, causing him to open his mouth wide.

"I do. Now, I think it's time for bed. I need to drive back to LA tomorrow." Callen replied, giving Deeks an excuse why he wanted to sleep, and therefore removing the chance the younger man would have to argue with him. Because he knew if he didn't, Deeks would.

Deeks thought for a second before agreeing, he too was tired. It had been an emotionally draining day. Therefore he agreed with, "Okay, yeah. We should probably go to bed." Before turning to Frank and Henry and continuing. "Please tell me you are not expecting us all to share your bed tonight? Cos, while it may be big, I'm thinking four might be pushing it." He was hoping on one hand that they would let him sleep in his own room that evening, while on the other not sure how he felt about sleeping in a room with a busted lock. He hadn't actually gone up there since that morning so he had no idea what state it was in.

"No, even I think all of us sharing would be too much. Frank has had the door fixed and a new lock put on. Here's the key, and we have the spare so Frank won't need to go all macho on it again." Henry replied pulling the new key from his pocket and pushing it over to the younger man.

"There is no need for you to come if-" Deeks started to say. Wanting them to know that they didn't need to come if he had another nightmare. He knew he would at some point, and he really didn't want to hurt anyone else. In fact he would much prefer to deal with it himself. At least then the only person who would be in pain was himself. But before he could finish his sentence, before he could think of a way to put into words what he was thinking Frank interrupted him.

"Yeah, kid. There is. Though now I know not to approach you until you wake." He said, stating clearly that there was no way they would be leaving Deeks alone, even if it was that they sat next to him and tried to talk him out of the horrors his own head produced.

"Or we have Callen on the phone." Henry tacked on at the end. He well remembered how Deeks had come out of his nightmare at the sound of the other man's voice, and he knew he wouldn't hesitate to call him again if they needed to. Just as he knew the other man would gladly take the call. In fact he was pretty sure Callen would be most unimpressed if they didn't call him.

"Guys, seriously, there is no need-" Deeks started again, trying to tell the other three that he was fine dealing on his own. But once again he was cut off.

"Zip it. This is not up for debate." Frank interrupted gruffly. This was not up for debate in his mind. They would be there for their son when he needed them, because that was what parents did.

"I suggest you give in gracefully. And I'm more than happy for you to call me, any time." Callen added smiling at the fierceness in the older men's eyes. They would make sure Deeks was okay, and he knew they would call him when it was needed. And he was fine with that.

"Don't encourage them." Deeks groaned, but he knew resistance was futile.

"Why not? I told you I am here for you, always. I meant it." Callen responded looking straight into Deeks' eyes so he would know he was completely serious. He meant every word and he wanted to make sure Deeks knew that as well as the others at the table.

"Fine. Then I guess this is goodnight. Come on Monty, bed time." Deeks replied deciding that he might as well concede defeat gracefully and all that. He knew this was something he would never win, not when it was three against one. Especially not when one of those three was Callen with that protective look on his face.

With that agreed upon, the four men shared a round of goodnights as the younger two headed towards the stairs which would lead them up to Deeks' room.


	15. Chapter 15

**Hello again my dears. I would like to thank** **Guest and amywegner16** **for the wonderful reviews. As such I have decided to give you another chapter.**

 **I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS: LA.**

* * *

Arriving at the room Callen grabbed some clothes from his go bag and made his way to the bathroom, leaving Deeks to settle Monty and get what he needed to prepare for the night. When he came out Callen moved to sit on the bed turning out all the lights but the bedside lamp as he waited for the younger man to go and brush his teeth and do his nightly routine.

It wasn't until Deeks came out that Callen noticed something was off with the other man. Because as much as he knew Deeks was tired, he kept seeming to find things to do in the room. Things that would put off going to bed. For a minute Callen was confused, wondering what was wrong, wondering if Deeks somehow felt uncomfortable about sharing a bed with him all of a sudden, but then it hit him. Deeks wasn't uncomfortable about sharing a bed, he just didn't want to go to sleep. He was scared of what would happen when he closed his eyes. And Callen realising this, couldn't help but wonder how many nights Deeks had been like that since he was taken. Couldn't help the guilt that settled inside him at the thought the Deeks had been sacred to sleep for so long, and had no one to help him. But he pushed that aside. That didn't matter now. What did was that now Deeks was not alone. Therefore moving to the edge of the bed he waited a few seconds before the Deeks tried to walk past him. At that moment he reached out, striking with the skill of snake to grab the younger man's hand in both of his.

"Come to bed, Marty." He said softly, even as he applied enough pressure to the hand in his own to make the other man turn towards him.

"I just have to-" Deeks started to say, but Callen was having none of it.

"No, you don't. You need to sleep." Callen replied sternly. There was no question of it being a suggestion in his voice. It was an order.

And Deeks looking into Callen's eyes knew he couldn't put it off any longer. So instead he took a deep breath and closed his eyes for a moment, hoping it would help him gain his equilibrium. Then he looked back at the man sitting in front of him. "Okay." He responded softly.

That one word was all Callen needed to guide Deeks to the bed, pulling him down so he was lying under the covers on the side closest to the wall. Once he was there Callen didn't even try and stop himself from wrapping the younger man in his arms, spooning him as he had done the last two times they had shared the same bed. The only difference being that this time Deeks was awake as he eased his arm under his neck and carefully settled the other around his waist.

"Night, Marty." Callen whispered as he snapped off the light. And as the darkness surrounded the pair he couldn't stop himself from leaning forwards and pressing a sweet, gentle kiss to Deeks forehead, before settling back down, his nose pressed into the other man's hair.

Deeks felt his breath catch as he felt the closeness of Callen. As he felt the soft kiss drop onto his skin. It was different to the other time Callen had done it. Then he hadn't been… himself. But now, lying in bed with the older man pressed against him, Deeks was definitely all there. He didn't know what that kiss meant. Was it Callen's way of reminding him he was there for him if he had a nightmare… or was it something more? And Deeks being Deeks knew he couldn't sleep with that question going round in his mind. Therefore he decided to put words to his thoughts in the dark that surrounded them.

"Any chance you'll do that on my lips?" He asked making sure his cheeky tone was prominent in his voice, though he didn't doubt that Callen would be able to see through it. After all G Callen had always been the one person who could see through his words.

And Callen, lying there tensed slightly. Not so much from the question, but more the underlying tone that told him that Deeks wouldn't say no if he did. But he couldn't, as much as he wanted to. Deeks wasn't ready for that, neither of them were in truth. Not after all that had happened. But he knew he had to answer, and for once in his life Callen decided to answer honestly. "Maybe, one day." He said softly, yet in a serious tone so Deeks would know he meant his words. "But for now, sleep." He continued pulling Deeks closer to him as he did so.

"Night, G." Deeks whispered in response. And as he closed his eyes there was no mistaking the smile on his lips at the words the other man had spoken. One day. Yeah, he could wait, and maybe… one day.

* * *

They both woke the next morning, neither mentioning the conversation they had had in the dark. They had no need to. Instead they both got up and got ready for the day to begin. It was only then that Callen realised he had run out of clean clothes in his go bag. Damn it. He hadn't properly filled it since the last time he came here, and now he didn't have any tops to wear. Therefore turning to Deeks he asked, "Any chance I can borrow a tee? I've run out."

"Sure." Deeks replied before going to his draws and looking through them. Of course he didn't have many himself, what with not exactly packing much when he left LA. Therefore the only choices he had were a couple of checked shirts, one which he would be wearing behind the bar himself during the day.

"So, blue or red?" He asked holding them up to Callen with a sunny smile.

Callen took one look at the shirts and wondered if he would get away with wearing one of his used tees for the journey home. I mean it wasn't like anyone was going to see him right? But when he opened his mouth to say that, he made the mistake of looking into Deeks' eyes. And he knew he couldn't say no to the offer of clothing, even if it was a checked god damn shirt. "I'll take blue." He replied instead deciding it was the best out of the two options he was given.

"Good choice, it matches your eyes." Deeks responded with a smirk. He knew Callen didn't want to wear either of them, and as such was going to take great delight in seeing him in it. Not to mention the fact he rather liked the idea of Callen wearing his clothes.

With that decided they both got dressed, matching checked shirts and all.

* * *

Frank couldn't help but burst out laughing when he saw them both enter the bar. The matching shirts was one thing, but there was also the fact that Callen was broader in the shoulders that Deeks, and as such it pulled rather tightly across his chest.

"Nice shirt, Callen." He finally got out, though he was still chuckling.

"Oh I don't know. I think it suits him." Came Henry's voice from the door to the kitchen breakfast plates in hand, not that that stopped him running his eyes over the very pronounced muscles on display.

"Hey babe, behave." Frank replied through his tone was still full of humour. He knew his husband meant nothing by his words after all.

"A guy can look, right? Especially when it is so well displayed." Henry responded winking at Frank even while he waggled his eyebrows at Callen.

"That's it, I'm changing." Callen replied with a sigh. He should have expected this.

"Come on, G. You're only driving back to LA, no one is going to see. Plus I like it." Deeks cajoled from beside him, placing a hand on his back as he guided him to the table.

"Fine. But only because I'm hungry." Callen replied moving to sit at what it seemed had become his seat at the breakfast table.

"Can't let you go hungry now, can we?" Henry responded placing down the plates as Frank added coffee to everyone's seat. And with that the four of them tucked into the food, enjoying a pleasant morning together before they all went about their day. Enjoyed the casual conversation and friendly teasing that chased away any thoughts of the horrors that had brought them all together.

* * *

Callen left soon after breakfast, a brown bag of lunch once more in hand. He drove back to LA with a smile on his lips as he remembered the company he had left, a smile that grew as he munched on the sandwiches Henry had made for him. He had forgotten about how he had supposed to be a work the last two days. Forgotten about calling in sick. Therefore it felt a bit like a brick had hit him when he pulled into his drive only to find Sam waiting for him. It was only then it all returned, and he remembered the bad situation with the team and Hetty he had left without a backwards thought when he went to Deeks' aid. Taking a deep breath he took his time turning off the engine of his car and pulling out the keys. In that time he made sure his mask was firmly in place. He couldn't let Sam know where he had been or who he had been with. His partner didn't need to know, and more importantly, Deeks didn't need him to know.

Therefore getting out of the car he gave Sam his usual crooked smile. "Hey, Sam. What you doing here?" He asked casually.

"Well I came round to see if you were okay. Of course I did that yesterday as well. Where you been, G?" Sam asked trying to keep his worry and anger in check as he spoke.

"I went to see a friend, then fell sick. I'm feeling much better now." Callen responded innocently as he walked towards his front door.

"Right. So when exactly did you go see this 'friend'? And why are you only now coming back?" Sam asked though there was a demanding undertone to his voice.

"I told you, I was sick. Can't drive when you're sick." Callen replied, addressing the last question and hoping that he could get away with ignoring the first.

"Okay, even if I believed you, which I don't. I want to know why you thought you could go see a friend between me dropping you off at close to midnight, and then us starting work again the next day." Sam responded following Callen as he made his way into the house. He didn't take his eyes off his partner. He wanted answers and he wanted them now. And that wasn't even covering what the hell G thought he was wearing. Because Sam knew that shirt was not part of his partner's wardrobe. Which led him to believe it had to come from the 'friend' Callen had been to see. Had his partner really blown off work for a couple of days booty call? I mean really? It was the only answer Sam could come up with right then… Though studying the shirt as he followed G he couldn't get the idea that he had seen it before out of his head. Who the hell's was it?

"Drop it, Sam. I was sick, I'm better now and will be back at work tomorrow, okay?" Callen replied with a sigh. He really didn't need this right now.

"You know Kensi and I had to do the work of four between the two of us. It's bad enough Deeks left but you-" at that Sam stopped himself as the memory came back to him. He suddenly remembered where he had seen that shirt before. It was on a certain detective that had resigned. A certain detective who had left them high and dry. A certain detective who had saved his life and not given Michelle up, even under torture. Taking a deep breath he calmed the conflicting emotions rolling through him. Now was not the time to blow up. He had been sure Callen knew where Deeks was, but he had never had any proof of that fact. And the way his partner could evade questions he didn't want to answer had made sure he didn't get any. Until now. Now the proof was staring him in the face. But he knew if he railed at G for keeping Deeks location a secret he would get nothing. So letting out the breath in a long slow smooth go, he spoke in an even tone. "So, how Deeks doing?" he asked, and Sam couldn't quite feel bad at the startled tensing reaction that caused in his partner.

"I told you, Sam. I don't know where Deeks is." Callen replied determined to maintain his cover. He knew Deeks wasn't ready to see anyone else. He would protect him, even from Sam.

"That's crap, G. you're wearing his shirt." Sam stated simply, crossing his arms as he stared into his partner's eyes.

Damn it, Callen thought. He knew he shouldn't have worn this damn shirt. But he knew it was too late now. Sam would never believe it was his. Therefore with a sigh he dropped the lies. "He's okay. Had a rough night."

"And that took two days to sort out?" Sam asked raising his eyebrow, his mind already working on why G had been gone for so long. Was Deeks so far from LA it took hours to get to him? No. He couldn't see the kid running that far. There had to be another reason, so what was it?

"Wanted to make sure he didn't have another one." Callen replied. It was the truth after all, even if it was the complete truth.

At that Sam nodded. Okay, that made sense. Deeks didn't have the training they had had, he knew it had hit him hard. No doubt he would need someone there for him the night after as well. He just didn't understand why Callen was the one Deeks had called to help him deal with his 'rough night'. If anything he would have thought the kid would call Kensi, but he knew for a fact she had no more idea than he did where her former partner was. In fact from what he could find out, the only one in contact with Deeks was Callen. It didn't make sense to Sam, but he knew better than to question it. At least Deeks had someone, even if it was the most unlikely of the lot of them.

"All right. You'd better be in work tomorrow though, we have our new LAPD liaison starting." Sam responded, not being able to keep the displeasure from his voice. He really didn't see why they needed an LAPD liaison.

"Really?" Callen asked his eyebrows raising in surprise at Sam's words. It seemed Hetty had finally decided that Deeks was gone and was moving on. That was good for the team, though even as he thought it Callen couldn't help but wonder how he would feel having someone else sitting at the desk across from him. Having someone else in the place he would always associate with Deeks.

"Yep. Don't know anything else. Hetty is being real tight lipped about the guy." Sam replied with a shrug. And if he may have found out some information on the new guy, detective Jason Thomas, well he wasn't going to share it with his partner. If he'd wanted to know, then he should have been at work shouldn't he?

"Then I guess we'll see tomorrow." Callen responded in an unconcerned voice, though he couldn't help but worry. The job they did, the things they dealt with, LAPD detectives were not trained to deal with that. Deeks proved that. He didn't want to see someone else get destroyed doing their job. They would have been better off if Hetty had just given them another agent. At least they would have gone through the required training. He did not want the extra worry about the newest member of his team.

"Yeah we will. Get some sleep, G. And change your damn shirt." Sam replied before turning and leaving the house. He knew G was okay and he also knew he wasn't going all lone wolf on them. That was enough for him for now. And if he felt a twinge of worry for Deeks, Sam pushed it to the side. The kid had left, he wasn't part of the team anymore. He'd leave G to deal with him, it seemed to be what the other guy wanted after all.

And Callen, well he let out a sigh of relief that Sam wasn't demanding to know where Deeks was. Wasn't insisting they drive up there right now and bring him back. It seemed he had dodged that bullet. He just hoped he could keep doing so. Because Deeks was exactly where he needed to be right then, and Callen would do everything within his power to make sure he stayed there, safely away from the trauma that is the life he had led in LA.


	16. Chapter 16

**Hello my lovelies. I would like to thank** **Guest, heyjode, Lic. Lu, ssl7, anonkp and PirateGinge** **for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like how I've introduced the new guy (and like him), and I hope I have answered some of the questions you have had about Kensi.**

 **Also I'm sorry but this won't be becoming M for those that what it to be. I'm not very good at writing that stuff.**

 **Anyway Enjoy.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't NCIS: LA.**

* * *

Callen arrived at the mission early the next morning, his intention being to be the first in the office. But of course he was unsuccessful, something he realised when he saw Hetty already at her desk. Placing his bag down, he knew he needed to go and talk to her. Needed to let her know he was back from his 'sick days'. Get whatever she was going to say to him about his absence out of the way while no one else was around to hear it. Therefore he approached her office area with a smile on his lips. But before he could say anything Hetty did it for him.

"Mr Callen, I glad to see you back. You are feeling better I hope?" She asked looking up at the man approaching her office, a sincere smile on her lips as she did so. Though she couldn't help but smirk internally when she saw how her friendly manner caused Callen's steps to falter slightly. Well she was only human after all.

"Yes, Hetty, much better. Thank you." Callen replied easily as he slid into the chair in front of her desk. It seemed she was okay with him taking the time off then. He wasn't sure whether to be grateful about that or worried about what favour she was going to demand in return. Or more concerning, if she had found out the truth of his reason for being away, and exactly where it was he had gone.

"Good. Your return today is most fortuitous. Here is the file on our new LAPD liaison officer, Detective Thomas. He is starting this morning." Hetty responded, ignoring all the questions she could see flashing across Callen's eyes. She had decided she wasn't going to pry, and she was true to her word. He had needed time away from them all and she had given it to him. Now he was back, and she was helping his team back to full strength. Yes, everything could go back to how it should be now.

"Then I best go read this, then hadn't I?" Callen replied smiling as he reached across and took the file from her. With it in hand he stood and moved back to his desk, settling down with a cup of coffee before opening the folder.

He scanned the contents. The first was the standard information about the man joining his team. He was in his mid-thirties and had been an undercover detective mainly working with the gang unit and narcotics. That caused his eyebrows to raise. That was hard, dangerous undercover work. But then he registered the previous work history and understood why detective Thomas had been chosen for such cases. It seemed that after college he had done four years in the marines, repaying them for the education they had given him. Okay. So this guy wasn't a total civilian. He had training that would be useful to the team, as well as being able to bring the insight of a true detective to their cases. Yeah, he could see why Hetty had chosen detective Thomas to join their team.

* * *

Sam walked into the office that morning and couldn't stop the smile that appeared on his face at seeing Callen sitting at his desk. "Morning, partner." He said as he started unpacking his bag for the day to come.

"Morning, Sam." Callen replied closing the file he had been reading. Something that caught Sam's notice and as such without preamble he made his way across the bullpen to read the name on front of it.

"Detective Thomas. Good marine, from what I've heard." He responded with a smirk at the eye roll that gained from his friend. After all he was the one who had told G that they were getting a new LAPD liaison today, and he was also the one who had neglected to tell him anything else. Well teach him to keep secrets now wouldn't it?

"And just where did you hear that, Sam?" Callen asked raising his eyebrow, though in truth he wasn't surprised that Sam had done his homework on the new guy. Just as he wasn't surprised that he knew who he was. Nothing remained a secret in this office for long, no matter how hard you tried.

"A friend of mine out at Pendleton." Sam replied with a shrug, moving back towards his own desk. It wasn't like it was difficult to find out info on a guy who had served after all.

"Right." Callen nodded before turning to open his computer. He needed to check his emails and see just what he had missed the last couple of days.

* * *

Kensi woke early. Looking out at the sun shining through her window she decided to go for a run rather than the gym that morning. As such she tried very hard to have a pleasant time pounding the pavements listening to her music, and resolutely not thinking of the way her life had changed over the last few weeks. Refused to think about the pain she felt at her partner disappearing on her. Refused to think how much it hurt to consider the idea she would never see Deeks again. And most of all refused to think of the betrayal she felt at knowing Deeks didn't trust her to help him in this time. Refused to consider how she felt at knowing Callen was the one he had turned to, rather than her. Oh she knew she was over-reacting. Knew she was being stupid. After all Callen had been ordered to find Deeks by both Hetty and Bates. She couldn't really fault him for doing his job. Nor could she fault him for helping out her partner when he found him, though she confessed it was a shock to overhear him discussing Deeks moving out of his apartment with his building manager when she had gone round to do her weekly check to see if Deeks had returned. It had made it all seem so much more real when she had heard that conversation. He wasn't coming back.

Then of course there was the way the manager had insinuated that Deeks and Callen were together. That was completely crazy, right? There was no way anything was going on between the two of them. I mean Deeks had kissed her, right? But still she couldn't silence the little voice in her head that suggested that maybe, just maybe things had changed now. That without the constraints laid on both the men from being part of the team that certain things she had seen but dismissed, had come out into the open.

She had seen how sometimes Deeks would look a man over as he would a woman, though not as obviously. No doubt he thought he was being completely discrete, but she was a trained federal agent and his partner. She saw, she knew. She also knew that Callen didn't really care about the sex of his partner, it was an open secret at the office, and it was a thing that had been made use of once or twice in cases they had worked before Deeks joined them. So yeah, she had noticed how they both had given each other appreciative looks across the bullpen. But really, she never thought anything of it. Never thought anything would come of the slight attraction she had seen. But now, now she couldn't help but wonder.

And she couldn't help but feeling really bad for doing so.

Deeks needed help. He was going through more crap than she could even start to comprehend. He needed a friend right then, one that understood. And while she didn't know much about Callen's career history, it wouldn't surprise her to learn he had been tortured himself. Therefore it made sense Deeks would reach out to the one member of the team who knew where he was and what he was doing. It made sense. It didn't mean anything. But even these rationalisations didn't stop the feelings gnawing at her.

Then there was today. The day she met her new partner. The day she had to develop a new relationship with the guy watching back. This would be her third partner in the last five years. What did that say about her that she had gone through so many? I mean, look at Callen. He was the ultimate lone wolf, yet he and Sam had been together for longer than she had known them. What was wrong with her that she couldn't keep a partner? And would this new guy stay, once he knew that truth?

She didn't know anything about him, Detective Thomas, not really. Though Sam had let slip that he'd been a marine. That relaxed her slightly. She knew how to deal with marines. She was a marine brat, and had been engaged to one. Marines were her comfort zone. At least this new partnership had that going for it. She still remembered the start of her and Deeks' partnership. How they didn't gel, didn't understand each other enough to have the relationship they needed to trust each other with their lives. At least, hopefully she would have something in common with Thomas.

As she returned home she realised she had spent so much of her time on her run trying not to think about everything, it was all that had crowded her mind. She needed to stop. She needed stop thinking about Deeks and what might have been. He was gone, and he was not coming back. She needed to move forwards. Today was going to be a new start for her, she needed to treat it as much. She needed to take everything that she and Deeks were, and put it in a box. It was over, and it was time she accepted that.

And with that thought she went to get ready for the new day.

* * *

Detective Jason Thomas had been surprised when Bates had called him into his office to inform him he was going to be the new liaison officer to NCIS operation of special projects. He wasn't sure how he felt about that. I mean if he had wanted to become a federal agent he would have joined NCIS when he left the marines. Instead he had joined LAPD, wanting to give back to the community he had grown up in. But it seemed there was no getting out of this new assignment, and he knew full well how to follow orders. Therefore back straight and head held high he arrived at the address he was given that would become his new office. He looked round the building and couldn't help but smile at the Spanish style of it. It called to his distant Hispanic heritage. He liked the idea of working here.

Moving towards the door he was greeted with a small woman. Bates had told him about her. Told him about Hetty, and he knew he needed to give her as much respect as he would give a two star general. As such he bobbed his head in lieu of a salute as he spoke. "Ma'am."

"Please Detective Thomas, call me Hetty." The lady replied with smile on her lips. Oh yes, he was completely different to Deeks, and yet just as good in his own way. He would be exactly what her team needed.

"Of course, Hetty. It is a pleasure to meet you." Jason replied holding out his hand for her to shake.

"A pleasure that is returned. Come let me introduce you to the team." Hetty responded turning and leading the way through the doors. They walked down the corridor, and as they did so she pointed out the different rooms and corridors leading to other parts of the building, though she did not show him round. She would leave that to his new partner, it would give both him and Kensi time to get to know each other without the prying eyes of the rest of the building.

Jason followed, listened and memorised the words she said with only half his brain. The other was thinking over the people he was going to meet. As soon as he had found out he was going to be joining this team he had put in a few calls. He'd found out that agent Hanna was a former SEAL, and a damn good one at that. From all he heard he respected the guy already. Was ready to follow him without question. His soon-to-be partner Agent Blye he had also heard a lot about. She had a long history with Pendleton and the marines, and everyone he spoke to gave him a good impression of her. It was agent Callen he hadn't been able to get a beat on. When he mentioned the name to some people they clamped up, refusing to say a word, whereas others just shrugged and shook their head as if to say they couldn't think of any way to describe the man. He had found out enough to know the guy had worked for every alphabet agency going, and from what wasn't said he deduced the guy was a ghost. A spy. As such he couldn't help but find himself intrigued by the man who so few actually knew.

Finally they came out into an open area and as they did so Jason found three sets of eyes trained firmly on him. He couldn't help but tense with the intensity of the stares, of knowing that these people who were to be his new team mates were watching and categorising, that they were already making judgements about him due to the way he stood and the look on his face. This was worse than any undercover he had ever done, and that was saying something. But then that was probably because he knew that these people carried within their hands his life. They were the ones who would have his back and vice versa.

"Gentlemen, and lady, let me introduce our new LAPD liaison Detective Jason Thomas. Detective Thomas, agents Hanna, Callen and Blye." Hetty said gesturing as she said each name so he could put the right face to each one. Not that he needed her to do so, it was obvious who was who. Even while he sat Agent Hanna's military baring was obvious while Callen slouched, and Blye, well she was the only female there.

"Pleasure to meet you all." Jason replied moving into the bullpen and shaking each of their hands as he continued. "Please call me Jase, Jason or Thomas. I'll answer to any of them." With what he hoped was a friendly smile on his face.

* * *

Callen watched the new guy. Watched how he tensed when he arrived and straightened into a parade stance unconsciously. Watched how he turned first to Sam and then Kensi, before approaching him. He knew it was because they were nearest to the entrance to the bullpen, but he did find it interesting that he greeted the former SEAL before his new partner. He imagined it was because Sam was the one who he would feel the most comfortable with, what with his previous career and all that. Therefore when he got to him, Callen stood with military precision as he smiled in return and took the hand offered. "Welcome to the team, Thomas. Your desk is behind you. Once settled I'm sure Kensi will be happy to show you around." He said with a clipped tone and smirking to himself at the confusion his behaviour was having on the new guy. Oh yes, this could be fun. After all if Leroy Jethro Gibbs had taught him nothing it was once a marine, always a marine.

"Thank you." Jason replied, managing to cut himself off before he added a sir to the end of that sentence. Callen radiated command and it shocked him how the guy had gone from slouching disinterest to commanding in a split second. He really was everything none said about him. That was for sure.

"Of course." Kensi agreed readily. She liked the idea of showing this guy around. Getting to know her new partner. And if her eyes found themselves travelling up and down his attractive 6ft1 body, well she was only female. Who couldn't look at that? At the way his dark hair was longer than regulation, but still nicely styled, nor the way his smile made his eyes light up with a friendly sparkle. And as she sat there looking at her new partner she suddenly found it a lot easier to make sure the box containing Deeks was kept shut. This guy was nothing like him, and she couldn't even being to compare the two. But watching him she realised she already felt comfortable with him. She recognised the military tells, and they eased her as nothing else ever could. Yes she could see herself getting on very well with her new partner.

And Callen watching as these thoughts crossed Kensi's eyes signed with relief. At least she would be able to move on with this guy. Would be able to find an easing the tension that had held its grip on her ever since Deeks left. At least now he didn't need to worry about her, or at least, not more than he usually did. And if he did find himself tensing slightly as Thomas sat at Deeks' desk. Settled into a place that was now his, Callen refused to look into the feelings behind it. After all he was the one who had let Deeks leave, he had no one but himself to blame now there was another man sitting in his chair. He was just going to have to deal with it, and if the idea of still being able to see Deeks outside of work helped him cope, well there was nothing wrong with that now was there?


	17. Chapter 17

**Hello my lovelies. I would like to thank Lic. Lu and heyjode** **for the lovely reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So this chapter is set directly after season 5 episode 4 'Resnikov, N.' and I know its short, but I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS: LA.**

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Deeks woke feeling refreshed and ready to start the day. It had been just over a week since he'd had the nightmare that had brought Callen tearing driving out of LA in the middle of the night. Just over a week since he had finally talked about what had happened to him, and how it affected him. He knew there was still a long way to go, and he knew he would get more nightmares in the future, but that sharing… he couldn't describe how he felt now he had finally done it. He thought the best description he could come up with was the idea of sharing the weight that had been crushing his shoulders, but that wasn't what he had done. Callen didn't share anything, he'd just listened. It seemed that alone made Deeks feel… lighter somehow. Made him feel as if he could breathe freely once more, that he could move forwards, that there was an end to the pain. Perhaps it was less the sharing of his ordeal, perhaps it was more about the fact he had finally confronted it. Had finally accepted it had happened, put words to the feelings and thoughts he'd had and stopped locking them in a box and trying to bury them deep inside. Yeah sounded right, and he couldn't help but chuckle to himself when he thought that, considering it was almost the exact words Nate had said to him when he was still in LA. The words he had completely ignored.

There was another thing that had changed over the last week. He could now think of his former team. He didn't feel any of the guilt or remorse he expected to feel when he remembered them. Oh he still wasn't ready to talk to anyone but Callen, but at least now he accepted that someday he might be. That someday he would be able to return to LA and see them, be able to someday once more call them his friends. Maybe, hopefully, someday.

So yeah, on balance he was doing better. It seemed deciding to walk in the sun was the right move after all, because he had finally faced his shadow that was walking at his side.

Pulling himself out of bed he smiled at Monty as he grabbed his jogging gear. He felt like a run today, maybe he would go across the cove and try and tackle the cliff path on the opposite side. It didn't look as steep as the one close to the bar, and even if he knew looks could be deceiving with cliff paths, he didn't think this one was a lie. It didn't seem that steep when he drove down it to get to here. Surely it would be better, right? With that plan in mind he left the bar by the back door aiming to cross the parking lot before hitting the sandy cove. It was there that he got the first hint that his morning was not going to go the way he had planned it.

The car stood out considering the only others there were his own and Henry and Franks old pickup. Hell that Merc would stand out in a lot of parking lots. But it was less the car itself and more its owner that sent alarm bells ringing in Deeks head. Because he knew for sure that it hadn't been there when he went to bed last night. He knew that because he had slept alone. So no, Callen had not been there last night. Which meant he must have arrived sometime between one in the morning and the six it now was. What Deeks didn't know was why Callen had once more driven through the night to be there. No one had called him that he knew of, there had been no reason to. So there had to be something else. But what?

Of course the obvious way to gain an answer to that question would be to ask Callen himself, but looking around he couldn't see the man. Therefore with a frown on his face he made his way round to the front of the bar, wondering if Callen was sitting on the steps waiting or something.

But he wasn't. Instead Deeks found him when he turned towards the cove. He was sitting in the sand, about half way between the bar and ocean. Even with the distance separating them Deeks could see Callen was shaking, though whether that was from the cold morning he had possibly sat through, or something else he had no clue. But that didn't matter. Instead without even thinking he made his way over to his friend, making sure he and Monty made enough noise so that Callen would know they were there. He did not want to end up on his ass after all.

"Hey, Callen." He said quietly, though keeping his tone cheerful as he sat. He could see out of the corner of his eyes the tear tracks that were drying on the other man's face. That scared him more than anything else ever could. Because he didn't think he had ever seen Callen cry, couldn't think of what could cause the strong man he knew him to be to break down. Well no that wasn't true he could think of a few things, and none of them he wanted to thank you very much.

"Deeks." Callen replied running a hand down his face in an attempt to clean the tears from his skin. He hadn't meant for Deeks to find him like this. He'd planned to go up to the bar when he was sure everyone inside was wake. But of course he had forgotten about how the younger man didn't sleep for so long anymore. Had forgotten how he was usually the first awake between the three men who lived in the bar behind him.

"What happened?" Deeks asked softly, trying to keep the fear out of his voice. Because he wanted to know, and he knew if Callen thought it would upset him he wouldn't share. And Deeks needed to know. Needed to know what had happened to the team. Needed to know who was hurt… and needed to know if it was his fault for walking away.

At that Callen took a deep breath before responding in a monotone voice. "Yesterday I watched my father executed right in front of me."

"G… how… what-" Deeks asked trying to find the words to string into a sentence, but at a loss to do so. That sentence was such a momentous one he didn't even know where to being to start addressing it. Luckily it seemed Callen could read his mind because he answered the main question Deeks had on his mind, even if he didn't know how to put it into words.

"The remaining Comescu's." Callen responded, in a way that said that explained everything. And well, to Deeks it did. He still remembered the trip to remain he had taken with the team to rescue Hetty. The trip where Callen discovered so much more about himself. The trip which was filled with so much blood.

"Shit." He breathed under his breath. He knew if the Comescu's were involved then the body count was going to be high. But Callen's father? The one he had never met? The really didn't seem fair to him. It really was a completely cruel twist that Callen would first see the guy as he was executed by those had taken so much away from him already. By the same people who had killed his mom. How the hell did anyone deal with that?

"He wasn't really my father, but they thought he was. I thought he was." Callen continued explaining, needing to say it all now he had spoken those first words. Needed to tell someone so it was clearer in his own head. At that thought Callen turned to the younger man the tears once more coursing down his cheeks but he didn't make a move to remove them. He couldn't. "I tried so hard to save him. But it didn't work. Instead a man is dead, and I know my father's name." the bitter sweetness of it all was not lost on him. He had gained a piece of information he had been searching for for so long, but the cost had been a man's life. Why did he have to pay the price in Callen's unwanted war? Why couldn't the Comescu's leave him alone?

Deeks couldn't think of anything to say to that. He had a thousand questions, but he knew Callen didn't need them right then. So instead he moved one arm around Callen's shoulders and the other across his chest, giving him a sideways loose hug, though it was more an expression to show Callen that he was not alone. Moving his chin so it was resting on Callen's shoulder and he yet he could still meet his eyes if he turned his way, he asked the only thing he felt was right to then. "What's his name?"

"Nikita Alexsandr Reznikov. He was a major in the KGB, and he helped people escape to the West." Callen replied with a small smile on his lips at finally having a name for his father. And as he spoke it the grainy black and white image he had seen on the old film the previous evening came to mind. The only memory he had of the man who was his father captured forever on a film almost as old as he was.

"He sounds like a good man." Deeks responded sharing the smile at the wonder in Callen's voice at finally having a name to use. At finally knowing who his father was.

"Yeah. He was arrested at the same time as I left Romania. There is no record of his death. The man that died, he was one of the people he saved, and in return he watched over me and my sister. He had so many photos from my childhood. I've never seen so many. It's…" But Callen trailed off at that and instead moved so he was looking back out at the ocean in front of them. He didn't have words to describe what he had found on the case he had just completed. Didn't have words to describe the emotions going through him.

And Deeks understood. He couldn't imagine how it felt to go from having nothing about your past to finding not only your father's name but photos of a childhood you barely remembered. So rather than saying anything more he moved to drop a soft kiss onto Callen's cheek before returning his head to his shoulder, though this time he rested his cheek upon it. It was only seconds later before Callen bent his own head to rest against Deeks'. And that was how they sat, letting the ocean do the talking for them, and letting it soothe the emotions and thoughts running through their minds. They just sat there, with Deeks holding Callen loosely in his arms and the older man's head resting upon his, a silent show of solidarity for Callen while his world got turned upside down once more and settled upon its new axis.

And that was how Frank found them when he came out for his surf an hour later. He didn't know what had happened, didn't know if Deeks had called Callen or if the guy had shown up by himself. But he did know one thing, and that was that Henry was going to need to prepare another plate for breakfast. With that in mind he returned to the bar to inform his husband of their guest and decided to forgo his surf that morning. Decided to leave the beach to the boys for now. It seemed they needed it more than he did that morning. He would give them that time. He was sure they would learn why Callen had come to visit soon enough. If nothing else he could see in his husbands eyes that Henry really wanted to know.


	18. Chapter 18

**Hello my lovelies. I would like to thank** **Lic. Lu,** **heyjode, anonkp, Max and Fern 4ever and Beepmybanana** **for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **I would also like to mention that as I live in the UK I won't be watching the next season until it comes on TV here in January, so please no spoilers in your reviews.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS: LA.**

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It was Monty lifting his head and sniffing towards the bar that pulled the two men out of the world they had been inhabiting. Caused them too, to turn towards the building at their back. They could see Henry and Frank moving around inside, and Deeks knew the couple well enough now to know that they were setting up from breakfast.

"Come on. Food." He said to Callen, giving him a gentle push as he removed his arms from around him before standing and holding out his hand.

"Yeah." Callen agreed using Deeks help to pull himself up, wincing slightly as his muscles protested him finally moving after he had been sat in the same position in the cold for at least the last three hours. Damn he wasn't as young as he used to be. He thought as he stretched out, bringing heat back into his body, and waking up the parts that had fallen asleep.

Once they were both ready they turned as one towards the bar.

* * *

Frank had been on his way to tell the boys that breakfast was out when he saw them stand and turn to head in. He wasn't sure if it was some innate sense which they both had from doing the jobs they did, or had done in Deeks' case, or if there was another reason for their perfect timing. Watching how they were being led by Monty he found himself tending towards the latter option. And when Monty came in and made his way straight to his bowl that Frank had just filled, he felt that was a pretty safe bet.

"Callen, good to see you. Here for a break?" He asked smiling at the older of the two men. It didn't escape his notice how his eyes seemed slightly red, nor the bags and shadows under them. But he also knew better than to press. Now was not the time to gain the answers he sought about why Callen was here, though at least he now knew it was for himself rather than Deeks he had returned.

"Got a couple of days off. Thought I'd come see how you all were." Callen replied with a smile of his own, making sure his mask was firmly in place, even if he could see that Frank didn't believe it for a minute. Or at least that was what the look in his eyes said.

"Perfect. I'm sure we can find you something to keep you occupied while you're here. How good are you at cooking?" Henry asked tilting his head as he studied the man in front of him giving the impression that he was wondering if he could recruit him. He had seen the same thing Frank had, and as such knew better than to question Callen right then. But maybe if he got him into the kitchen, with just the two of them, maybe then he could get the guy talking. It had worked for Frank and Deeks behind the bar after all, why not for him and Callen in the kitchen? And well, you never know, maybe one day Callen would retire up here with them too. They really did not need another person on the bar, and he really did need to start training someone up to take over when he and Frank had had enough. He did like to plan long term, and it hadn't escaped his notice that Frank already had Deeks behind the bar, so…

"Terrible. But I can follow orders, and could probably chop up things." Callen responded with a cheeky grin as he could just imagine how Sam would look at the idea of someone wanting him to work in their professional kitchen. And as he did so he felt the thoughts that had been plaguing him on the beach slowly retreat in the face of the two men in front of him. In the face of the homely atmosphere they both projected without thought. In the face of the family he was with.

"Yeah right." Deeks muttered with a chuckle at Callen's words as he moved to take a seat at the table.

"Hey, I can chop." Callen defending himself, commented back. Though truthfully he wasn't initially sure that was true. He'd never really tried, both Sam and Michelle had always refused to let him help in the kitchen when they were cooking after all.

"It wasn't the chopping I was referring to, G. It was the following orders." Deeks responded with an unrepentant shrug. He knew Callen too well to believe for a minute he would follow any order he didn't agree with.

"The sensible ones I follow." Callen responded simply. I mean there was no point following the ones that didn't make sense, now was there?

"True, but I would have to ask whose judgement on sensible you're using. Because yours? Not so great." Deeks replied back happily falling into the usual bantering conversations that he had with the other man when he was around.

"Coming from you, that doesn't say much." Callen answered back without hesitation, smirking as he did so as he found himself completely forgetting everything but the joy of being here, with these people.

"I'll have you know, my judgement is awesome." Deeks replied in fake affront. If he'd been standing he would have put his hands on his hips, but as he wasn't he settled for glaring at Callen. Though it was ruined somewhat by the fact he was also shovelling eggs into his mouth as he did so.

"Really? So running away from LA and quitting was a good idea?" Callen answered back without thought. Though as soon as the words were out of his mouth he winced at them. They were definitely not the right thing to say. He was just about to apologise, to try and find a reason for saying what he had but before he could Deeks replied.

"The best one I ever made." He said in a serious voice, looking at Callen with a frown in his eyes. Though not at his words, but more wondering why it was he had said them. Why Callen had brought that up now, so many weeks later, when he knew that being here was the best place for him. What had happened to cause Callen to question that decision? Because he knew something had. Callen was happy he had left and found Frank and Henry, so what had changed?

Callen saw the look and put down his own cutlery while he tried to work out his own mind. Because Deeks was right. He knew this was the best place for him, just as he knew that leaving was the best decision the other man had made. So why would he say that? It was then he remembered the feeling he had when he watched another man, another LAPD detective take Deeks' desk. Remembered how he had tensed and refused to look deeper into the why. Hmm, he probably should have, but now was not the time to be thinking about that. Instead he responded in a deceptively causal tone as he watched Deeks out of the corner of his eyes. "Not sure Detective Thomas agrees with you on that one."

"Jase? What's he got to do with it?" Deeks asked frowning at that. He knew who detective Thomas was. You couldn't really do undercover for the LAPD and not know the others who did it as well. So yeah, he knew Jason Thomas. He just had no idea what he had to do with Callen or him leaving.

"He's our new liaison. Got thrown pretty much into the deep end on our last case." Callen replied carefully, wondering how Deeks would feel to know that Hetty had replaced him. That the team had moved on, even if he was the one to walk away.

"Yeah." Deeks responded not really listening beyond the fact that Jason Thomas was now LAPD liaison to NCIS Office of Special Projects. That he now had his old job. Nor could he stop the slight twinge he felt at that. The tensing it caused to go through him at knowing he had been replaced. At knowing there was no chance he could ever go back. Not that he wanted to, but somewhere at the back of his mind it had been there. A safety net ready to catch him and bring him back into the fold of the team he'd once called family.

It was a strange mixture of emotions that flowed through him, and while before he would have put on a mask and laughed it off as he locked them into a box, now he did neither. Instead he let himself feel. Let them run their course through him until his mind came out the other side with a calm he wasn't used to feeling. But it was one he knew that he could well become addicted to. The idea of actually allowing himself to feel, and process his emotions… yeah, that was something he actually really liked. Who knew it made you feel this good? Therefore turning to Callen with a smile he finally spoke into the silence that had descended around him as the other three men there waited to see how he would take Callen's words.

"He's a good guy. Good cop. what do the others think?" He asked, stealing himself to hear the team's names, to hear her name. He couldn't hide from this, he needed to confront it, wanted to confront it.

"Sam likes him. Though that could be more the military background than the guy himself." Callen responded cagily going with the one he hoped would cause the least pain to Deeks.

"I can see that. The wonder twins? I'm sure they have an opinion." Deeks replied with a smile, though he knew he was a chicken. He'd meant to ask about Kensi but changed at the last second.

"Haven't really talked to them about it. In fact haven't really talked to them since I asked them very politely to stop trying to track you down." Callen responded with a shrug, though in truth it had been him they had been trying to track, on Sam's request when he'd gone AWOL on his 'sick leave'. He didn't want then finding out where he had been or why, they had had no need to know about Deeks and what he was going through. Though he couldn't help but wonder why it had been so hard for them to find him. Sure he'd turned off his phone, but that was after he had arrived. And he hadn't considered turning off his car GPS until he was pretty sure it had been too late. So why …?

"Politely, huh?" Deeks asked with a raised eyebrow deciding not to think about Eric and Nell trying to track him, nor what Callen had done to make sure they couldn't. I mean he was pretty easy to find he was sure, he hadn't done anything to hide after all. So Callen had to have done something, but what Deeks didn't know, all he knew was that he was thankful that he had.

"Very." Callen corrected. He had been very polite, when he had informed the tech-two that he would prefer to keep his private life just that, private.

"And your laptop hasn't blown up on you yet?" Deeks asked both eyebrows raising at that. He knew Callen when he was being 'polite' and he doubted Nell would take it well. And where she led, Eric inevitably followed.

"That's more Kensi's style. They are far sneakier. They'll wait until I lower my guard before they strike." Callen replied with a shrug as he went back to eating, not really concerned about what the terrible twosome would do. Mainly because he had a feeling he wasn't the only one to speak to them, and Hetty was a hell of a lot scarier than he was.

"True. Nell is a cunning evil genius and Eric's her right-hand man." Deeks agreed also turning back to him breakfast. The silence that surrounded them was pressing, as if the elephant that was in the room was standing right in front of them. Because it didn't escape anyone's notice that there was one member of the team they hadn't talked about. Even Frank and Henry knew that Deeks' former partner had not been mentioned. Therefore as he finished his food Deeks decided it was time to bite the bullet. He knew Callen wouldn't tell him unless he asked, so that was exactly what he was going to have to do.

Taking a deep breath for courage Deeks asked, "So how is Kensi taking Jase as her new partner?"

"They seem to work well together." Callen replied not sure what else he could say. He didn't want to go into detail about how easily it seemed the detective and junior agent had fallen into a partnership. Didn't want to highlight the difference between how difficult it had been for Kensi and Deeks when they had first been getting to know each other. Deeks didn't need to know that. That was nothing to do with him, not any more.

At that Deeks nodded. He could read between the lines better than most and he heard what Callen didn't want to say. He wondered if he would feel jealous at the idea of Kensi having a new partner. Jealous of the idea of her having someone she could work with. Jealous at the idea she had replaced him. But instead all he felt was relief that she wasn't out there on her own. He knew deep down he could never trust her to be her partner again, could never have that kind of relationship with her again, but he didn't want her put in danger. They had meant too much to each other, had too much history for him to want that. Therefore he responded honestly with a small smile on his lips to Callen's words, both those spoken and un-spoken. "That's good. I'm glad she has someone watching her back."

And Callen sighed in relief at that response. Sighed when he looked into Deeks eyes and saw acceptance there. He'd been so worried it would hurt the younger man, that knowing that it didn't eased something he hadn't even known was tense inside him. Allowed him to think that maybe when he returned to work he would be able to look across at Thomas doing his job and not think he was sitting at Deeks' desk. No maybe for the first time he would be able to think he was sitting at his own. In fact Callen was so busy thinking that that he didn't even register when he mouth opened widely in a yawn.

"Did you get any sleep last night before you came down here?" Deeks asked with a frown. He knew Callen hadn't slept when he arrived, but surely he had before he came, right?

"Wasn't really in the mood." Callen responded with a shrug, but even as he did so he started to feel as if his eyelids were heavy. The good food he'd eaten for breakfast and the relaxing company he was in were combining to remind him he really did need to get some sleep, and sometime soon.

"Right. Finish breakfast, and then you are going to bed, mister." Deeks responded pointing a finger at the almost empty plate before directing at Callen.

"Yes, sir." Callen responded with a smirk, though he did turn back to the food in front of him. And as such missed the soft smiles shared by the two men who had watched and listened to Callen and Deeks, both deciding it best for them all if they did not get involved in the conversation that they had. Not to mention they had learnt so much more from not interjecting.

* * *

That was how Callen found himself being carolled up to Deeks' room after breakfast via his car, where he grabbed not only his go bag, but also the box of photos he had liberated from the office at the end of the case. He wasn't sure why he'd brought then with him, but when he left the house, needing to just go… somewhere after watching the home movie, he'd grabbed the box on his way out the door. Though now he had discovered where it was his mind had decided it needed to be, and more, who it decided it needed to be with, he could understand its thinking. He liked the idea of sitting down with Deeks and talking through the history the photos told. Talking through his history in a way he had never done before in his life. Yes, that idea sounded perfect to him. It gave him a peace he hadn't found since the start of the case that had brought him his father's name. And it was that peace that helped him drift off to sleep in Deeks' bed.

And Deeks, well he watched Callen fall asleep and couldn't stop his eyes travelling across the features of his face. From mapping how he looked in slumber. The frown lines and worry disappeared, and his masks were finally down. And Deeks couldn't help but notice there was an eternal quality about Callen in such a situation. Maybe it was just that he knew the older man trusted him completely due to how easily he'd fallen asleep with him at his side. Maybe that was what gave him that impression. But whatever it was Deeks didn't really care, no he was too busy taking it all in. Absorbing all that was an unguarded G Callen, as well as letting his mind fly. Letting himself think over all he and Callen had discussed and the feelings he'd felt while they did so before concentrating back on the man beside him. Coming back to the reason he was there.

It was only then that he realised as he hadn't before, that Callen had come to him. He could have gone to any of the team or Hetty, but no, he'd come to him when he was in turmoil. It seemed he wasn't the only one in their friendship who needed the other at times. That realisation made him smile. Because for the first time he realised that this was not one-sided. No, Callen needed him just as much as he needed him. And that made the last bit of residual worry at well everything, flee from his mind. Because now he knew, he wasn't alone any more. Neither of them were.


	19. Chapter 19

**Hello my lovelies. I would like to thank** **Beepmybanana, Guest, heyjode, Please (Guest), anonkp and amywegner16** **for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **I just wanted to say I don't know if American food safety rules are the same as those in the UK but I have based this chapter on the knowledge I have from running kitchens in the UK. I hope it works. Anyway here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS: LA, nor any of the lines I have taken from the show.**

* * *

Callen work to an empty sunlight room. Turning to grab his phone he saw he'd been asleep for almost five hours. He knew he probably should try and get some more, but he never was one for sleeping for long periods of time. Instead he pulled himself up so he was sitting on the bed, wondering what to do now. He knew Deeks would be working the lunchtime shift behind the bar right then, just as he knew he could go down and join him, keep him company when he had no customers to serve. But Callen didn't really want to do that. That was when he eyes rested on the box of photos that were now sat on the side of Deeks' kitchenette. Climbing up he grabbed the box and returned to the bed, and opened it. The last time he'd gone through these photos it had been with Kensi and Detective Thomas while they were looking for clues as to who had the man he'd thought could be his father.

He hadn't really had a chance to properly look at them. Not then. But now he did.

With that thought he carefully took the lid off the box, but rather than reaching for the different bundles of photos it contained he just stared at them. This was his childhood. Memories captured forever, the good and the bad. With a sense of awe at the treasure that was now his, he reached in and took out the first pile, gently shifting through the photos, shifting through the goldmine he had in his hand.

The memories came with the images, but as he moved through the bundle he couldn't stop the frown forming on his face. There was no order to the pictures or memories, and it was playing with his mind. As such pulling himself out of the past the was reflected in each image he set about organising them in a way that would make the memories clearer, make the timeline of his childhood coalesce in his mind in the way it should, and not with random jumps between the years.

* * *

Deeks finished his shift, but rather than return straight to his room and Callen, he took Monty out for a quick walk. After all the dog had missed the one they had planned for that morning what with finding Callen on the beach. As such they both needed the exercise in Deeks' mind. He went up the cliff he'd planned to explore that morning and was glad to find that he was right, it wasn't as steep as the other. Once he gained the top he stopped to stare out at the ocean that swelled below him, taking in the beauty of its untamed nature and the call he could hear on the wind. Nothing could ever be as good as the feel he got from seeing it. This, right here, was prefect, and Deeks was so glad he'd found it. And by it he did not just mean the physical place he was standing. No he had found so much since arriving here. He had found a part of himself he hadn't known he'd had, and he found a peace he'd never known he was searching for. Here, now, he'd found the Deeks he wanted to be and that was something he never wanted to lose. Something he would fight with every part of his being to hold on to tight. He was never going to lose himself again.

Turning from the ocean he moved on, with the aim of walking along the cliff for a couple of miles before heading back. But before he got as far as he'd like he started to see evidence that he was not alone in landscape as he wished he could be. Because there up ahead of him was the local town. He hadn't realised it was so close, but then he hadn't actually ventured into it yet. Frank and Henry always got him anything he needed when they went in. Looking at it nestled around the mouth of a river it looked rather picturesque. An idyllic haven for those that wanted more society than the cove the bar inhabited offered. But he wasn't ready for that. One day he would venture down there, go and have a look at place, but not now. No now he would return to the cover he knew and loved. Go back to pretending there was no one but those that were there. Go back to G.

With that thought he turned and started a gentle jog back home.

* * *

Callen had just finished piling all the photos by year, some of which he'd had to get off the back as he couldn't remember exactly when he was in certain homes, especially the ones he was only in for a couple of days. But now they were ranged around him. A small pile of photos for every year between the age of three and eighteen. There were less after that, a couple from college, before nothing until the photo that was taken while he visited his sister's grave. But then he hadn't expected anything different. He'd never had a career that was conducive to someone secretly following his movements and taking picture after all. With that he sat back and looked at the evidence he now had of his childhood, looked at the memories he now had. Memories that he could now share. It was at that moment the door opened and Deeks entered, carrying two plates of sandwiches Henry had shoved into his hand as he'd walked past the kitchen.

"Whoa." Deeks said when he saw all the photos on the bed arranged in a semi-circle around Callen who sat in the middle.

"Hey." Callen responded looking up with a smirk, enjoying the surprised look on Deeks' face before continuing. "These are all the photos Reinhardt took while he was watching over me for my father." he explained.

"Wow. That's a lot of photos." Deeks replied putting down the food and moving towards the piles and moving to pick up the one nearest to him, though he did hesitate and look at Callen before doing so. He wanted to make sure it was okay for him to touch these priceless items of Callen's past. When he received a small nod from the older man his hand continued its journey and picked up the photo. "When was this one taken?" He asked as he looked at the picture in his hand of a child G in baseball gear.

"1980." Callen answered, before feeling the need to expand on his answer. He wanted to share with someone his memories, therefore he continued. "I was 10 years old. Bakersfield. That was the McPhersons, they had a trucking company and they were my tenth foster house. I was only there for a few weeks, but I actually liked her. I used to help her with her gardening."

"What about him?" Deeks asked when Callen didn't say anything else.

"Not so much. Used to beat me with a broom handle. Or he did until one day I took it out of his hand and broke it over his head." Callen replied simply.

"He got what he deserved then." Deeks responded with a nod. He knew all about needing to defend yourself against an abusive father, he'd shot his own to save himself and his mom after all.

"They moved me after that." Callen continued nonchalantly.

And Deeks hearing that wished that it hadn't taken Callen having to take his own defence into his own hands for him to be moved. He should never have been there in the first place. But he also knew that back then abuse happened more often than anyone wanted to think about for children in care. Therefore rather than saying any of the things on his mind he carefully climbed onto the bed and picked up a photo from a different pile and asked Callen about that one instead.

And that was how they spent the next few hours, Deeks choosing random photos, allowing Callen to share the memories he had of the people who had been in his life at that time. Share stories from his childhood that he had forgotten until confronted with a visual reminder. Some were happy or funny, but others were sad or down right disturbing. But not once did Deeks stop the other man from speaking. He knew Callen needed to do this, just as he'd needed to talk through his torture. Oh he knew that the two situations were nothing alike, expect for the fact they had both been repressing the memories. As such he knew it was now Callen's time to find the catharsis from sharing all that he has kept locked away for years. It was time for him to learn how his past had shaped who he was. Time to remember his history.

* * *

Later, when it was time for Deeks' second shift to being for the evening rush, both men made their way down to the bar. But when they got to the door that led to the bar Callen stopped.

"You coming in?" Deeks asked when he noticed the other man was no longer following him.

"I was thinking of seeing if Henry wanted a hand in the kitchen." Callen responded. He really didn't want to sit at the end of the bar that evening. Not when the only thing he would have to occupy himself is the memories he had been going through with Deeks. No what he really needed right then was something to do. Something to take his mind off of what they had talked all afternoon about. He needed time to sort through the emotions that had been raised, and deal with the other memories that were pressing in on his mind, by allowing his mind to think of other things. He needed to process.

"Okay. I'll see you in a bit then." Deeks replied understanding completely what Callen wasn't saying, though he did have to wonder how long it would take before Henry kicked Callen out. He hadn't survived half an hour in the kitchen with the chef, and he knew how to cook. He didn't see it going well with Henry and Callen. But hey, that was for the other man to discover for himself. It was that thought that caused the smirk to appear on his face as he made his way into the bar.

"Just what's that look for?" Frank asked seeing Deeks come in, but also taking notice of the lack of Callen following him.

"Callen's gone to offer his assistance to Henry. I was just wondering how long he would last. I give it 15 minutes, 30 tops." Deeks replied moving behind the bar with the other man, starting his jobs without thought.

"I don't know, I think he'll be able to hack it. I mean Henrys got a soft spot for him, so, that'll help." Frank replied with a smirk of his own, though his was more because he knew his husband would do everything he could to keep the other man with him in the kitchen. They had discussed Callen while Deeks was with him that afternoon. Had discussed how to help him through whatever it was that had caused him to arrive on their doorstep with red rimmed eyes. They had both agreed Henry would be the better one of the two to help him, if for no other reason than Frank would be in the restaurant that evening with Deeks behind the bar, not to mention the questions customers would throw at Callen if he was working in the bar. At least in the kitchen Henry was the only one Callen would have to deal with, and Frank knew his husband would not press the other man for any information. No in fact Frank was pretty sure it would be the complete opposite. He hoped Henry would be able to help Callen ease whatever was on his mind, if only for a little while. And Frank knew the man he loved, he was able to read people. Not the same way Frank did, but more, be able to understand there emotional state and give them what they needed. Not to mention how he had ways to make people do what he wanted. So no, he really didn't expect to see their guest until the end of the night.

"Want to bet?" Deeks responded unaware of the thoughts going through Franks mind. All he could think of was the fact that as far as he knew Callen had never really cooked anything in his life, and he was now in a professional kitchen with none other than Henry. The man who got pissed at even his husband when he tried to help him. Yeah, he couldn't see it lasting.

"Sure, 20 bucks." Frank answered without hesitation.

"You're on, old man." Deeks agreed. And as they shook on the bet they both had gleeful grins on their faces, sure they were in the right and the other was going to lose, badly.

* * *

Callen enter the kitchen and was suddenly surrounded by the delicious smells coming from the pots and pans that were bubbling away on the stove. He couldn't tell you what any of it was, but it smelt good. And knowing Henry's cooking, he knew it would taste even better.

"Henry?" He called to the man who had his back to him.

"Callen. Finally decided to join me have you?" Henry responded with a smirk as he turned, putting down the knife he had and wiping his hands on the cloth tucked into his apron strings.

"If you want me to." Callen replied with a shrug.

At that Henry nodded before moving towards the store cupboard at the back of the kitchen where the clean linen was kept. Coming out he had in his hand a set of chef whites. "These should fit you. Go change then come back." He announced handing them over the rather startled man. Callen had not realised he would have to wear different clothes to work in the kitchen. He was pretty sure only chefs wore these, and he certainly wasn't one of them. "Can't have you contaminating the food wearing your outdoor clothes. Go." Henry continued when Callen just stood there holding the clothing he'd handed him, making shooing motions with his hand as he did so.

And Callen, well he did the only thing he could do, he went to get changed. Once he returned he found himself being given and a fast, yet in-depth introduction into food safety and hygiene, the dos and don'ts of working in a kitchen, or more specifically Henry's kitchen. It was a good thing he spent his life learning information quickly so he could maintain a cover, otherwise he was pretty sure he would have been lost after the second sentence. But he managed to keep up, just.

It was watching Henry as he went over it all that was the real eye-opener though, because this was a side of the man he had never seen before. This was his domain, his to control and in this kitchen his will was law. He barked things out in a way similar to that of a military training officer, and god forbid anyone who forgot anything he was saying. It made something inside Callen respond automatically, and eased the remaining tension that held him in its grip. Because here he was not in charge, here he did not have to think. No, here he just had to do as he was told. Here, in this kitchen if Henry told him to jump, he was expected to ask how high.

Now sure he'd had many jobs over his life time where that was true. But this was the first time in his life Callen didn't want to question any of the orders he was given. Because here, for the first time in so very long he was doing a job he knew absolutely nothing about. He'd done no prep on it, had no cover to maintain or skill set to lean back on. And it was the most refreshing experience he'd had in a very long time.

It was not half an hour after returning to the kitchen that Callen was chopping the carrot batons that were to be a side dish on offer that evening. Henry had told him they had to all be the same, had shown him how he wanted them, and then left him to it. Callen had never realised how difficult it was the cut carrot batons all the same before now, but damn, it was hard. It took his complete concentration and the application of every skill he had ever learnt with a knife, well almost all of them, the throwing of them with deadly accuracy really wasn't that useful for this, though he was considering otherwise when his knife slipped once more and the baton widened. But no, he would not fail. He could cut damn carrots.

Henry for his part watched Callen out of the corner of his eye, smiling happily when he saw how seriously he was taking the task he had given him. He hadn't been sure of how this would work out, no matter how much he and Frank had both agreed it was a good idea. He did not like sharing his kitchen with many people. Oh he'd had trainees and other staff before, but they had all been trained to do as he ordered, and they all understood exactly what he required of them. This was the first time he'd had a complete novice sharing his space and he was surprised at how well it was working. He'd known Callen wasn't stupid, but he'd been impressed with how quickly he'd learnt all the information that he'd thrown at him throughout the last half an hour. He had cottoned a lot quicker than Henry had expected him to, and when he'd asked him to get a chopping board for the carrots, Callen hadn't even hesitated in picking up the correctly coloured one. Yes, the federal agent had so far impressed him greatly, and he suddenly understood just why he was so good at his job. If he could impress him in half an hour in his kitchen with no previous knowledge of the job, he could only imagine how formidable Callen would be when given a background on the new career and situations he infiltrated.

Moving towards his new helper Henry stood just behind him, looking over his shoulder to see how he was doing. He was impressed with the uniform sizes Callen had managed to get. "Very good. We'll move on to the potatoes next." He said without warning, though unlike the others he'd had in his kitchen Callen did not jump at the sound of his voice. But then he was pretty sure that Callen had known exactly where he was in the kitchen even while he'd had his back to him, Deeks had been the same when he first started after all. Their awareness of all going on around them was something Henry knew he would never understand, but then he didn't have to.

"Sounds good." Callen responded smiling at him over his shoulder before turning back to his cutting, enjoying the warmth the praise Henry had given him had created. This was something he'd never done before, cooking. It was something he believed he would never be able to do, but it seemed Henry thought differently. And okay sure all he was doing was cutting up vegetables, but hey, everyone had to start somewhere right?

With that the two settled into a working routine, with Henry showing Callen what he wanted him to do and then leaving him to it, confident it would be done to his exacting standards. And Callen, well he threw himself completely into every task he was given, using every ounce of his mind to learn the skills he needed to complete them correctly. It was exactly what he needed to stop the thoughts that had been pressing in on him after the conversation he'd had with Deeks. And if he also found himself enjoying creating the dishes for the customers, well that was an added bonus in his mind.


	20. Chapter 20

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank** **Lic. Lu,** **Beepmybanana and Max and Fern 4ever** **for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, it's a long one. I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS: LA.**

* * *

Hetty sat at her desk and watched the two remaining members of her elite team working away in the bullpen. She was glad to see that Kensi and Detective Thomas were obviously working well together. Glad that she had made the right choice when she had decided to add him to the team. But that wasn't what her mind was mainly focused on. No that was the absence of her team leader. Oh she knew Callen was on medical leave, just as Sam was. After all they could expect nothing else after being close to an explosion and in a car accident respectively, but she had not expected Callen to obey the edict. In fact she had expected to see him that morning smiling innocently at her as he promised he would remain on desk duty, a promise they both knew he would not keep.

But he hadn't been there, and that worried her. Not that she would let anyone else in the office know, but still… she couldn't help wonder what he was using his medical leave to do. After all the last time she had seen him she had confirmed the name of his father. She would not be surprised to find out he had gone to Russia to investigate further. But she really hoped he hadn't. She hoped he was spending time was Sam, who she knew would take his medical leave, if only because she had informed Michelle of it. But still she worried. With a sigh she turned towards her computer and not for the first time was tempted to try and trace her boy. But that was not a responsible use of government resources. She knew she could not do that. No all she could do was sit there and wonder.

When the end of the day came she found herself close to breaking, and as such she determinedly shut off her computer and left the building. But as she got into her car she did not drive home. Instead she found herself making her way towards Callen's own. She just wanted to check on him, that was her excuse. She just wanted to make sure he really was all right after all that had happened on their previous case.

But when she pulled up outside Callen's house she found it in darkness and his car missing. That did not bode well in her mind. She briefly thought of going to Sam's. Going to see if he was there, but she did not want to worry the other man if he was not. Therefore she made her way home. But once through the door she realised she could not carry on this way. She needed to know. As such, much against her better judgement, she pulled out her tablet and pulled up the program that would let her track her agents. She tried to reason with herself that it was purely for Callen's safety, but she knew it wasn't true. Not that that knowledge stopped her from tracking his phone and cars GPS.

The results she got surprised her, though she had to wonder if it really should. At least he wasn't in Russia looking for his father. No he was once more at that bar in the middle of nowhere. Looking at the flashing points informing her of where her agent was she couldn't help but wonder what it was about that bar that had drawn him back once more. Because she had checked his files, and as far as she was aware he had never worked with Detective Frank Monroe, and his husband had even less of a reason to know her boy. So, why? What was it there that kept pulling him back? What was it about that place that had caused him to phone in ill when she knew he wasn't? And what was it about the place that had caused him to run there now, when he had discovered such important information to him, when he'd discovered his father's name?

Hetty wanted answers, but she knew she could not seek them right then. Because she knew if she turned up at the bar the next day Callen would not be happy with her, and that was putting it mildly. Therefore she was going to have wait for him to return and then go and investigate. Three days. That was how long he had left on his leave. She would greet him and Sam back, and then she would go and find out just what this place Callen kept running to, had that drew him back. Yes, she just had to wait three days, and then all her questions would be answers, she was sure of it.

* * *

Callen came out of kitchen just after it had officially closed, two plates in his hand. He had prepared his and Deeks dinner and he was inordinately proud of that fact, even if he had had Henry standing at his shoulder talking him through the whole process of cooking the salmon and preparing the sauce, though the carrots he could say were completely his work. He couldn't wait for Deeks to try it. Couldn't wait to prove to someone that he actually did have skills in the kitchen, despite what Sam thought.

* * *

Deeks was wiping down the bar when the door opened from the kitchen. He expected it to be Henry bringing him his dinner now Frank was back from the restaurant. Therefore he didn't bat an eyelid at the man who walked through wearing chef whites. Or at least he didn't until he registered just who it was. Because there was no way that was Henry. He couldn't help himself from freezing for a moment as he stared at his former team leader, standing there holding two plates of food, looking so much like this was his life as much as it was Deeks' own. But then he blinked and shook the thought from his head. Because G didn't belong here. Therefore with a chuckle in his voice he spoke.

"Nice outfit, G." He called out causing the other man to frown at him.

"Behave or I'll take your dinner back to the kitchen." Callen responded, half turning towards the door as if he was going to do just that.

"I meant you look great. Totally suits you. You should wear it more often." Deeks backtracked quickly. He was really hungry, and well, Callen was wearing a uniform, even if it wasn't one he'd ever imagined he would see him in.

"Okay." Callen replied with a smile turning back towards the seating area of the bar and moving towards their usual table, the one that could see all corners of the place they were in. He'd forgotten about his change of outfit during his shift in the kitchen. He'd been too immersed in learning everything he could from Henry to even think about it, until Deeks' words that was at any rate. But hey, here this was more inconspicuous than the gun and badge he using carried.

"You know, you cost me 20 bucks." Deeks said conversationally as he brought over the cutlery and drinks for them both. Arranging them on the table so they were sat next to each other without thought.

"And how did I do that?" Callen asked with a raised eyebrow as he sat, not sure how he'd managed to cost Deeks money.

"I bet Frank you'd be out of the kitchen within half an hour." Deeks grumbled in response as joining Callen on the bench sitting close enough that their elbows brushed slightly as he pulled his plate towards him.

"That'll teach you to bet on my behaviour then, won't it?" Callen replied with a smirk. He liked the idea that he had bested Deeks, even if he hadn't known he was doing it, it was still fun.

Deeks on the other hand just rolled his eyes at Callen's answer. You'd think he would know better than betting where Callen was concerned. That guy always found a loop hole. He still hadn't forgotten when he'd scammed him when he was practising his cards tricks on the support staff in the office back in his first year at NCIS.

"So it go okay? Henry didn't have you tied up in there, did he?" He asked to change the subject. He wanted to make sure Callen really had enjoyed himself working in the kitchen. I mean this wasn't his job, he didn't have to do it.

"Do you really think he could keep me this long if he'd tied me up?" Callen asked in disbelief that Deeks didn't have faith that he could have gotten out of such a situation within the four hours he'd been working in the kitchen. Did he not know him at all?

"Probably not. Not in a room filled with knifes at any rate." Deeks conceded. In truth he couldn't imagine Henry would be able to keep Callen a minute longer than he wanted to be there. Callen was the master at escaping things he didn't want to do after all.

At that Callen chuckled easily. This was good. Sitting down for a meal with Deeks after working harder than he had in a long time in the kitchen. Yeah, he liked this, a lot. He could see the appeal Deeks had for this place, though he knew he wouldn't be able to stay here permanently, unlike him. He was pretty sure he would get far too bored far too quickly if he tried. That was one of the reasons he liked his current job so much. No day was the same.

With that silence settled over them then as they both turned their attention to the food in front of them. Deeks had by then gotten used to Henry's cooking, but as he took a mouthful for the salmon and sauce in front of him he couldn't stop himself from groaning out, "Damn this is good."

"Thanks." Callen responded with a smirk, making Deeks look up at him with his mouth falling open. Because there was no way… right? I mean this was typical Henry fare.

"Wait, you cooked this?" Deeks asked wanting clarification on that. Because if he did, damn. That was definitely a plus to him. Any guy who could cook like this… well they did say the way to a guy's heart was through his stomach, and Deeks wasn't going to contradict that.

"Yep." Callen replied smiling proudly at his achievement. At doing something he'd always believed he never could. Okay so strictly speaking he'd followed Henrys instructions, but he'd done the cooking bit. That had to count right?

"Seems you have hidden talents, G." Deeks responded his eyes warm with the smile on his face as he stared at the man sitting next to him. The man whose food knowledge had only been take-out before that day. Because he knew no beginner could cook like this without some sort of talent for it, no matter what.

"More I had Henry watching over my shoulder." Callen replied shaking off the praise he could see in the other man's eyes. Okay sure it felt good having Deeks praise him, but he didn't want him getting the wrong idea. All he'd done was follow Henrys orders after all. It really wasn't that hard.

At that Deeks just grunted noncommittedly before holding Callen's eyes for a second longer, making sure the other man knew he didn't believe a word of it, before turning back to his dinner. The meal that followed passed in a pleasant peace between the two men as they enjoyed the good food they were eating, and the good company they were keeping. And if they also exchanged smiles and glances that had become so natural between the two of them, they certainly didn't notice.

* * *

Frank and Henry watched the two men from the bar. It didn't escape either of their notices at how close Deeks and Callen were sitting to each other, nor that they didn't seem to notice the lack of personal space they had given each other, not to mention the looks they kept sharing. If anyone who didn't know them had been watching them Frank was sure they would think they were a couple, though he knew they weren't, not yet at any rate. Thought he didn't think it would be long before they took that step. If only they didn't keep having real world crap to deal with, but that was life he supposed. Therefore turning to his husband he asked, "So how did it go?"

"Surprisingly well. He has good instincts. I will make a chef of him yet." Henry replied with a sunny smile at his husband. He really was surprised how much he had enjoyed having Callen in the kitchen with him all evening. He usually got fed up after a couple of hours, and that was with trained staff. "Though I did wonder if we'd have a knife stuck in wall at one point." He added, as he remembered the look of frustration Callen had had when he was cutting all the vegetables.

"Is the better or worse than broken sprit bottles on the bar floor?" Frank asked with a raise of an eyebrow as he remembered the Tom Cruise impression Deeks had tried to do when he'd first started working for them. Luckily it seemed he had stopped trying that. Or at least Frank hadn't caught him doing so lately.

"Not sure." Henry chuckled before continuing with a nod of his head towards the younger pair who were laughing together. "At least he seems better now." he said, though which of the two he was talking about he wasn't completely sure. He'd meant Callen considering how he'd been that morning, but he knew those words could well apply to Deeks as well. They both had so much pain they needed to deal with. He was glad they had each other to help them through it.

"Yeah he does. They're good for each other." Frank agreed. He wouldn't believe the Callen he saw in front of him was the same one he'd seen at breakfast that morning with red-rimmed eyes if he hadn't known. There was no sign of upset now. Frank had no idea what was going on with him, all Deeks would tell him earlier was that it was family related, but looking at the two men he realised he didn't need to know. It wasn't his place to know everything that happened in Callen's life, as long as he never hurt his son, then that was good enough for him.

"They are." Henry agreed watching them with a smile on his face before wrapping his arm around his husbands waist as he continued quietly, "They remind me of us, when we first got together."

"Yeah." Frank responded turning to drop a sweet kiss on his husband's lips before pulling away from him. "Don't you have a kitchen to clean?" He asked with a smirk and the raise of his eyebrow.

"Nah, that's the job of my trainee. Once he's finished eating I'll make sure he gets to it." Henry responded smugly making Frank laugh as he moved away from the man he loved to serve the customer who'd come up to the bar for another drink. He couldn't help but wonder just how long Henry would keep his trainee when it came to cleaning down the kitchen to his husbands exacting standards.

* * *

The bar was closed and Callen fell into his chair with a deep sigh of relief. In the last couple of hours he'd learnt more about cleaning a kitchen than he thought anyone ever needed to know. Hmm, that side he liked a lot less than the cooking. But he knew it had to be done, so he had stuck it out, cleaning the sides about a thousand times before Henry was satisfied. Damn he'd earnt his beer that night that was for sure.

"So Callen, how long am I going to have the pleasure of your company in the kitchen?" Henry asked when they were all sat, unwinding after a busy day.

"I have to go back in three days, so the next two?" Callen responded with a shrug. He might as well make himself useful while he was staying there, rather than propping up the bar.

"Excellent." Henry replied with an evil looking glint in his eyes as he rubbed his hands together as all good bond villains did.

"Not tomorrow night." Deeks interrupted before Henry made any plans. It was his night off after all, there seemed little point in Callen working when he wasn't in his mind.

"Why, got plans have you, Deeks?" Frank asked waggling his eyebrows at the younger man so all there knew exactly what he meant by that question.

"Yes." Deeks answered, though he knew his voice was not as sure as he wanted it to be. I mean, he really hadn't thought that far ahead. All he knew was he and G would do something together, the what was still allusive.

"If you want suggestions for venues, there is a lovely romantic restaurant in town. The food isn't as good as mine, but you can't have everything, and the ambience definitely makes up for it." Henry suggested slyly, watching how his words caused Deeks' eyes to widen.

"We going on a date, Deeks?" Callen asked joining in on the fun of teasing the younger man. Because seriously, he couldn't not.

Deeks looked at Callen about to deny it, but somehow it seemed his mind and mouth were disconnected, because instead he said, "If you want to." Well that was certainly not what he'd meant to say, at all.

Callen sat there stunned at Deeks' response. He hadn't meant anything by his causal words, but now the question was out there. The thin line they had both been treading ever since Deeks had left had finally been crossed. Now all he had to decide was whether he willing to join Deeks on the other side of it. Was he willing to agree to the idea of a date, and all it suggested about who they were to each other, when he knew he wouldn't be sticking around? I mean he would be returning to LA and who knew when he would next get the time to come up here. That was no way to have a relationship. It wasn't fair on Deeks or him, though he was pretty sure it would make very little difference to his own life. Except that his mileage would go up. But Deeks, he was starting a new life, away from LA, away from the job he'd done and person he used to be. Was it really fair to drag him back to it, even if was only via a connection with him? Okay sure, as friends they were still connected, but that was very different to being romantically connected.

And while these thoughts were running through Callen's head, similar ones were running through Deeks' as well. Though his were more along the lines of where a relationship with G would lead. He knew he would never return to LA and the life he'd had there, just as he knew G would never retire and join him here. So how would anything between them work? Sure they had feelings for each other, but were those feelings really enough? He honestly didn't know the answer to that. All he had was a certainty deep inside him that told him that if they didn't try, he'd regret it, just as he was pretty that if they didn't go on this date now, Callen would not return here for a very long time. No doubt for some noble reason like letting him get on with his life. But the thing was Deeks, wanted Callen in that new life, even if it was just a couple of days a week. Therefore he spoke again, before Callen could voice the decision he could see he was coming to in his eyes.

"Okay, don't call it a date. I mean I'm not ready to go out to town anyway, but maybe we could… I don't know, have a picnic on the cliff or something?" He suggested saying the first thing that came into his mind as an alternative to going to a restaurant. I mean they had to eat right? And he was pretty sure neither of them wanted to spend the whole night in the bar.

"A picnic, on the cliff, by moonlight? That's not a date?" Callen asked with raised eyebrows at the suggestion. I mean that sounded pretty romantic to him, but then what did he know? He didn't really do much dating that wasn't work related after all.

"Not if we don't want it to be." Deeks responded with a shrug. He didn't want to lose G, and if he needed to take back the idea of date to keep him, then he would do it. I mean whatever they called it wouldn't change anything. Neither of them were stupid enough to believe that the feelings his words had caused to rise in them both would go away just because they said so.

It seemed then that Callen had caught the disease Deeks had had moments earlier in the fact that his mind and mouth were not connected for the next words that came out of his mouth. "And what if we do want it to be?" He asked shocking both of them.

Deeks couldn't stop the massive smile that spread across his face at those words, once he was over the shock at any rate. As such he replied, "Then we'll figure it out as we go."

* * *

Frank and Henry had stayed resolutely silent during the conversation about the possible date. They barely breathed in case they caused the other two men to be pulled out of the conversation they were having. But with Deeks final words Henry couldn't stay quiet any longer.

"I will make you the best picnic you have ever tasted." He stated smiling broadly as his mind was already planning all the yummy morsels he would be providing for the pair. There were so many options, which was he to choose?

At his words both Callen and Deeks swung their eyes onto him. They had forgotten for the moment that they were not alone, that the couple was there watching and listening to every word they said.

Seeing the looks on their faces Frank chuckled as he decided to join in. "I'd best provide the drink then. I'm pretty sure I still have some of that decent German beer in the cellar. I'll dig it out for you tomorrow."

His words caused his husband to turn to him and one look in his eyes told Frank that Henry was already re-evaluating the picnic menu so the drink would complement it. He knew his husband well after all.

"You don't have to do that-" Deeks tried to protest, but his words died on his lips when both Frank and Henry glared at him. One was bad enough, but the both of them? Yeah, no. He wasn't taking that on.

"Of course we do, you're family." Henry stated simply. That was all the reason they needed in his mind.

"Looks like we're going on a date tomorrow night, then." Callen said smiling at Deeks. He still wasn't one hundred percent sure about this, but he also knew there was no turning back now. What would happen would happen. None of them could see the future, so there really was no point in worrying about it, too much anyway.

"That it does." Deeks agreed returning the smile, the same thoughts going through his mind. What would come would come, and hey, maybe he would finally get that kiss on the lips he wanted. And you never know, if he played his cards right, he might just get even more. And with that thought the excitement started to rise inside him. Tomorrow night he was going on at date with G, and he realised he couldn't wait.


	21. Chapter 21

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank** **Beepmybanana,** **melissastoner57, Amy (Guest), heyjode, amywegner16 and anonkp** **for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So firstly I am very sorry for the long wait. I was trying to get another one of my stories finished and then I had a massive writers block and really didn't want to writ eat all. But that has gone now. So really sorry for that.**

 **Secondly bonus points to those of you who pick up the bits about another role Chris O'Donnell once had. Sorry couldn't help myself putting it in, it was one of my favourite movies as a teenager.**

 **Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS: LA.**

* * *

The next morning dawned without a cloud in the sky but a stiff breeze coming from the ocean. Deeks taking one look out of the window of his room knew it was perfect surfing weather, but he didn't really want to leave G while he went. I mean that wasn't really the done thing, was it? Leaving your guest so you could go surfing. Of course it probably wasn't the done thing to have your guest working in the kitchens of the bar so there was that. Turning to look at the man who was quietly lying next to him he expected to see him still asleep, after all it wasn't even six yet. But he was surprised to find Callen wide awake smiling up at him. though he probably shouldn't have been, that guy never slept after all.

"Morning." Deeks said returning the smile somewhat sheepishly at being caught looking out of the window before checking on the man sharing the bed with him.

"Morning." Callen replied with a smirk as he read the thoughts going through Marty's head in his eyes. He was still amazed at how easy he found it to read the other man now. Amazed at just how many of his masks he had let fall away since he had come here, since he had started walking in the light. Amazed and overjoyed at watching the real Marty Deeks.

"So, what shall we do before breakfast?" Deeks asked resolutely turning his mind away from surfing.

"Well I plan on going for a run with Monty, if he can keep up, while you go surfing." Callen responded with a shrug.

"You sure?" Deeks asked, not being able to stop his eyes drifting once more to outside and the waves he could see crashing onto the beach.

"Very. I'm looking forward to seeing you in your wetsuit." Callen replied smirking now.

"Oh yeah? And any chance I get to see you in tight running shorts in return?" Deeks responded cheekily his eyes twinkling at the idea.

"Not today. But if you play your cards right tonight, maybe tomorrow." Callen answered giving Marty a waggle of his eyebrows as he climbed out of bed and headed towards the shower room.

"I'm hoping that if I play my cards right tonight I might just see you in less than tight running shorts." Deeks returned cheekily smiling widely as he found his eyes studying the other man's ass as he walked away.

"Only if you're very, very good." Callen responded with a wink before slipping through the door and closing it behind him, leaving Deeks with a warm glow inside from the conversation. A warm glow from the fact that there was no longer any self-imposed restrictions on their flirting, because tonight, tonight they were going on their first date.

With that thought in the forefront of his mind Deeks climbed out of bed and got himself ready for surfing.

* * *

Callen decided to go up the gentler sloping cliff for his run. Oh he knew he could go through the fields behind the bar and it would be easier. But he wanted to be able to see Marty. Wanted to be able to watch him on the waves. Therefore when he got to the top he stopped, something Monty at his side was very happy about, or at least that was the impression he got when the dog dropped to lie down at his feet. Chuckling at Monty's behaviour Callen turned his eyes to the waves below him. He could just make out Deeks lying on his board, paddling idly, until he turned. It seemed he had seen his wave. Callen stood there and watched him jump up, watched him ride the wave along the shoreline with the skill of someone who had spent half their life in the water. And as he stood there he thought over what the rest of the day would bring, namely the date he and Marty were going on that evening.

He still wasn't one hundred percent sure about it being a good idea, but he also knew it was far too late to change his mind. And the selfish part of him was looking forward to it. Looking forward to finally being able to express the feelings that had been growing for the other man ever since they had stopped working together. But it was selfish, he knew that. He didn't want Marty putting his life on hold for him, waiting for the few snatched moments he could spare between cases. Didn't want to have to cheat on him for work, even if he knew it was part of his job. He had seen how much stress that put on a relationship with Sam and Michelle, and they were completely in love with each other. How would it affect him and Marty? But no. He couldn't think about that, not right now. No use borrowing trouble as Hetty would say. I mean they were only going on their first date, it did not mean it would go any further, did it? And if it did, well they would cross that bridge when they came to it.

With that he pushed all thoughts out of his mind as he turned to run along the cliff path, Monty once more at his kneels.

* * *

The day at work flew by for both of the men, though they did find it entertaining how it seemed Henry and Frank were putting far more effort into organising their date than they were. Callen watched with a chuckle as Henry ran around the kitchen preparing not just the food for the restaurant that day, but also all the different dishes he had decided they must have on their romantic picnic. Though when he saw how much food he was preparing Callen did have to wonder if Henry expected other people to show up, there was far too much for just him and Marty, surely.

Deeks on the other hand just shook his head when Frank pulled out the German beer, dusting it off all ready for them to drink, though there was no way Deeks was carrying the whole case up the cliff. A couple of bottles would do fine he was sure.

Then came the end of their shifts, and to the amusement of both of them, Henry insisted Callen get ready in his and Franks apartment. They didn't really see the need, but neither of them said as much to the sometimes scary older man. Therefore that was how Callen found himself, a hour later, dressed in a long-sleeved t-shirt and jeans, knocking on Marty's door, 'picking him up' for their date.

"Hey, you look… pretty much as you always look." Deeks said opening the door with a smile. It felt a bit surreal, to be going on a date with G.

"Back at you. Ready to go?" Callen replied returning the smile. It wasn't like either of them were going to dress up for a picnic on the cliffs was it?

"Hey, I will have you know I spent hours doing my hair." Deeks responded with a huff and a flick of said hair.

"And you don't normally?" Callen replied cheekily, before grabbing Marty's hand in his and linking their fingers together. I mean it was a date, right?

And Deeks, well he was going to reply with some witty remark to Callen's words, but as soon as he felt the other man's hand in his he found it flew from his mind. So instead he called Monty to his side and the three of them made their way downstairs.

They managed to very quickly grab the food and drinks, as well as the blanket Henry had pulled out for them to use, and then they were out of the building, making their way towards the gentler cliff. Neither of them wanted to try and negotiate the steeper path in the dark later when the sun would have set and they would be returning.

They walked up the cliff path hand in hand, neither felt the need to say anything, though that could also be due to the slight breathlessness they were feeling, though whether that was due to the climb or the fact they were holding hands on the way to the first date, neither of them was completely sure. But finally they made it to the top. Once there they had to drop each other's hands so they could spread out the blanket, and take out the mountain of food Henry had prepared for them.

"Wow, did Henry think we were having a party?" Deeks asked as he kept pulling dishes out of the picnic basket they had been packed in.

"Yeah, it is a little overboard." Callen agreed grabbing a couple of beers and opening them, leaving Deeks to deal with the food, though he was rather keen to try it all. It had smelt amazing as Henry had been cooking it that afternoon.

With that a comfortable peace settled once more on them as they grabbed food, doing the dance of offering the dishes to each other and suggesting that the other try certain things because they were amazing. Though in truth it was all amazing and as much as they hadn't thought they would eat it all, by the time they were done all the containers were completely empty.

"Ohhh, I am so stuffed, I am not moving until morning." Deeks groaned as he lay down staring up at the sky that was starting to turn pink with the setting of the sun.

"Might get a little cold." Callen responded resting his elbows on his knees as he watched the sunset, beer in hand.

"You'll have to keep me warm then, won't you?" Deeks replied turning to look up at the man sitting next to him.

"I could do that." Callen answered turning towards Deeks so that their eyes locked and held, just staring at each other and for the first time without any shields or masks hiding the feelings they had for the other.

Then Callen's eyes flickered down to Deeks' lips and the younger man had to gulp at the meaning behind the movement. It was obvious that Callen wanted to kiss him, and while Deeks wanted that too, he wasn't ready for it, not right then. Therefore he tore his eyes away from the other man and pulled himself up, so he was sitting with his legs stretched out in front of him, his hand coming to rest on Monty as he gave him a stroke.

Callen noticed the sudden shift in air, noticed how Deeks was no longer looking at him and as such turned his eyes back to the sunset. He didn't want to push Marty if he wasn't ready, no matter how much he wanted to kiss him. Wanted to do so much more than just kiss. He would let Marty decide the pace of whatever it was that was happening between them. He was happy with whatever the younger man felt able to give, and if that was nothing more than holding hands and flirting, well maybe that would be better in the long run. Maybe.

"Wow, this has to be the quietest first date ever." Deeks said into the silence that had settled upon them. He had felt Callen retreat when he sat up and he was cursing himself for doing it. He wanted the easy friendly conversation back. He wanted the G that looked at him with such feeling in his eyes back.

"Well, what would you normally be talking about on a first date?" Callen asked turning to him with a smile. He hadn't been on a first date that wasn't work related for a very long time. And this wasn't your typical first date, was it?

"I'd find out about the person I'm with, but that seems a little pointless here." Deeks replied with a cheeky grin, as if he was daring Callen to contradict him.

"Oh I don't know. I'm sure there is a lot we don't know about each other." Callen responded with a shrug. It was true, I mean before Marty moved here they only ever really interacted at work.

"Yeah, but not really first date questions." Deeks agreed. I mean sure there were loads he wanted to know about G, they were the sort of things you found out by being with someone, rather than asking small talk style questions.

"Try me." Callen replied turning so he was facing Deeks head on.

"What?" Deeks asked with a frown, confusion in his eyes. What was G going on about now?

"Ask me some first date questions." Callen clarified with a smirk. He was going to enjoy this. If Deeks wanted a first date, well then he would give him a first date. And by that he meant the same sort of first date anyone would get if he dated them, anyone who didn't know who or what he was at any rate. If nothing else it would be fun coming up with crazy unbelievable answers.

Deeks looked at him then as if he was slightly crazy, but then he saw the gleam in Callen's eyes and he suddenly remembered all the first dates he'd gone on when he was an undercover cop. Remembered all the different stories he would tell people about himself, and well, yeah. Okay, time to see just how good G was at coming up with a backstory on the fly.

Turning so he too was facing Callen he nodded. "Okay." He said thinking for a second what to ask, but decided on going for the most obvious. "So Callen, what do you do for a living?"

"I'm in the circus." Callen replied without missing a beat. If he was going to do this he might as well go for the most outrageous thing he could think of.

"Really? And what do you do in the circus?" Deeks asked raising his eyebrow at the man across from him, trying to stop himself from laughing at the serious face Callen had as he said those words.

"I'm a trapeze artist." Callen responded again without hesitation, though he did find it hard to keep a straight face when Deeks choked on his beer at his words.

"So what? You wear tight fitting outfits while flying through the air?" Deeks asked not being able to stop the chuckle as he tried to imagine it. He really couldn't see Callen doing that.

"I've been known to." Callen responded laughing as well glad that he had managed to lighten Marty's mood. Glad that the slight shadow that had crossed over them before seemed to have gone again.

Deeks sat there watching as Callen laughed, watched as it lit up his eyes and he didn't even think as he moved. One second he was sitting across from G and the next he was kneeling in front of him, his hand cupping his jaw as he stared into his eyes once more. But this time he didn't let himself think or hesitate, instead he just closed the distance between them placing his lips gently on top of the older man's.

* * *

Callen had watched Marty moved, had sat perfectly still as he cupped his face, but as soon as Marty's lips met his own he moved. He couldn't not. His arms snaked around the other man's waist, pulling him closer so Marty was leaning against him, the hand he'd had on his face moving to his shoulder as his other rose to the other shoulder. And then Callen deepened the kiss, tilting his head to the side so he could run his tongue across Marty's lips, asking without a word for entrance. An entrance Deeks was more than happy to grant him.

The kiss consumed them then. No thoughts entered their heads. All they had were feelings, physical and emotional. The feel of the other lips on these, the duel of their tongues as the mapped out each other's mouths and learnt what caused the other the greatest pleasure. The feel of hands pressing into skin felt through their clothes as they held tightly to each other, the only real thing in the world which was swirling around them.

But soon Callen found the current position was not the most comfortable, therefore gently not interrupting the kiss he moved, turning Marty so he was lying on his back, Callen at his side rest on his elbow as he threaded one hand through the younger man's hair and the other rested on Marty's hip.

Deeks didn't notice the change in position until their lips finally parted and he blinked open his eyes to find Callen above him, smiling at him with such soft caring emotion shining in his eyes.

"Hey." He whispered returning the smile while he found that his voice really didn't want to speak any louder. That was so much more than he had imagined it would be, but it was everything he hadn't known he'd wanted his first kiss with G to be. It had been beyond perfect in his mind.

"Hey." Callen replied. He knew he probably shouldn't have taken the kiss as far as he had, but he couldn't not. Not when Marty was finally in his arms. And well, Marty didn't seem to mind, so he really couldn't find it in himself to care. Instead he allowed himself the time to just enjoy the moment. To remember the bliss he felt with Marty in his arms and lips under his own. To revel in the mind-blowing glory he'd experienced.

They stared at each for a moment longer, before Deeks wrapped one hand around Callen's neck, pulling him back down for another kiss. He couldn't get enough of the other man's lips now he'd experienced them. It was then he found the extra joy at the new position in the fact he could now run his hand across G's chest, mapping the contours of his muscles as his tongue mapped out his mouth. Oh yes, this was perfect.

And Callen agreed wholeheartedly as he settled over the younger man, sharing pleasure and passion though lips and hands. Oh yes, this was definitely what he wanted for as long as he could have it.


	22. Chapter 22

**Hello my lovelies. I would like to thank** **Sassylassy1313, heyjode, Dief09, amywegner16, JackSam, tiggerkitty348, Guest, Beepmybanana and Guest** **for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS: LA.**

* * *

When Callen and Deeks finally parted lips the sun had set and they were surrounded by the shadowy darkness of a night lit only by the moon. They could no longer read every emotion that crossed the other man's eyes in the silvery light. That gave Deeks the courage to address the question that was foremost in his mind now he and G had crossed the boundary line they had been walking since he left NCIS and LA.

"G, what's going to happen now?" He asked gently smiling up at the man lying above him.

At those words Callen pulled himself into a sitting position and turned to stare out at the water. Watching the way the occasional wave crest would sparkle as it caught the moon light. In doing so he finally answered Marty's question. "I don't know."

"I want to be with you, G." Deeks replied as he too sat, though he was slightly behind Callen and staring at him rather than the ocean, wanting to be able read any tells he gave in his body language as they had this conversation.

"It's not that easy." Callen responded before turning to meet Deeks' eyes. "I live hundreds of miles away, Marty. Not to mention I don't really get structured time off. I just… I don't know how we could make it work."

Deeks sighed at those words. He knew they were true, but he didn't want this to be it. He wanted to be with G. Wanted to see where this thing between them could go, wanted to see if they could have a future. As such he said words he never thought he would say. If it was the only way, well then.

"I could always come to you, on my days off." He suggested, but even he could hear the slight quiver in his voice at the idea of returning to LA.

It was a quiver Callen didn't miss either. Therefore he turned so he was facing Deeks and could grab his arm, hoping it would show how honestly he felt the words he spoke. "I don't want you returning to LA until you're ready."

"So you're saying that it won't work?" Deeks replied in a tone filled with sadness. So this was it. One perfect night and what could have been between him and G would end before it could truly begin.

"No. I'm saying it's going to be hard. But I want to try, if you do." Callen responded moving his hand down Deeks' arm so it was resting on top of the younger man's hand. He knew with his head that this wasn't a good idea, but looking at Marty, hearing the sadness in his tone, well it wasn't his head that was in control right then. No it was his heart.

"I do, I really do." Deeks replied with hope as he smiled at the man sitting across from him. And as he said the words he turned his hand so he could link his and Callen's fingers together, as if by that action they were confirming that they were going to try this. I mean partners of military personnel spent months apart from the one they loved, knowing they were in danger. If they could do that, then surely they could do this, right?

"Okay then." Callen responded squeezing Deeks hand tightly in his own. He didn't know what would happen next, but he was glad that they had agreed to try. Glad to know that there would be more than just this night. With that thought his mind went to his next days off and he couldn't help but curse himself for the plans he had already made. But at least once those plans had been completed Marty would feel comfortable in his home. Therefore with a quirk of a smile on his lips he said in a light heart tone, "I won't be coming up this week again, I have to move this guy who disappeared's stuff into my house on my day off."

"Well at least you'll have furniture when I do come visit." Deeks responded with a cheeky smile of his own. He had forgotten about the things he'd left in LA. Forgotten about what G had arranged for them. It was as if they belonged to someone else, someone who wasn't him. But then, perhaps they did. They belonged to a Deeks that no longer existed after all.

"Yep. And kitchen equipment. I could cook you dinner." Callen replied his smile deepening with affection as he envisioned doing just that. He would like that. Having Marty in his house, cooking him a romantic dinner just like all other couples. Yes he would like that a lot.

"I'd like that." Deeks responded sincerely. It gave him something to aim for. A goal to make sure he kept pushing himself to not just live in the bubble he had created at the bar. He needed to go out, interact with others, learn to move through society once more, so he could go to G's and his boyfriend could cook him dinner. Yes, that was a goal worth pushing through the anxiety and pain for.

"Me too." Callen replied with a smile. He knew it wouldn't happen instantly, but he hoped there would come a time when Marty was ready to return to LA, even if it was just to his house to see him. He hoped he would be able to do that, someday.

Of course it was then that something came into his mind that put a dampener onto those thoughts, but he knew he had to say it. After all Deeks had left everything in his previous life behind, he deserved the chance to leave Callen behind to, without any worry or guilt of the pain it would cause him. He needed Marty to know he was free, even if he knew he himself was not. Because there was no way he could cause Marty any more pain. Therefore taking a deep breath he said, "Listen, I want you to promise me something."

"What?" Deeks asked with a frown at the seriousness Callen had in his voice. Just what was it he wanted him to promise?

"That if you meet someone here, someone you like and who likes you back, you don't dismiss them just because of me. I want you to have a life away from LA, away from NCIS… I want you to be happy." Callen replied clearly, trying to make sure no emotion entered his tone as he said the words.

Deeks' first thought to that was to say no way. But he stopped himself from saying it, and instead tried to think about why G would be asking him to do such a thing. The obvious reason was that G wanted to be free in LA to do as he pleased, but Deeks didn't think that was it. Instead he didn't try to read between the lines and instead took the words a face value, and in doing so saw what it was G was trying to do. Saw how he offering him his freedom to do as he choose, even if Deeks knew he'd already made his choice. As such there wasn't likely to be anyone who would catch his interest while G wasn't there. Therefore he found it rather easy to respond.

"Okay. I'll promise you that. On the condition you promise not to have sex with anyone but me in my bed." Well he might as well get something out of it as well, right?

"I can definitely do that." Callen replied. After all he had no plans on sleeping with anyone but Marty, so that would be rather easy.

"Or on any my furniture." Deeks corrected wanting to make sure G didn't try to find any loop-holes in his words. He was a former lawyer after all. And hey he had already found the loop-hole in the promise he'd made to G.

"Don't worry your furniture will be safe. I promise." Callen responded with a light chuckle. Only Marty would make that correction.

"Okay, then I promise to keep my eyes open for hot chicks, and dudes." Deeks replied before leaning in and sealing the promises they had made with a deep kiss, wanting to make sure that when both of them remembered the promises they made it was interlinked with the toe-curly kiss, something that he was sure would stop anything in its tracks. Or at least, that was the plan.

Finally they pulled apart and Deeks let out a sigh. It was getting late and they still needed to make their way back to the bar. He didn't want to worry Frank or Henry if they were gone too long. Therefore with regret he said, "We should probably go back before Frank sends out a search party for us."

"I think it's more likely that Henry is expecting us to be getting up to no good together after eating his romantic meal. He won't want to think it was wasted." Callen replied with a smirk as he moved stealthily closer to the younger man, aiming to continue the kissing they had been doing earlier.

"I can actually hear him saying that." Deeks responded with a shake of his head. That sounded so like Henry, maybe it wasn't such a good thing he and G had been spending so much time together in the kitchen. It seemed the chef was rubbing off on the other man.

"Yeah, that's because he actually did earlier." Callen replied making Deeks laugh out loud. Well at least Callen wasn't turning into Henry. That had to be a good thing, right? He was just about to say something along those lines, but his words were stopped by Callen's lips locking onto his, and he once more found himself being lowered backwards so he was lying down, with Callen at his side. Well he certainly wasn't going to complain about that. Hell no. Instead he lay there happily falling back into sharing kisses with G and enjoying exploring his chest with his hands. Definitely much more fun than returning, and well they might as well spend the rest of their time together wisely.

* * *

By the time they finally returned to the bar Henry and Frank were just making their way up to bed. Therefore they only had to put up with knowing smiles from the older couple and a lot of eyebrow waggling from Henry as they said goodnight.

* * *

They went up to Deeks room and changed for bed, without a thought to how their new status could change things. But as Deeks came out of the shower room he was suddenly aware of it, and he wasn't sure what to do now. I mean sure they had been sharing a bed every time Callen came here, but this was the first time they would be sharing one after agreeing to be in a relationship together. So he really didn't know what to do now. As such he stood there procrastinating as he tried to work it out in his mind.

"Get into bed, Marty." Callen said with a roll his eyes as he set action to his words and grabbed the younger man's hands and pulled him towards him. Then once Deeks was comfortably in bed beside him, Callen leaned over and turned off the light, before he pulled Marty once more into his arms and carried on where they had left off on the cliff. Namely kissing, though he did make sure it didn't go any further than just kissing. He knew Deeks wasn't ready for that, and in truth neither was he. This wasn't a one night thing, this was a future they had decided on together, and as such there was no way he was going to jump into bed with the guy at the end of the first night, figuratively at any rate. They had time for that, they had all the time in the world for their relationship to develop at whatever pace they wanted.

And at the feel of the restrained kisses Deeks relaxed into Callen's arms. He knew he could trust G not to take things any further, and he always felt so safe in his arms. He certainly wasn't going to say no to more kissing, to continuing the beginning of their future together.

They continued sharing kisses until sleep claimed them both and they fell into its welcoming slumber with Callen carefully wrapped around the younger man, offering what protection he could from his dreams with his arms and physical presence.


	23. Chapter 23

**Hello my lovelies. I would like to thank** **heyjode** **,** **Lynmurph3 (Guest), amywegner16,** **Dief09** **and** **Beepmybanana** **for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So firstly sorry for the long wait. I am trying to move house and don't seem to have much time for anything right now. Anyway enough with my excuses, here is the next chapter, I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't NCIS: LA.**

* * *

The next day passed in an amalgamation of kisses and work for the newly defined couple, interspersed with teasing comments from Frank and Henry. Throughout it they lived in a wonderful bubble of blossoming feelings created by a new relationship, and the usual banter than defined their friendship. It wasn't until that night when they were ready for bed that it truly hit that tomorrow Callen would be returning to LA.

"G." Deeks said, sitting carefully on the edge of the bed. He wasn't sure how to say what he wanted. Wasn't even truly sure if it actually was what he wanted, but he knew he had to say it.

"Marty? What is it?" Callen asked moving towards him so he could rest a hand on his arm, hoping the connection would help the younger man express whatever was on his mind.

"I was thinking, that maybe tonight we should have sex." Deeks replied finally getting the words out.

"No." Callen responded instantly. They were not ready for that. In fact they were nowhere near ready for that.

"But you're going back to LA tomorrow, and we don't know when we'll see each other next…" Deeks replied trailing off at the end as if those reasons explained enough of his thinking.

"Marty, we'll have sex when we're ready and for no other reason. I'm coming back, I'm not going to leave you." Callen responded with. He needed Marty to know that sex really wasn't that important, not to them, not then.

"Okay." Deeks sighed in relief and a smile spread across his face as he leaned towards the older man, sealing their lips together in a gentle sweet kiss that said more than words ever could right then.

When they finally pulled apart Callen dragged Deeks into the bed beside him, before wrapping him once more in his arms. He loved falling asleep wrapped around Marty. He wasn't sure how well he would be able to sleep once he returned to his bedroll. But that wasn't the thoughts he needed to think then. No all he needed to think about now was the man he was with. As such Callen found he could not stop himself from peppering kisses along Marty's neck, making the younger man chuckle until he turned in Callen's arms.

"Well we don't have to go to sleep right now. It's still early after all." Was all he said before kissing G on his lips, and sweeping them both away in the feel of being with the other. Sweeping all other thoughts from their minds, and instead made it so that they only concentrated on the here and now, and who it was they were sharing the bliss they were experiencing with.

In fact it wasn't until the next morning that the shadow of Callen's departure was truly felt among the men who lived at the bar. The breakfast they all shared was unusually subdued with the knowledge that rather than joining Henry in the kitchen Callen would be heading back to LA.

"Are you sure I can't persuade you to stay? Our barman is extremely attractive, and I have it on good authority that he likes you, surely that's an incentive to stay?" Henry asked into the quiet not being able to cope with the sombre mood a moment longer.

"While that is a very tempting offer, though I really don't think you should be pimping him out like that, I really can't." Callen replied with a small chuckle at how his words caused Deeks to almost choke on his food.

"Oh don't worry, we only pimp him out to his boyfriend. Plus good kitchen staff are really had to find." Henry responded with a wave of his hand making Deeks blush at how casually he just called him and G boyfriends. It wasn't a word they had used yet to describe their relationship, but he liked it. He liked it a lot.

"I'm not that good." Callen answered back as if he was revealing a secret he'd been keeping.

"When I'm done with you, you will be." Henry replied with a wink, though he did drop the subject then. But at least he had achieved one of his goals, and that was to lighten the atmosphere around them all with his humour.

* * *

Finally it was time for Callen to go. He'd packed up all his stuff in the car and he had his brown bag of lunch already sitting on the passenger sit. All that was left was to, well, actually leave. Which he was finding harder than he expected it to be.

"Call me when you get back. Let me know you made it okay." Deeks said when the two men were standing facing each other, but trying to put of the parting that they knew was coming fast.

"Yes, mom." Callen replied with a smirk before turning serious. "You call me if you need me, any time, right?"

"And what if I just want to talk to my boyfriend?" Deeks asked his cheeky grin on his face, though his words were asked in complete seriousness. He really wanted to be able to just call G whenever he felt like it, but he wanted to make sure the other man was okay with him doing that.

"Then that's an even better reason to call me." Callen replied before closing the distance between them and kissing Marty with all the passion he had inside him. He wanted him to remember this kiss, remember what it declared about them, and the promise it held for their future together.

Deeks returned the kiss with equal fervour, determined to get as much as he could from that last moment they had together for the foreseeable future. He didn't know when he would see G again, and as such wanted to make the most of the now.

But still they could not continue kissing forever, however much they may wish they could. As such it came to its inevitable end as they pulled apart, Callen stepping back from the younger man, though not breaking the eye contact they shared.

"Make sure you come back, G. Take care of yourself, and try not to do anything stupid, yeah?" Deeks said even if he knew that the other man couldn't make any promises, he still had to say it.

"No promises, but I'll try. After all Sam will kill me if I don't." Callen replied smiling softly at Marty. He knew he was getting the better deal here, I mean it was highly unlikely anything would happen to Marty working behind a bar. That could certainly not be said for his job.

"I'm completely with Sam on this one." Deeks responded with a smirk. At least he knew Sam would have G's back. He trusted the big guy to make sure he came back to him. Because that was what they did, it was what partners did.

At that Callen chuckled, but didn't say anything more. He really didn't want to be talking about Sam in his last moments with Marty. "I'll come up as soon as I can." He said sincerely instead, taking Marty's hands in his and giving them a squeeze.

"I'll see you then, then." Deeks replied before pulling G in for one last kiss. This one containing less passion than the last. It was more a promise of what was to come, the next time they met.

And with that final kiss Callen climbed into his car and drove away from the cove and the man he had such growing feelings for. Drove away from his boyfriend, who stood and watched until his car was out of sight.

* * *

The next morning Hetty stood at the entrance to the bullpen waiting to welcome her two senior agents back from their leave.

"Mr Callen, Mr Hanna. I hope your medical leave was restful." She said smiling at them both as they walked in side by side.

"It was, thank you, Hetty." Callen replied his smile widening beyond his power to stop it as he remembered all that had happened during his time away. As he remembered he now had a boyfriend waiting for him. And for the first time in his career he couldn't wait for his next days off so he could see Marty once more.

Hetty for her part saw the smile and couldn't stop her eyebrows raising. Just what was the meaning of that? It made her even more determined to find out just what it was that kept pulling her agent to a cove in the middle of nowhere, especially when it put that look on his face. See needed to find out just what was going on in Mr Callen's life. But she did not let any of that show on her face as spoke once more. "Kensi and Detective Thomas are working a case. Eric and Nell are waiting to brief you up in ops."

"Thanks, Hetty." Sam responded before dropping his bad and heading towards the stairs, his partner only one step behind.

Hetty waited until they had disappeared from sight before going to collect her bag and making her way out of the office. She had a bar to visit, and the mysteries of one G Callen to uncover.


	24. Chapter 24

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank heyjode, Dief09, amywegner16, Guest and Beepmybanana** **for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So I have been dying to write this chapter for ages. I had it all planned out in my head and everything. But as I was writing it, it became something completely different. So this is not the chapter I thought it was going to be, I think it is even better. I hope you like it.**

 **On a side note I have no idea how readily available scotch whiskey is in America compared to the UK. I imagine here it is more so, as it comes from Scotland. Apologises if this assumption is wrong.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't NCIS: LA.**

* * *

The late afternoon-early evening emptiness was in full swing as Deeks stood alone behind the bar. Usually this was the time he hated the most about the afternoon shift. There was never enough to keep him completely occupied, after all there were only so many things he could clean behind the bar. But that afternoon he gloried in the time to do nothing but get lost in his own head. Because for the first time in so long he had something amazing to daydream about, namely his boyfriend. The same boyfriend he'd spent an hour on the phone to the previous evening after he had finished work, which meant it was close to midnight before he'd been able to call G, not that the older man seemed to mind at all. Then there was the text he'd come back from surfing to find on his phone that morning. It didn't say anything of importance in words, but the idea that G texted him in the morning, that meant more than Deeks ever thought it could.

He was in fact so far in his mind, so relaxed in his surroundings and himself, he allowed himself to fall so far into not paying attention to his surroundings that he didn't even notice the very recognisable Jaguar that pulled into the parking lot, or the little lady that climbed out of it. In fact it wasn't until someone cleared their throat that he realised he wasn't alone at all. It was a throat clear he knew he would be able to recognise anywhere. It caused him to freeze as his eyes travelled to the door and he saw who was silhouetted against the outdoor sun. Caused his mind to screak to a halt and his eyes to widen as fear coursed through him at the sight of her. Just what the hell was she doing here? How had she found him? Why? Why now?

* * *

Hetty had enjoyed a pleasant drive down the coast letting the throttle go as she raced down the winding roads. She did not see the point in not appreciating the journey, even if she had her destination firmly in her sights. She had already arranged a room in the local town, under one of her aliases of course, so there was no reason to try and complete her self-imposed mission in one day. Which was good, because she did not think finding the reason Callen kept coming out to this bar would be easy.

Pulling into the parking lot of the bar she took a good look around her, studying the lay of the cove and the other vehicles in it. One caused her eyebrows to raise but she shook of the coincidence of the similarly of that vehicle to the one Mr Deeks had driven off in. She did not believe for a moment she would find her wayward detective in a place such as this. He would go crazy within a couple of days in such a quiet backwater, she was sure. Therefore putting it out of her mind she approached the bar, noting all the windows and exits as she did so. Always best to be prepared when entering unknown territory after all.

Walking through the door she found herself stopped short at the sight of the barman. It seemed she was wrong. She was indeed going to find her wayward detective in this bar, how… intriguing. And not just because of his new locale, but also because Callen had obviously been coming to visit him here, regularly. Oh yes, this trip had just got a whole lot more interesting in Hetty's mind. Therefore she cleared her throat, wanting to let Mr Deeks know she was there. She watched as he froze and his eyes snapped to her. She saw them widen, and she saw the fear flash through them before the shutters of the mask she knew slammed down.

"Well this certainly answers a few questions, though it does seem to raise some more." She said with a small smile of the young man. She was so glad to see him. So glad that he seemed to being doing okay. And also so glad that Callen had obviously not given up on his team mate. Oh yes, her boy had grown so much from the lone wolf she had once known.

At her words Deeks found himself having to fight a flight response. The sound of her voice, it brought back everything he'd run from. Brought back the memories of LA in such clarity he expected the rest of the team to show up as well. Could almost hear the sarcastic comment Sam would let slip through his lips at him working in a bar, could almost hear Kensi's laugh as she joined in on making him the butt of their jokes, could almost see the smirk on Callen's lips as he egged both of them on - no not Callen. He wouldn't do that. Not now, not after everything that had happened, had changed between them. Callen was his boyfriend, his friend, everything was different. He wasn't in LA, this wasn't the bullpen of NCIS, he was no longer Hetty's to control. Forcing that sentence to the forefront of his mind he took a deep breath before trying to act relaxed, even if he felt anything but.

"Hetty, what can I get you today? I don't think we have a decent single malt, but I could check the cellar." He replied, trying to keep his voice light as if he was talking to any other customer, but he knew he had failed when Monty's head shot up from where he was laying by the bar. It seemed he hadn't been able to keep the waiver from his tone then, damn.

"Please do not go to any trouble, Mr Deeks. I'm sure there you have a perfectly acceptable scotch behind there somewhere." Hetty responded moving into the bar watching Deeks carefully while making it look as if she was taking a look around the place. It was as she studied him getting her drink that she realised she had been wrong yet again. The mask on his face was not the one she was accustomed to him wearing. There were subtle differences, and it had a stiffness about it that even at his lowest he had not had before. It was like he was wearing clothes that he was not comfortable in, rather than those he had worn all his life. There was only one conclusion she could draw from that, and it was that Deeks had changed. How, why, she didn't know. But she was going to find out.

* * *

Deeks found his hands shaking as he carefully lifted down the only bottle of scotch they had. In fact they got so bad he had to clench them a couple of times before even considering pouring her a measure of the drink. Finally it was done and he turned to place it on the bar in front of her, only to find she had settled on the bar stool right in front of him.

"Here. I just need to go and… change a barrel." He gulped out. He couldn't do this. Couldn't be this close to her. He needed to get away, and he needed it now. With that, and without waiting for Hetty to reply he fled through the door at the back of the bar his breathing accelerating to the point of almost hyperventilating.

He lent against the wall as soon as the door closed behind him wondering what to do now. Neither Frank nor Henry were there, they'd gone into town. And while he knew they would be back soon, he also knew he couldn't hide back here until they returned. How was he going to get through this? He was starting to find it hard to breathe as he felt a suffocation starting to crush him. It was then, just as he felt like he might pass out that the answer suddenly flashed into his mind. And while if he'd been in his right mind he'd have realised it wasn't exactly logical, right then that did not compute. Instead he pulled his phone from his pocket and fumbling found the number of the only man he could think he that could make this better. Hitting call he raised the phone to his ear and prayed that he answered. Prayed that when he really needed him, Callen would be there.

* * *

Callen was just pulling up outside his house. They had finished off the case Kensi and the detective had had, and as Hetty wasn't around they'd all decided to slope off early. He knew Deeks was working the afternoon shift that day, and as such was counting down the minutes until he would be off so he could call him. He knew he was being sappy, just as he knew if Sam had any idea of what he was thinking he would never live it down. But he really couldn't find it in himself to care. He'd agreed to a relationship with Marty, and well, he wasn't going to do that in half measures. Marty deserved more than that, and Callen was determined to give it to him. Determined that while he couldn't be with him as often as either of them would like, he would do whatever he could to make it up to his boyfriend. And if that meant spending hours on the phone to each other every night, well so be it. It seemed a perfectly rational and sensible solution in his mind.

Checking the clock before he turned off the engine Callen realised he had time for a quick shower before the phone call. So with that in mind he climbed out of car, pulling his ringing phone from his pocket as he did so. He wasn't really thinking about who was on the other end, no doubt it was Sam asking him round for dinner or something and as such he was already planning on how to say no.

He answered the call with his usual "Callen," and then waited for the caller to speak. When they didn't he was confused, that confusion went to alarm when he noticed the heavy breathing coming down the line. "Who is this?" He snapped a frown forming on his face as he planned how to deal with… whatever this was.

"G?" Came the gasping sound down the line. And while it wasn't much, it was enough that he knew exactly who was on the other end of the phone.

"Marty? What's wrong? Breathe. Just breathe." He replied trying to keep his voice calm as he turned and climbed back into his car. He didn't care what it would cost him, if Marty needed him he was going, there was no question of that in his mind.

Deeks closed his eyes and found some of the tension leech from him at the sound of the other man's voice. He was so thankful he answered, and hearing him he automatically responded to words, and started to breathe. Finally when he felt calm enough to speak he answered Callen's question. "Hetty… she here, G."

"What?" Callen asked in shock. Why was she there? How had she found him? What had she done to the man he cared for to make his panic as he obviously was? Oh no. He was not going to let her get away with that. No one hurt his Marty, he didn't care who they were. With that in mind he flipped his phone onto speaker and started his car once more. He had a long journey ahead of him, and a lioness to fight when he got there. But there was no question in his mind that he was going to Marty's side.

Hearing Callen's shock strangely soothed Deeks. It was almost as if he'd subconsciously worried that G had been the one to tell her where to find him. But he knew he wouldn't do that, his tone of voice proved it. Therefore in a calmer, more put together tone of voice Deeks answered the unasked questions he knew G had, his detective mind clicking in automatically as he did so, remembering things he barely registered at the time. "I don't know, G. she just appeared. Though she seemed surprised to see me."

"What did she say?" Callen asked cursing to himself as he found himself pulling into LA traffic. Damn he hated it even more then than normal.

"Something about answering questions, and having more. G, I don't want to talk to her. I can't. I'm not ready." Deeks replied desperation seeping into his voice as if he hoped his boyfriend could come up with a solution, even if he was hundreds of miles away.

"Okay. Where are Frank and Henry?" Callen asked, already figuring out they were not there. If they had been he was pretty sure he would be having this conversation with one of them while the other comforted their son. You know that is if they hadn't tried to kill Hetty first for hurting him. Hmm, now that could be something interesting to see. Frank and Henry versus Hetty, he wasn't entirely sure who would win that fight.

"In town. They should be back soon." Deeks answered his palms starting to sweat as he once more realised he was alone with Hetty.

Callen quickly evaluated different ideas and plans when he heard those words before coming up with something he hoped would work, and it was the best he could do for Marty right then. "Right, this is what you are going to do. Hang up the phone and call Frank. Then you stay in the kitchen until they return. Got it?" He asked simply.

"But the bar-" Deeks responded but before he could say anything else Callen interrupted him.

"Will be fine for the 15 minutes it'll take them to get to you. Trust me." He said in a soothing tone, hoping that Marty would do as he asked. He really didn't want him anywhere near Hetty right then. I mean he had only just faced everything he'd been through, was only just starting to get better, he did not need her on top of all that.

Deeks shallowed at that. A large part of him felt really bad at the idea of following Callen's order. He didn't want to leave the bar unattended, Frank and Henry trusted him and if he hid in the kitchen he was breaking that trust. But a larger part, the one that refused to let him breathe when he was in same room as Hetty knew he couldn't go back out there. He just hoped the others understood.

"Okay. Thanks." He finally replied. At least he knew that if Frank or Henry were angry, G would back him on this. He knew G would be there for him, and that removed some of the worry from his mind.

"No need to thank me, Marty. Just take care of yourself. Leave the rest to me." Callen responded his voice darkening as he said the final words. Because Deeks wasn't only one who would be making another call when they hung up. He had one of his own to make, and it was not going to be pleasant, for him or the recipient.

* * *

Hetty finished her drink and checked the time on her watch. Mr Deeks had been gone a long time. Much longer than it took to change a barrel, that she was sure. Therefore she carefully climbed off her stool with the intention of going to find the man and make sure he was alright. She did not think Callen would be impressed if she was the cause of any harm coming to the former detective. But as she approached the door marked staff only she was stopped by Monty. He stood in front of the door his hackles raised as he growled at her. She was shocked she had to admit. She never thought the dog had such a protective streak inside him, but she also knew there was no way he was letting her pass. She was just wondering if there was another way to the back of the bar when her mobile rang.

"Henrietta Lange." She said answering the call while not removing her eyes from Monty. She did not want him to attack because her attention was elsewhere.

"You need to leave that bar right now, Hetty." Said the voice down the line. She was startled by who it was, just how many times could she be surprised that day? Though considering she knew Callen was coming here often, she really should have expected this call. And she had, just not this soon.

"Mr Callen, what a pleasant surprise." She responded taking a step back from Monty as she spoke, though still trying to stare him down.

"Trust me, it's not. Leave. Now." Callen growled back. He wasn't playing around here, and when he got there they were going to having some very serious words. But for now his only concern was getting her as far away from his Marty as possible.

Hetty debated for a moment, but knew better than to try and be stubborn about this, not if she wanted answers. And she really did. Therefore moving well away from Monty she collected her things.

"I am leaving now. I have a room booked at the Sunset Hotel under the name Matilda Hunt, I will see you at breakfast tomorrow morning." She answered before hanging up the phone and making her way outside. Because she did not think of a minute that Callen was not on his way here. She did not know the nature of Mr Deeks and Callen's relationship, but it didn't take a genius to realise the younger man had called him. She had heard the protectiveness in his voice, which told her that her presence there had upset Mr Deeks. And she knew her boy, he would already be on his way. Yes she could wait for him to arrive tomorrow before getting answers. And she would get them, she would make sure of it. Callen would not be getting out of this conversation, even if she had to tie him down to have it.


	25. Chapter 25

**Hello my darlings. I would like to thank** **Malecwolf, Dief09, heyjode, Beepmybanana, Guest, amywegner16, Beststoriesever and PirateGinge** **for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS: LA.**

* * *

Frank and Henry were at the local market, bickering as they usually did over what to buy. Though their debates had changed from what they wanted to what they both thought Deeks would like best. They were just considering the merits of chicken over steak when Frank's phone rang. Pulling it from his pocket he frowned when he saw who was calling.

"Deeks, what's up?" He asked turning away from Henry to look towards the bar, as if he could see it from where he was, which he really couldn't.

"You need to come back. Now. Please." Deeks replied not being able to say anything else, he was still breathless even if his conversation with Callen had helped. He was still worried and scared and alone, and he didn't want to be, not any of it. Plus this is what G told him to do, so he was doing it. He trusted G with his life, always had, he had no reason to question his orders now.

Frank frowned when he heard not just Deeks' words but also his tone of voice. There was no question about what they would do. "We're on our way." He replied turning to Henry to tell him they were leaving only to find his husband already handing their half-filled basket to a member of staff with an apology on his lips siting a family emergency. Good. With that he turned back to Deeks to try and find out what situation they would be walking back into.

"Talk to me, Deeks. What's going on?" He asked as they rushed out of the doors towards their car which was luckily parked close by.

"Hetty's here." Deeks replied as if that explained everything. And to him it did. It was all he'd needed to tell Callen for him to understand, his mind forgot that it wouldn't have the same effect on the man he was talking to now.

"Who's Hetty?" Frank asked, but Frank found himself greeted by only silence that made him break into a run towards their car. "Marty, talk to me, kid." He said with a tone of urgency but not panic. He tried to use the voice he'd used when he was once a detective. He knew it was a tone Deeks would respond to, just as he himself always had.

"I can't. I just…" Deeks replied feeling his breathing accelerating again as he considered the situation he was in. But then he closed his eyes and pulled up the one image that would calm him. He thought of Callen. Taking an even breath he carried on talking, as if he was giving a sit-rep of a situation to his team. "I called Callen. He told me to stay in the kitchen. Please hurry. I don't want to be alone." His voice broke at the final sentence, not being able to keep up the facade any longer.

At those words Frank's worry increased tenfold. If this Hetty person was someone Callen was worried about Marty seeing, then it was bad. And that was all Frank needed to pass the phone to Henry as they jumped in the car and slam his foot down. He didn't care if he broke every speed limit in the state, he was getting to his son as soon as was humanly possible. Because he needed him and that was all that mattered to Frank right then.

Henry on the other hand grabbed the phone and started talking to the man on the other end. He didn't know what was going on, but he didn't ask. Instead he used his most calming voice telling Deeks where they were, and giving him an estimated time of arrival, one he had to revise when he noticed how Frank was driving, not that he questioned it. If it had been him at the wheel he would be doing the same. So it was probably good the one with the advanced driving qualifications was doing the driving right then.

They got back to the bar in a record time of 12 minutes. They both jumped out of the car and Frank scanned the area, but he could see nothing unusual there. But that did not mean there wasn't danger inside. As such he directed Henry to go round the back and go to Deeks in the kitchen, while he himself took the front. If anyone was in his bar that shouldn't be, that had upset his son, well they were going to have face him. And he was not in a good mood.

* * *

Henry entered through the back door and went straight into the kitchen and Deeks. When he saw him he felt his heart go out to the kid. He was as white as a sheet and was holding onto the serving area as if his life depended upon it.

"Deeks, Marty. It's okay, we're here now." He said softly as he approached the young man carefully. He was like a wounded animal and he would prefer not to get bitten while he was trying to help him. He reminded him of how Frank had been back in the early days after the other cops had found out he was gay. He'd hated that look on his husband then, and he hated seeing it on his son now.

"Henry?" Deeks whispered as relief flooded through him. He had been waiting for Hetty to barge in and demand to know what was going on. But it hadn't happened. No instead Henry was here, and where Henry was so was Frank. Thank god. With that thought he practically collapsed into the older man's open arms, not being able to stop the tears of relief that poured from his eyes at knowing it was over, that he was safe once more. At knowing he was no longer alone.

"It's alright, son. I've got you. Nothing's going to hurt you now." Henry murmured as he held Deeks tightly, running one of hands soothingly through his hair. He was never leaving the kid alone again, it was as simple as that. He never ever wanted to see Deeks like this. He didn't care why or who had caused this, well he did because he was going to kill them, but right then all he cared about was looking after the boy who'd found a place in his and his husbands heart.

* * *

Frank enter the bar cautiously, but he found it empty expect for Monty standing guard by the door to the back areas of the bar. There was also a whiskey glass on the bar top and a couple of notes at its side. He didn't touch either, they were not his concern. No the only thing that was, was that whoever this Hetty person was, she was gone now. His son was safe. Therefore walking towards the door to the back of house he signalled Monty that it was safe, before ruffling his head. "Good boy." He muttered. Because he knew Monty had stopped Hetty from going after Deeks. That was the only reason the dog would still be on guard and not with his master, he knew that.

Making his way quickly into the kitchen he was greeted by the sight of their son in his husband's arms as he cried. It broke his heart to see Deeks so destressed, and if he hadn't known the kid had already called Callen he would be on the phone to right now. But as it was, he was pretty sure that the agent would be turning up at some point that night. He didn't think for a moment Callen wouldn't want to be with Deeks, want to make sure he was okay. Even if their relationship hadn't evolved in the last few days he knew the other man would come.

"Deeks. Hetty's gone." He said making his way over to the other two men.

At those words Deeks head shot up and he looked at Frank with disbelief in his eyes. "You sure?" He asked hope starting to enter his voice at the idea it was really over. That he didn't need to face his past, didn't need to face her.

"There's no one here, no cars in the lot." Frank confirmed.

"Why?" Deeks asked a frown coming on to his face as he pulled away from Henry, able to now stand alone. He was glad Hetty had gone, but it didn't make any sense… unless "Callen." He whispered making both the other men frown at him.

"What about him?" Frank asked wondering what Callen had to do with the mysterious Hetty leaving.

"It had to be. He had to have called her." Deeks continued awe entering his voice now at the idea that whatever his boyfriend had said had caused his boss to leave. He knew, just as everyone at NCIS did that Callen and Hetty were close, but he never thought he'd be able to somehow get her to leave him alone. His boyfriend never cessed to amaze him lately.

"That doesn't matter now, she is gone. Why don't we go upstairs and you can relax, maybe call Callen again, yeah?" Henry said. The only thing that mattered to him was looking after Deeks right then, the rest could wait.

"But the bar-" Deeks started to say. I means his shift didn't finish for another 20 minutes and they couldn't leave it unmanned any longer.

"I'll deal with that. You go with Henry." Frank interrupted him. The kid needed someone with him, and he knew Henry would mother him in the way he needed right then. Not to mention he had his own phone call he wanted to make to a certain special agent. He needed to know who this Hetty was and how dangerous she was to his son. He needed to make sure Deeks was protected.

"Okay, yeah." Deeks nodded. He was feeling really drained from all the emotion he'd been put through seeing Hetty. He wasn't sure if it was because it had been so unexpected, or if he would have felt the same if he'd known she was coming. If fact he hadn't even anticipated he would react the way he had upon seeing her. Not to mention he was starting to feel embarrassed about his behaviour. I mean he'd collapsed into Henry's arms and cried on his shoulder after hiding in the kitchen. Really not a good look, that was for sure.

"Come on then." Henry replied guiding the young man out of the kitchen and collecting Monty who was waiting outside the door. With his two charges firming in tow he made his way up to his and Franks apartment, guiding the younger man to the couch in the living room before going about helping him return to his normal happy self.

* * *

Frank waited until they were out of hearing range before he called Callen, he couldn't help but smile when it was answered after the first ring. A smile that grew at the greeting Callen gave him.

"How's Deeks?" Callen asked. He had desperately wanted to call Deeks back once he'd spoken to Hetty, but he also wanted to keep the line free so that he could be contacted if it was needed.

"As well as can be expected. Henry is with him upstairs. Who's Hetty?" Frank replied cutting right to the point.

At that Callen sighed. He had expected that question, but he had hoped to be there before he got it. But it seemed that wasn't going to be the case, and well he knew he could trust Frank. Knew he would protect Marty from everyone, including the woman who was the closest thing he had to a mother. And to do that, Frank needed to know. "She's the operations manager of our branch of NCIS." He answered even if he knew that barely scratched the surface of who Hetty truly was. But it was all he could say right then. I mean he didn't think there were really any words that could describe the woman properly, and surely that was enough for Frank to understand something of the woman they were up against.

"Why she here?" Frank asked with a frown wondering what the operation manager of the unit of NCIS Deeks used to work for was in his bar.

"I have no idea, but I promise I will find out. I'm meeting her tomorrow at her hotel." Callen replied with a determined voice. Oh yes, that was one of the many questions he would be asking her when they met.

"Oh? And what hotel would that be?" Frank asked in a deceptively causal tone, though he didn't fool Callen for a second. For a moment the other man debated whether to answer that or not, but in the end he decided this wasn't about him or keeping secrets, this was about Marty's protection, and the man who'd become his father deserved to know.

"The Sunset. She booked in under Matilda Hunt." He replied simply.

"I'll see you when you get here later, then." Frank responded not commenting on the information he'd just been told.

"Yeah see you then." Callen agreed before he hung up. He felt better now knowing Frank and Henry were there for Marty. He just wished he was there with him too, but he would be soon. Yes that was all he needed to think, he would see him soon. And with that thought on his mind Callen pushed his car through the LA traffic determined to reach Marty in the quickest time possible.


	26. Chapter 26

**Hello my darlings. I would like thank** **anonkp,** **heyjode, Guest, Guest, Beepmybanana, Guest and Max and Fern 4ever** **for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So I know this chapter is short, but the reason or that is that the next one will be pretty long (I think, I haven't actually written it yet but what I have planned in involved). Anyway I hope you enjoy this update and now I have finally moved house and am on holiday I hope to have the next update to you before next Friday. Fingers crossed and real life willing. Anyway enough from me, enjoy this chapter.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS: LA.**

* * *

Hetty was sat in the bar of her hotel enjoying a nice glass of scotch. She was thinking about the surprises she had faced that day, seeing Mr Deeks for the first time since he left, and the call from Mr Callen warning her off. She wasn't sure what to make of that. She knew Callen was protective to those he thought of as family, she had been on the receiving end of the protection more than once. But the way he behaved towards her with regards to Mr Deeks… that was something else. Something she had never seen in him before, and it intrigued her. She wanted to know what it was about the former detective that provoked such emotions in her boy. Therefore as she sat there she tried to think of the right questions to ask to gain the answers she sort. And as she ran ideas through her mind she subconsciously watched the door, waiting for the moment that Mr Callen arrived. Because while she had told him to meet her in the morning, she did not think he would wait that long. No doubt he would stop off to see her before carrying on towards Mr Deeks. Therefore she noticed when someone entered the bar, though it was not the person she thought it would be.

* * *

Frank waited until the restaurant had closed before leaving the part-time bar staff to run the place for him. He'd thought about what he was going to do ever since his call to Callen. And while he knew the other man was on his way, and he knew he was meeting with this Hetty the next morning, he also now knew she was his boss. He doubted he could give her the roasting she truly deserved for the setback she had caused in his boy. Therefore he was determined to give her a piece of his mind, and to hell with the consequences. She had no connection to him, and he needed her to know that she was not welcome in his bar, that she was not welcome anywhere near his son.

It was with this in mind that he entered the Sunset hotel and was told that Mathilda Hunt was sitting in the bar. Walking through the door it didn't take him long to work out which was the woman he was looking for. She was sitting in the seat he knew Callen and Deeks would automatically choose, the one that showed all entrances and exits as well as all those in the bar. Though he did have to say that she was not what he expected. Or at least she wasn't until he was standing in front of her and he could see into her eyes, then he knew, she was more dangerous than even he'd thought. This woman was even more dangerous than Callen at his most protective. Oh yes, Hetty was not someone you messed with, but he just shrugged that thought away. Because she'd messed with his family first, and he never been one to shy away from protecting his own, no matter what the cost to himself.

"Hetty?" He asked gruffly. He may be 99.9% sure it was her, but he needed clarification before he gave her a piece of his mind.

"Detective Monroe. How can I help you?" Hetty asked smiling up at the man in front of her with a calculating look in her eye as she slipped her drink. She didn't know for sure, but she could take an educated guess about why he was there. As such she studied the man who it seemed had come all this way to protect Mr Deeks from her. If nothing else she respected him for that. Any man who refused to cower at her knowing stare was definitely someone she worthy of her time.

"Its former detective, and stay away from my son." Growled out Frank deciding not to beat around the bush. She was the kind of person who could tie you in knots with words if you allowed her to. He wasn't going to give her that chance. No way in hell.

"Ah. How is Mr Deeks?" Hetty asked simply not even flitching at the supressed anger in his voice. She had seen and heard worse in her life after all.

"Fine, no thanks to you." Frank responded with, his eye narrowing at the almost flippant sound to the words she had spoken. How dare she take Marty's troubles so lightly? She was the reason he was like this. She had been his boss, and she was the one that had allowed him to be tortured. Oh yes, he really did not like this woman.

At his words Hetty put down her drink and turned to Frank with a serious look in her eyes as she spoke honestly. "I meant no harm. I was not aware he was here. If I had known I would not have arrived unannounced."

Frank heard the truth in her words and couldn't help but frown. If she had not come for Marty, what did she want with his bar? "Then why did you come, if not for him?" He asked leaning down to rest his hands on the back of the chair opposite her. He did not do the move to intimidate her, he didn't think he could even if he wanted to, no he did it to stop himself showing any emotion while continuing this conversation. To stop himself from reacting to whatever it was she was going to say in answer to his question.

At that Hetty sighed before answering once more with complete honesty, an honesty she rarely showed in connection to Callen. "I wanted to know what my son was doing spending so much time in you bar." She replied with a subtle emphasis on the word son so that the man across from her would know he was not the only one looking out for their family, for their child.

"Callen's you son?" Frank asked straightening in surprise at that. Surely that was something Callen would have told him when he asked who she was, rather than telling him she was his boss.

"As much as Mr Deeks is yours, yes." Hetty responded staring straight into Franks eyes.

And returning that look Frank suddenly realised he understood this woman. Understood why she'd come. It didn't mean he liked it or thought it was the right thing to do, but he did understand she did not mean any harm, though that did not excuse the fact that she had caused it. But he knew this wasn't his battle to fight. This was Callen's war. He'd said his piece, told her to stay away from Marty, the rest was up to Callen to deal with. Therefore he nodded before saying, "Okay. Have a nice evening."

"You too, Mr Monroe. And please tell Mr Deeks, I am sorry for any destress I have caused him." Hetty replied with a smile. She truly meant it. Had she known he was here she wouldn't have come… no that was a lie. Had she known he was here she would have come sooner. Something she knew Mr Callen was perfectly aware of. It was after all the reason he never told her.

Frank decided that that didn't even deserve a response. There was no way he would be mentioning this woman or this conversation to his son. Therefore without saying anything more he left the hotel and climbed back into his car. And as he sat there he realised that he had a lot more questions for Callen when he arrived than he had originally thought he would. With that in mind he turned his car back to the bar. He wanted to make sure he was ready and waiting for when G Callen turned up. It was time for them to have a talk, father to boyfriend.


	27. Chapter 27

**Hello my lovelies. I would like to thank** **amywegner16,** **Mimi french fan (Guest), Dief09, Beepmybanana and Guest** **for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So as promised another chapter this week, and as I reckoned it is a long one. I hope you like it.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS: LA.**

* * *

Callen pulled into the parking lot of the bar just after closing time cursing silently to himself. In truth he'd been cursing since he started this drive. Cursing the rush hour traffic he got caught up in heading out of LA, cursing the imbeciles who got in his way on the freeway, but most of all he was cursing the distance he had to travel to get to Marty's side. He didn't understand this feeling inside him. In all his other relationships he'd made sure to keep his partner at a distance, never letting them too close, never giving them a chance to hurt him, but it seemed Marty Deeks had bypassed every one of his self-preservation techniques. It was as if the walls he'd spent a lifetime building around his heart did not exist to the younger man. He had just somehow waltzed in and made himself at home.

Callen had no idea if this was because of who Marty was, or if it stemmed from their previous relationship of colleagues and friends. But he had decided he wanted to be with Marty, he'd made that choice so he really didn't care. He wondered if that should scare him, and he knew if it was anyone else then it would, if it had been anyone else that had broken down his defences so efficiently he would be running for the hills, but right then the only thing that truly caused him any worry and fear was for Marty himself. And the only thing on his mind was getting to the younger man's side, to make sure he was okay, to help him through whatever Hetty's arrival had caused. Yes the only thing he wanted right then was to be with the man he cared so deeply for, no matter how new their relationship.

Climbing out of his car he didn't hesitate to make his way to the front of the bar with that one destination firmly in his mind. To find Marty make sure he was okay. Though when he entered the bar he found his plans derailed somewhat by the man sitting in the empty bar, two bottles of beer in front of him.

"Callen, sit. We need to talk." Frank said calmly as he kicked out the chair opposite him for the younger man. He'd been thinking a lot about what he would say when G Callen arrived. Planning it all in his mind. because as much as he knew the guy was good for his son, that their relationship was something he needed to encourage to bloom, he also knew that he couldn't let what had happened today happen again. And he needed Callen to know that.

"Okay. How's Deeks?" Callen asked as he cautiously sat. He could see the look in Frank's eyes. It was one he'd seen before, that of a protective parent looking out for their child. And while he'd seen it, he never knew exactly how to behave around it. After all he'd never had anyone look at someone that way for him.

"He's okay. I talked to Hetty." Frank replied pushing the other bottle of beer towards the younger man as he spoke.

Callen nodded at that, taking the time to drink some of the beer while he considered what to say and all the possible outcomes of this conversation. Tried to think of a plan of action that would allow him to bypass the guard Frank was being.

"What did she say?" He finally asked evenly, a curious but casual expression on his face as he carefully put down his beer.

"It seemed she wasn't here for Deeks." Frank replied not taking his eyes off the man in front of him, wondering when he would realise what he meant by those words, or more accurately if he would show him when he worked it out.

"No?" Callen asked raising his eyebrow at that. He wasn't truly surprised if he was honest with himself. He'd made sure Hetty didn't know Marty was here, so it shouldn't shock him that she hadn't been there for him. But that did leave only one real explanation for her arrival, and it was one he'd been trying his hardest not to think about as he drove down here. Because he absolutely hated the idea that he was the cause of Marty's pain. That his visits to see him were the reason he'd been put in the position he had that day.

"No. She was here for you. Wanted to know why it was her son kept coming up here." Frank responded watching like a hawk as he said the word son. As such he didn't miss the slight sigh Callen let out between his teeth, nor the way his shoulders sagged at his words. If he was reading the kid right, he'd say that while those were the words he hadn't wanted to hear, they didn't exactly surprise him either.

Callen sat for a moment when he heard Frank's response. He heard the subtle emphasis he put on the word son and he knew the former detective was about to interrogate him for an explanation. He really didn't like telling people about his past, didn't like seeing the look in their eyes when they heard he'd never had a proper family. He really hoped he could find a way round telling it all to Frank, but he really didn't think the guy would be easily distracted, not when his reason for knowing was so he could protect Marty. No he doubted anything could distract Frank from protecting his son. Therefore Callen leaned back in his chair, beer in hand as he replied with a non-comital "Ah."

"Why didn't you tell me she was your mom?" Frank asked when he realised the other man wasn't going to say anything else. It seemed if he wanted answers he was going to have to ask the questions.

"It's complicated." Callen replied, shrugging his shoulders as he did, hoping that would be enough to get Frank to leave it be, not that he thought it would, but hey, he was trying to be optimistic.

"I not stupid, I'm sure I can understand. And I have the time to listen." Frank responded leaning back so he was matching Callen's posture. Using his ingrained interrogation techniques, even if he doubted they would have the desired effect on the federal agent in front of him. It was a natural habit to fall back on.

Callen knew he had no choice. He had to give Frank something. He could see in the older man's eyes that he needed to hear the explanation so he could find it in himself to trust him with Marty. Therefore he gave Frank the barebones of his history. No need to go into detail after all. "I was brought up in care. Until I was fifteen when I was sent to juvie. When I broke out the only thing that stopped me going to jail was Hetty. She took me in, cared for in a way no one ever had before, and she trained me to become the man I am today. She may be the closest thing I have to mother, but she is still first and foremost my boss."

"Do you truly believe that?" Frank asked with a frown. He had so many things he wanted to ask about what Callen had told him, but he could tell from his delivery that any more was not on the table. Therefore he concentrated on the one part that he didn't agree with, and that was that Hetty was first and foremost his boss. Because the woman he'd spoken to that at evening was most definitely not looking for a wayward member of staff, no she was trying to find out what her son was up to. And they were very different things.

"I'm not the first nor the last she took in and trained. There are many of us out there, Hetty's projects." Callen responded with, a slight bitterness entering his tone as he did so. He'd once thought he was special to her, maybe because she'd been his mom's handler, but he knew that wasn't true.

"Hmm. Tell me does she keep such a close eye on them as she seems to do with you?" Frank asked. He didn't think for a minute the answer was yes. Because while he was sure the lady he'd met had taken in many orphaned children over the years, had raised many of them to be formidable agents, he couldn't help but think the man in front of him still held a special place in her heart. He didn't know why, but he'd put money on the fact that she thought of Callen differently than she did the rest. Bet that she cared for him as something more than someone she took in and trained.

"Honestly, I have no idea." At that Callen sighed. He didn't want to be thinking about this right then. In fact he made a point never to think about these things. It was better left alone in his mind, therefore he decided it was time to change the conversation. "I'm sorry. I should have disabled the GPS in my car the last couple times I was here."

"We all make mistakes, Callen." Frank sighed. He knew he was closing the door of the previous conversation, and well he couldn't blame him. He had enough background info for now.

"Yeah, I know." Callen agreed darkly. There were many mistakes he'd made in his life, not turning off his GPS was just the last in that long list in his mind.

"Tell me, is there a chance any more of the people from Marty's previous life ae going to be turning up here?" Frank asked sitting up straight. This was the most important point in his mind. Because he didn't want anyone around Marty that he didn't want there. And that included the people he'd once called family back in LA. He needed to know what the chances were he had to keeping them away from his son.

"I'll make sure they don't." Callen promised though while he thought that he realised he would need to go out and disable the tracker on his car, and his phone. But he would make sure no one would bother Marty. He'd already 'talked' with the wonder twins to get them to stop following him when he wasn't at work, he would just have to make sure he had a plausible story to give Sam when he returned to work that would explain why he'd disappeared yet again. But even as he thought that a small smirk appeared on his face. He'd make Hetty help him with that one, it was all her fault he was here and not in LA after all.

"You'd better, kid. I like you, and Marty's likes you a hell of a lot more, but I will not let him be hurt like he was today. Am I understood?" Frank replied. He'd seen the smirk and the dark look cross Callen's eyes and he'd had to suppress a shudder. He really wouldn't want to be on the end of his wrath right then. But at least that look showed him just how far he was willing to go to protect the boy they both loved.

"Completely, sir." Callen responded, respect coming through in the words. I mean how could he not respect someone who confronted Hetty to protect one he cared for?

"Good. Now go see your boyfriend. He's in mine and Henry's apartment, no doubt being mothered and smothered by my husband." Frank replied with a nod. He'd got his message across and discovered what he needed from this talk, time to let the boy go to where he was truly needed, for both him and his son.

"I will." Callen said as he stood, ready to move out of the room but before he did he spoke once more. "I'm glad he found you, the both of you. He needed a family, and here he found one of the good ones."

* * *

Deeks sat on Frank and Henrys couch wrapping in a thick blanket with Monty at side. Henry had left him a while ago to work the kitchen for the night, and in truth he'd welcomed the time alone. It was strange, he'd thought he'd hate it. That he would be downstairs within half an hour of Henry leaving, but instead he found it gave him time to think in a place he knew it was safe to do so. Because he knew Frank and Henry were there if he needed them. So he sat there and thought over the feelings seeing Hetty had brought up inside him and he realised that it was less the woman herself, but more the memories she brought with her that had caused his panic. It was remembering all he'd left when he looked into her eyes, remembering the pain he'd thought he'd put behind him. Of course he hadn't. He had been overly optimistic if he'd truly believed he'd moved past all that had caused him to run from LA. He should have known, should have realised that the happy bubble he'd been living in here was going to burst sometime.

He wished he could get that bubble back, but he knew it was too late. Now he needed to figure out a real way past this, rather than convincing himself that all he needed to do was face up to what happened to make it all go away. Because it wasn't going to go away. It was always going to be there, lurking at the back of his mind ready to strike when he least expected it to. And he couldn't box it up, that solution had been well and truly burnt on the cliff when he'd cried in G's arms. He had faced it, faced what he'd been through, now he needed to work out how to deal with it.

He couldn't stop the humourless chuckle that came out of his lips in the empty room as he thought those words. Because while he felt he'd moved so far away from the Deeks he'd been when he ran from LA, he was right back where he'd been then. Trying to think of a way to deal with the pain and emotional upheaval being tortured had caused him. Not to mention the discourse in him about the people he'd thought of as family for the last four years. People it turned out that were no such thing.

Oh man, he really had no freaking clue how to deal with all this.

He was pulled from his thoughts by the door of the apartment opening. He turned towards the entrance to the livingroom, expecting it to be Henry or Frank, so he was surprised to see G standing there. But that surprise was soon washed away by an overwhelming flood of emotions hitting him.

"G." He croaked out, and before he could even think to try and get anything else out he found himself wrapped in the arms of his boyfriend. The arms which no matter what made him feel safe in a way nothing else could. Arms that made him realise he didn't need to be strong, because G would be strong enough for the both of them. With that knowledge he allowed the tears he hadn't even realised he'd been holding back fall.

"It's okay Marty. I'm here, I've got you. I'm here." Callen muttered soothingly as he gathered the younger man in his arms and pulled him against his chest as he sat by him on the couch. Pulled his arms tight around him while whispered meaningless words into his hair, with a scattering of kisses upon Marty's forehead. Nothing mattered more to him right then than Marty, he was his whole focus, every thought, touch and intention in his mind focused solely on the man in his arms. Because Marty needed it to be that way, and that was the only important thing right then.

Finally Marty pulled back to look up at the man holding him and smiled slightly at the caring he saw in his eyes. "Sorry, I don't even know why I am reacting like this." He said with a slightly forced chuckle as he went to dry the tear tracks on his cheeks.

"It's to be expected, Marty. No one goes through what you did without repercussions." Callen replied softly, running his thumb gently across his cheek while his fingers curled into the younger man's hair.

"Really, what about Sam?" Deeks huffed. He doubted very much that anything effected the former SEAL. Hell he'd been back a work long before Deeks could even think about idea of returning, yet they'd been through the same thing. Yeah he very much doubted Callen words would apply to him.

"He has his own demons, Deeks. Trust me." Callen responded sincerely. He knew his partner had had issues after that case, though his were less related to the torture and more to the danger Michelle had been in. But the reason behind them did not matter, the fact was they all had their crosses to bear from that one.

At that Deeks pulled out of Callen's hands, turning so he could rest his elbows on his knees and run his hands through his hair as he tried to find the words to explain what he was thinking, and what he was feeling, to the man at his side. "I just… I want to get past this. I want to stop feeling so… weak and helpless."

At that Callen grabbed Marty's face turning him so he could stare into his eyes as growled out, "you are not weak and helpless, Marty Deeks. You are one the strongest people I know. Don't ever forget that." He couldn't let the other man think he was weak and helpless, because it wasn't true on any level, and if nothing else Callen knew he had to convince Marty of that fact.

"Then why did I break down, just from seeing Hetty?" Deeks asked so quietly that Callen almost didn't hear the words, but when he did his heart broke at the tone of them. He sounded so lost. Callen wanted to be able to give Marty an answer, but the truth was he didn't have one.

"Don't think I'm really qualified to answer that, but I'm pretty sure Nate would say something like the mind works in mysterious ways." He replied instead, smiling as Deeks chuckled in response, just the way he hoped he would. If he couldn't give him an answer, then the least he could do was lighten his mind, right?

"Yeah, I can actually see him saying that." Deeks responded before breathing out long and loud and then relaxing back on the couch, snuggling himself into the arms of his boyfriend and allowing his mind to stop thinking for a moment. To stop whirling around his problems and instead just be. To just feel the comfort and safety he always felt when Callen was there. Giving himself a chance to find his stability once more, before he even tried to consider the whys of his reaction again.

The silence surrounded them both as the tension slowly ebbed away from their bodies. As they both took the time to allow their brains and bodies to meet in the knowledge that they were together and that that was all that mattered to them right then.

Finally Callen felt able to break the silence. Felt able to say the words he knew needed to say. "I'm sorry Hetty came here."

"It's not your fault, G." Deeks replied instantly. I mean he wasn't Hetty's keeper, he couldn't determine what she was going to do, so really G had nothing to apologise for in Deeks' mind.

"Actually it kinda is." Callen responded, winching as he words caused Deeks to tense.

"Why?" Deeks asked sitting upright frowning at the man with him. He couldn't help but wonder if maybe G had told Hetty where to find him. Or somehow knew she was coming and hadn't told anyone. He couldn't stop his brain from wondering if the man he cared for had betrayed him in such a way, even while his heart was telling him it wasn't true.

"She came to find out why I kept spending my time at the bar." Callen replied evenly. He could see the thoughts going through Marty's eyes, and while it hurt him to realise that the younger man didn't trust him, he knew he couldn't blame him for not doing so. Not after all that had happened between him and Kensi. He knew it was going to take a long before Marty would ever trust so easily again, if he ever did.

"What? How did she even know you were here?" Deeks asked frowning at those words. I mean sure he knew she kept track of them all when they were working, but the times G had been here he hadn't been. So why?

"Guess she wanted to make sure I wasn't off doing something crazy." Callen responded with a shrug. He could think of no other reason for her to track him. Especially after he found out the name of his father. No doubt she wanted to make sure he wasn't on his way to Russia to locate the man.

"That's not right, G." Deeks argued back still frowning at the idea that not only Hetty keeping track of Callen when he wasn't working, but also that she would come here to find out why it was he did. Why didn't she just ask him if she had to know, or better yet, respect his privacy?

"Well I did fake being sick that one time." Callen replied in defence of the woman.

"One time. Then you were on medical leave. Something you can take wherever you like. She doesn't have a say in what you do in your free time, G." Deeks replied indignant on behalf of his boyfriend.

"It's what she does, I guess. I'll talk to her about it tomorrow. But for now, let's just forget about Hetty, yeah?" Callen responded. He didn't want to be talking about this now, no now he just wanted to spend time with his boyfriend.

"Okay." Deeks agreed but he still did not like the idea of Hetty wanting to know everything Callen did. She had no right to know that, no matter how close the two were.

"Okay. Why don't we go to bed, yeah? I don't know about you, but I could do with some sleep." Callen said. After all he knew Frank and Henry would be coming up soon, and he really didn't want to get the death glare from the chef. The conversation he'd had with Frank was more than enough for him for one night.

"Sleep sounds good. Especially if it's in your arms." Deeks responded cheekily as he waggled his eyebrows at the man with him.

"There is nowhere I'd rather you be, than in my arms, Marty." Callen agreed, though rather than standing for them to leave he found himself pulling the younger man closer to him as he spoke those words.

"Good, cos that's exactly where I want to be too." Deeks replied just before their lips finally met and the shared their first proper kiss since Callen arrived. A kiss which didn't truly touch on what had brought him racing from LA to be there. No it was just a normal kiss between a normal couple who wished to show the other how much they cared. A kiss that showed the feelings that were still so new to the both of them, and expressed that which had only just started to bloom between the new couple.

* * *

Much later, when Marty was sound asleep, Callen made sure to sneak out to his car to disable the GPS tracker. Marty did not need any more unwelcome visitors to find him there because of him. As such he also sent a quick message to Sam saying Hetty had him a special assignment before he shut off his phone and took out the battery. After all as he'd already considered it was Hetty's fault he wouldn't be in work tomorrow, she could deal with his partner's displeasure at that fact. And with that thought and a true smile on his lips he fell asleep, holding Marty tight in his arms as he did so.


	28. Chapter 28

**Hello my darling. I would like to thank** **Dief09,** **Mimi a fan (Guest), heyjode, Beepmybanana, Guest and Guest** **for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So here is the next chapter, I hope you like it. This story is going in a completely different direction to what I had imagined when I started, but hey, I'm rolling with the punches. Anyway, enjoy.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS: LA.**

* * *

Deeks woke surrounded by warmth from the body that he was lying across and the arms that were wrapped around him. He smiled at the feel. At knowing it was Callen's arms he was in and it was Callen's chest he'd woken upon. A smile that only grew when he felt the feather light touch of lips on his forehead.

"Morning, G." He murmured as he turned to open his eyes and stare into the other man's blues ones. A blue which he'd once thought so cold, but now only saw affection in. Oh yes this was definitely the way to wake up in the morning.

"Hey." Callen replied, before bending his head so he could kiss his man on the lips. It was gentle and chase, and the perfect good morning kiss in both their minds.

"Hmmm, I could stay here all day." Deeks responded when their lips parted, allowing him to snuggle closer to the other man putting action to his words. After all he wasn't on shift until later, they could happily spend the whole morning in bed if they wanted to.

"I wish I could." Callen replied with a sigh, and not for the first time he cursed Hetty. Of course a part of his brain, the part that always saw all angles reminded him that without her intervention he wouldn't even be there that day. Though he knew on balance he would prefer to not be there and for Marty to be happy, than to have him as upset as he'd seen him the previous evening.

"Why can't you?" Deeks asked with a frown and a pout on his lips. He didn't want G to go, especially as he was pretty sure that if he did he wouldn't be returning. And he wanted to spend time with his boyfriend when he wasn't in tears or in need of his help.

"I have to go see Hetty. But when I'm done, I promise to come back to bed. How does that sound?" Callen answered, a smirk appearing on his lips at his bargaining suggestion. I mean Sam wouldn't believe he'd solved Hetty's case in a single night, he might as well make the most of it, right?

Deeks contemplated those words. In truth he didn't want G to leave him, but he knew he needed to go see Hetty. Needed to sort out why she'd come. But that didn't make him want him to leave.

"Well, I guess that could work. I could get in a surf." Deeks finally replied realising there really wasn't much other choice.

"That you can. I will try not to be long." Callen responded bending to kiss his boyfriend once more before pulling himself out of the bed. He really didn't want to get up. But he knew he had to talk to Hetty, however much he didn't want to. And hey, he could level one more thing at her door, being the reason he had to leave his boyfriend in bed alone. Not that he was going to tell her that fact, but he could think it. It would make sure he didn't give into her. Because this was not something he would forgive easily, that he knew for sure. No one hurt Marty and got away with it. Not in his world. Not now he was his to love and protect.

* * *

Hetty was sat in the breakfast room of the hotel, enjoying a morning cup of tea, though it was not up to her usual standards. But you could not have everything, and she'd had worse in her time. She was contemplating what words she was going to say to her boy when he arrived. Thinking about what she would need to say to get the answers she sort. Because there were things she needed to know, and she would not let Mr Callen get out of not telling them to her.

She was just considering asking for more tea when the chair opposite her was unceremoniously taken by her wayward son. "Mr Callen, a pleasure to see you this morning." She said with a smile as she looked him over, noticing that he seemed well rested even after racing up from LA the previous day.

"Hetty, what are you doing here?" Callen asked, even if he knew the answer to that from the conversation Frank had with her. He wanted to hear it from her own lips.

"I am sure you are already aware of my intentions for this journey." She answered simply, though with a calculating gaze in her eyes. She wanted to know if Frank Monroe had shared her conversation with the man across from her.

"I want to hear you say it." Callen replied letting her know the answer to that question, but not letting her off the hook of his ire.

"Very well, I came for you. I wanted to make sure that you were safe." Hetty responded straightening her spine as she did so. She knew he would not appreciate her words, but they were the truth in her mind.

"That's a lie. You'd have done the same background check I did on Frank and Henry the first time you registered my car here. Try again." Callen growled out. He was not letting her off that easily. He wasn't going to let her play the 'I want you safe' card. Because he didn't believe it for a minute. He knew the truth was she wanted to know what he was doing. Because she had to know everything. And that had to stop, now.

"I came to find out why you kept coming back here, and yet told no one about it." Hetty replied with a sigh. She should have known better than to expect him to accept her first answer, though it was still the truth as she saw it. He was always so prone to trouble she needed to know what he was doing to protect him from it.

"I am allowed to have my own secrets you know. You do not have the right to know everything that happens in my life." Callen responded narrowing his eyes at the woman in front of him. I mean she had enough of her own secrets, why couldn't he have his? Why did she have to know everything, and yet he knew nothing in return?

Hetty couldn't help but concede his point. "I am aware. But your safety and protection is my concern, Mr Callen." She replied wanting to make sure she got her point home, that she did not mean anything bad by coming here.

"You send me into dangerous situations on a daily basis." Callen dismissed with a shrug. It was their job to go into unsafe situations. Her words meant nothing.

"Situations I control. And situations I can pull you out of if needs be." Hetty replied a stern tone entering her voice as the argument heated between the two of them.

"Tell that to Deeks." Callen spat back. What she was saying was meaningless in the face of what his boyfriend had gone through.

At his words Hetty took a deep breath before responding. After all they would get nowhere if they both started shouting at each other. "You know that was not my call."

"But if it had been, you'd have made the same one Granger did." Callen replied without hesitation. He knew she would have thought of the good of the mission before the idea of pulling Sam and Deeks out of Sidorov's clutches.

"I would, no matter who had been inside. But Mr Callen, so would you." Hetty responded quietly. Her words were followed by silence as Callen digested them. As he realised the truth in them. He too would have made the call to leave Sam and Deeks in to maintain Michelle's cover, and in realising that he hated himself just a little bit more.

"I know. Doesn't make the fallout any easier to deal with." He responded with a sigh, all fight leaving him at his mental discovery.

"It is never easy. Even if we'd pulled them out when we went in the first time, it would have been too late to protect Mr Deeks from what he is going through now." Hetty replied softly, hoping to help her boy.

"I suppose." Callen replied, though he knew that if they'd pulled Deeks out, at least they wouldn't have demolished his trust, wouldn't have destroyed the faith he'd once had in Kensi. And he was pretty sure that that could have been the defining point in Deeks' recovery, or lack of.

"How is he doing?" Hetty asked when Callen said nothing more. She wanted to make sure that Mr Deeks was all right. That she had not set him back too much by her unexpected arrival. She never wanted to cause him pain after all.

"I don't know. He seems okay." Callen replied with a shrug, not wanting to go into how Marty was doing with her. He wouldn't betray his boyfriend's trust by sharing anything with the woman in front of him, even if he did think of her as family. Marty came first.

"Does he have someone to talk to?" Hetty asked understanding she would get no more. That she was not entitled to any more in Callen's mind. But she would respect that, he had Mr Deeks best interests at heart, and that was all that mattered right then.

"He has me." Callen answered in a tone that brooked no arguments in its fierceness, almost as if he thought she would try and pull him away from the man he cared for so deeply. The man he'd finally found the start of happiness with.

"While I am sure that is of great comfort, he needs to see someone. I could recall Nate if it would help." Hetty suggested. She did not know the true extent of what Mr Deeks was going through, but she would not be surprised if he was suffering from PTSD. He would need help, a help that Mr Callen was not qualified to give.

"No. Nate won't help. No one from Deeks' time in LA can help him at the moment." Callen replied. But her words did get him thinking. He was so far away, and Marty's reaction to Hetty he knew he couldn't explain or justify. Maybe Marty did need someone else. Someone whose job it was to help people in situations like his.

"And yet you seem to be doing a very good job of doing so." Hetty responded with a raised eyebrow at how it seemed he did not see himself as someone from Deeks' time in LA. That was very telling in her mind. It told her that the relationship between him and former detective had fundamentally changed so much that Mr Deeks did not think of him as part of his previous life.

"That's different." Callen replied, shuffling in his sit slightly. He could see her connecting the dots, but he wasn't going to give her anything. She had no right to know what was between him and Marty, not now, not ever. Not until they chose to tell her.

"How so? You and Mr Deeks were never close, you were not his partner-" Hetty started to say, trying to think of the words she could use to get him to confirm her suspicions about how their relationship had evolved.

"Hetty stop. Don't ask those questions because I am not going to answer them." Callen interrupted, unintentionally answering all that she wasn't allowed to ask.

"Ah. Very well. Do you think he would be up to seeing me today? I would like to offer my apologies for the upset if nothing else." She asked changing the conversation away from the romantic relationship she now knew her boy was in with the former detective. She was not sure if she approved of such a relationship. Mr Deeks was obviously suffering from mental trauma, she did not think that now was the best time to start such a relationship, but she was not going to address her worries to Callen. So she would stay away, and watch from a distance, ready to intervene if she ever needed to.

"No. In fact I want you to stay far away from here. And I will know if you come here again. Frank and Henry have spy's everywhere." Callen replied simply, though there was a glint in his eyes that she knew better than to cross. She did not want to think of what he would do if she broke his decree to stay away from the man he cared for. After all she had seen what he'd done for her over the years, and she knew he was capable of anything if he put his mind to it. So no, she would not be coming here again.

"I am sure they do. I will honour your wish Mr Callen, and I will make sure none of the rest of the team come here also." Hetty replied sincerely, letting him know she would support him in whatever he needed to do to help Mr Deeks. After all it was NCIS's duty to help one who had been hurt while working for them. If that meant keeping people from him while letting Callen stay close, then she would comply.

"About that. I texted Sam to tell him you put me on a special assignment." Callen responded wondering just how she would react to that. After all he wasn't actually working right then. But he knew she could find a work around if she really put her mind to it. And she would have to, because he was not going back to LA just yet. Marty still needed him.

"Very well, I will process the paperwork when I return. Do you have any idea how long this assignment will take?" Hetty asked not even batting an eyelid at his words. He was helping one of their own, she would support him however he needed it, within reason of course.

At that Callen thought. His initial answer was a couple of days, but then he remembered Hetty's suggestion of getting Nate to help Marty. He knew he couldn't ask him, but there was another he trusted. Someone he trusted not only with his life, but enough to take care of his boyfriend if he wasn't there to do it. Therefore he changed his estimation. "A week."

"Then I will get you sighed off of cases for the next seven days." Hetty replied. She did not know what was going through his mind, but she could see the cogs turning and knew he was coming up with some sort of plan. It was what he did best after all.

"Thank you, Hetty." Callen replied, giving her the first true smile since he sat down. Her support was something he'd never expected to have, but he was extremely glad that he had it.

"You are most welcome, Callen. I now understand why you never told me where he was. It was never about you not wanting me to find him and dragging him back, it was about what he needed." Hetty responded a sad smile on her own lips at her words. She hadn't realised it was this bad, if she had she would have gotten Mr Deeks the help he needed in LA. Though even as she thought that she knew it would not have worked. Because Mr Deeks had not just needed help, he'd needed what he'd found here. He needed the family love and fatherly protection Frank and Henry Monroe had given him.

"It's always about what he needs, Hetty." Callen replied simply. And with those words he told Hetty that Deeks was more than just a relationship, more than just someone he cared for. No Mr Deeks was someone her boy could love, and that she would go to the ends of the earth to protect if she had to.

"Yes, so it would seem. Well I must pack, I have a long drive ahead of me. I will see you in a week, Mr Callen, and I expect a positive report from your assignment upon your return." She said standing, smiling down at her boy. She couldn't help but wonder if he knew just what Mr Deeks could be to him, but that didn't matter. He would tell her when he discovered the truth, and when he was ready to do so. She would just have to settle for waiting until that time.

With that Hetty left, leaving Callen sitting there watching as she walked out the door. He wasn't sure he truly believed that she was going to put him helping Marty down as a special assignment, but it seemed she was. He didn't know why, but well he wasn't going to question the fact he now had more time to spend with Marty, and more time to get him the help he needed. With that in mind he made his way out to his car, but rather than start his engine he pulled out his phone. Turning it back on he scrolled through the contacts until he found the name he was looking for. Pressing call he put the phone to his ear. "Hi, yes. I'd like to speak to Dr Jasmine Dale please. Tell her its Michael Hamish calling." He said, waiting with baited breath to be transferred to the only person he could think of that could possibly help his boyfriend through the pain and hurt he was feeling.

"Callen? Been a while." Came the female voice down the line, he could hear the smile in her voice as she said his name.

"Hey Jas." Callen responded smiling himself as he heard the voice of the woman he hadn't spoken to in years, but knew would help him without hesitation.

"So, how can I help you?" Jasmine asked already looking through her diary thinking of what she would need to rearrange depending on just what it was Callen needed her for. After all he'd saved her life in her long ago military past, and she would do anything for him.

"I'm not calling for me, but my boyfriend." Callen answered, he words saying a lot more than they did at face value.

And well, hearing that Jasmine Dale didn't need to think about her response. She knew a favour being called in from a mile off, and the one she owed Callen was big. Therefore she said the only thing of importance. "When and where?"


	29. Chapter 29

**Hello my lovelies. I would like to thank** **heyjode,** **Catarina4057 and Guest** **for the wonderful reviews. I would also like to thank those of you who have followed and favoured since my last update.**

 **So sorry for the long absence. I got a bit of writers block, as such this chapter feels a bit of a filler to me, but I hope you like it anyway.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own NCIS: LA.**

* * *

When Callen returned to the bar Marty was just coming out of the shower, having washed the sea salt from his hair, and Callen had to confess, he looked seriously sexy. Therefore without saying anything he moved to give his boyfriend a kiss, pushing his hands into the still damp locks as he did so.

"Well I certainly like that greeting." Deeks said when they finally pulled apart, both breathing slightly heavier than normal at the intensity of the kiss.

"Hmm, I think we should make it a regular thing." Callen agreed with a twinkle in his eyes before closing the distance and taking the other man's lips in another deep heated kiss. He couldn't stop himself, even if he knew they needed to talk, he needed this more. Needed to know that he and Marty were okay, even after all that had happened with Hetty. Needed to know Marty was his, and just needed the man he had opened his heart to.

Deeks responded without thought, gladly following wherever Callen chose to lead. As such when he felt himself being walked backwards towards the bed he certainly didn't put up any fight. Though when they got there rather than falling backwards and taking Callen with him, he climbed onto his knees, while not breaking the kiss once. He then preceded to move backwards, making Callen chase his lips as he did so.

That was how, when they finally came up for air a second time, they were kneeing opposite each other in the middle of the bed.

"Hey." Callen finally said softly, moving to hook Marty's hair behind his ears as he did so.

That was the sign Deeks knew meant that there impromptu make-out session was at an end. It was time for them to talk, even if he really didn't want to. He knew they needed to. Needed to discuss what Hetty said, and they needed to do it before Callen had to head off back to LA. But damn did Deeks not want him to go.

"So what did Hetty have to say?" He asked deciding to take the bull by the horns.

"That see's giving me a week to finish my 'special assignment'." Callen replied smirking when he saw Marty's eyes widen at his words.

"And what special assignment is that, G?" Deeks asked with a raised eye brow, because he was pretty sure G wasn't on one.

"Making sure you're okay." Callen responded simply. He wasn't going to lie to Marty. What would be the point in that?

"Wait, she gave you a week off, to be with me? Just what did you say to her?" Deeks asked in amazed confusion. The idea of having G with him for a whole week was more than he could imagine, it was fantastic. He couldn't believe that Hetty had just agreed to that without some serious convincing.

"That you were the only thing that mattered right now." Callen replied with a shrug.

"Wow." Deeks whispered, falling backwards so he was sitting against the headboard as he took in what G had just said. What those words meant, to both him and what they would have meant to Hetty when he told them to her. He'd never considered G would put him first like that. Okay sure he knew he cared for him, knew they were together, but the idea that G would tell Hetty that he was staying here to help him, that Deeks had not expected.

"It's not that surprising, Marty." Callen replied moving so he was sitting next him and could entwine their fingers as they talked.

"It is to me." Deeks muttered, but quietly enough that Callen felt he wasn't supposed to hear it and as such decided to pretend he didn't. Not to mention there was something else he needed to discuss with the man at his side, and he didn't think he was going to like what he had to say.

"Marty, I've been thinking it might be good if your saw someone." He said cautiously, not sure how else to start the conversation that he needed to have with the younger man.

What do you mean, G?" Deeks asked with a frown.

"I mean a doctor that can help you deal with everything." Callen replied wincing at the words and how they caused Marty to tense up beside him.

"You want me to go to a shrink?" Deeks asked in an even tone. His first thought was to say no. But then he remembered how he'd been the previous night. Remembered how he'd realised that he hadn't actually gotten any further than he had when he left LA. How he needed to find a way to deal with everything that was in his mind. Maybe the idea of seeing someone, a professional, wasn't such a bad idea. Maybe.

"Yes." Callen replied carefully watching the thoughts flitter through Marty's eyes as he did so. He was glad he hadn't said an outright no, but he knew he still wasn't completely on-board with the idea from the wary look he had.

"I'm not talking to Nate, G. No matter what you say." Deeks responded absolutely. He could already see where this was going, and he knew Hetty would be able to recall the guy, but there was no way he was talking to him. No matter what. He didn't want to talk to anyone who knew him, who he called a friend. He didn't want him to know about the nightmares and his fears, just no.

"I wasn't thinking of Nate. I have a friend, she specialises in helping people who've been through traumatic situations. I thinking maybe you could met her, see if you'd be able to let her help you." Callen answered him.

Deeks tilted his head at that, though he wasn't surprised that Callen already had someone lined up. It was who he was after all. Always having a plan. But still he had to ask, "what about the security aspect?"

"Her clearance is higher than yours ever was. It'll be fine. Look I've asked her to come down in a couple of days. I'll be there when you meet,-" Callen started to explain only for Deeks to interrupt him.

"G, I don't know. Some stranger-" Deeks said, already feeling himself start to tense and his breathing start to accelerate at the idea of meeting someone new. Of introducing someone else into his bubble world of the bar. He wasn't sure he could do that. He'd been maybe okay at the general idea, but to know that someone was already on their way…

Callen moved when he noticed the change in the man at his side. Moved so he was kneeling next to him, his hands pushed into his hair so he could stare into his eyes as he spoke. "I trust her Marty. And I need someone I trust near you when I can't be. I don't want you to ever have to go through what you did yesterday alone."

The words were so sincere they eased the tension in Deeks. Eased his breathing as he stared into G's eyes and saw how honest he was being.

"Fine, I'll meet her. But no promises." He finally agreed. There was no other answer he could give when G looked at him like that. When he showed him how much he needed him to be safe.

"That's all I ask. Thank you." Callen replied before closing the distance between them and kissing Marty once more, though this time it was less heated passion and more a show of feelings. An exchange of sentiment and caring that they both felt for each other. A show that they were there for each other, there together, and that they weren't going anywhere.

* * *

Jasmine Dale drove into the non-descript town and smiled at the idyllic-ness of it. She got out of her car, but rather going to the hotel and checking in, she instead decided to take a walk around, getting a lay of the land. Because if Martin Deeks accepted her as his therapist this town was going to become her home for the foreseeable future. Might as well see what was there. Not to mention see what office space she could get. After all she was sure there were others here who could use her help, and while she was here primarily for Callen's boyfriend, that didn't stop her helping others as well in her mind.

Walking down to the docks, she watched as the small fishing boats bobbed on the water, watching as those that worked them moved in a seamless dance around each other accompanied by the cries of human voices and birds alike. It was peaceful yet bustling, and she loved it. It had been a long time since she had been in a place like this, having spent so much of her civilian life in cities. It was nice to get away from the hustle of her normal life.

She took her time watching, soaking it all in before she head back towards the hotel, her mind turning to the man she had come to help as she did so. It had taken a tug on more than few strings to gain access to Martin Deeks' medical records, but she had done it. And as such she knew exactly what he had been through, physically at least. His physiological profile was woefully inadequate in her opinion, but then she expected nothing less when the phycologist doing it was also a friend and work colleague. In her experience people rarely opened up to those they knew, especially those whose lives could depend upon them one day. No one wanted their vulnerabilities to be known by the one who could find themselves in a situation where they would question their dependability due to those vulnerable aspects.

She hoped she would do better. Hoped she could get Martin Deeks to talk, and help him through all that was going on in his head. And it wasn't just because she owed Callen, but because Deeks needed her help. Callen may have been the one to point her in his direction, but she would have come without the debt after reading his file. After all she knew exactly how he felt, she'd been there herself, and it was somewhere no one should ever be alone.


End file.
